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Yo Mama Jokes
Yo Mama Jokes 1
Yo Mama Jokes 2
Yo Mama Jokes 3
Yo Mama Jokes 4
Yo Mama Jokes 5
Yo Mama Jokes 6
Yo Mama Jokes 7
Yo Mama Jokes 8
Yo Mama Jokes 9
Yo Mama Jokes 10
Blond Jokes
Long Blond Jokes
Short Blond Jokes
Quiz
Oreo Test
The Quiz
Bumper Stickers
Do Not Say It To A Cop
Drive Thru
Life Test
Bored Things 2 Do
Emotions
Funny Songs
Pick Up Lines
Pick Up Lines 1
Pick Up Lines 2
Pokemon Obbsession
Putdowns
100 Creative Pizza Orders
100 Dumb Blonde Jokes
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| Pick-Up Lines 1. "Hey, im lost can you lead me to your house? 2. "Baby, heaven must be missing an angel, 'cause there's one standing in front of me right now" 3.[check tag on girl's shirt]"Just as I thought, Made in Heaven" 4.[motion for girl to come here with one finger]"If I can make you come with this finger, imagine what I could do with all five!" 5.[grab girls ass]"Excuse me miss, but is this seat taken?" 6. "Baby, you won't EVER get into heaven, 'cause it MUST be a sin to look that good!" 7. "Hey baby, can I get some fries with that SHAKE" 8. "Boy, I wish I had a swing like that in my back yard!" 9. "Nice shoes, wanna fuck?" 10. [Wet your finger and touch girls/guys shirt]"Let's get you out of those WET clothes!" 11. "If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?" 12. "I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?" 13. "Sex is a killer. Wanna die happy?" 14. "The only place that dress would look better than on you is on my floor!" 15. "fuck me if I'm wrong...but havent we meet before" 16. "your parents are thiefs...they stole the stars and put them in your eyes" 17. "do you wanna have kids one day?" "Yes" "wanna go halfies?" 18. "Do you wanna go halfies on kids?" "NO!" "Ok you can keep them then" 19. "Thats a nice shirt but I’ll bet it would look better wadded up on my bedroom floor." 20. "Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?" 21. "Do you have a quarter? Because mom told me to make sure and call when I found the woman of my dreams." 22. "I wanna use your thighs as earmuffs" 23. "Girl I know your legs are hurting cause youve been running through my head all day long" 24. "Girl you look so good I wish I could plant you & grow a whole field of yall" 25. "Are those real?" 26. "I may not be Fred Flinstone but i sure can make your bed rock" 27. "There's a party in my pants and youre invited" 28. "[Give girl card that says "Smile if you wanna fuck"]" 29. "[Offer girl/guy a screw]"Wanna Screw?"" 30. "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together" 31. "Ya know, that shirt is very becoming on you.....of course, if I was on you, I'd be cumming too." 32. "The word of the day is "LEGS" so let's go to my house and spread the word." 33. "Youre dad must have been a baker because you have the best buns." 34. "[Girl tells you to go]"The only place I want to go is south of the border" 35. "Hey you want to know what I heard about you? Fuck me and I'll tell you" 36. "Hey, baby wanna get a pizza and fuck? (answers no) whats the matter you don't like pizza?" 37. "Why don't you come over and we can do math in the bed; add the bed, subtract the clothes, devide the legs and I'll mulitiptly" 38. "Hi. I'm Big Brother. I've been watching you..." 39. "Lie down; I think I love you." 40. "What's a nice girl like you doing on a face like this?" 41. "Let's have breakfast together; shall I call you or nudge you?" 42. "My friend and I have a fifty-cent bet that you won't take off your blouse in a public place." 43. "I know a great way to burn off the 300 calories in that pastry you just ate." 44. "I'm learning Latin; would you like to come home with me and help me practice oral declinsions?" 45. "Nice dress, can I talk you out of it?" 46. "Mmmm, you bring new meaning to the word "edible"." 47. "Hey babe, do you realize that my mouth can generate over 750 psi?" 48. "At the office copy machine: "Reproducing, eh? Can I help?"" 49. "So, do you wanna see something really swell?" 50. "Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven?" 51. "Excuse me but is your last name Gillette.... cause you are the best a man can get!!" 52. "I think we must make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW!" 53. "Hey baby...can you suck a golf ball through 50 feet of garden hose?" 54. "Hey baby...can you suck start a Harley?" 55. "My shirt's chaffing me..." 56. "Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you." 57. "May I end this sentence with a proposition?" 58. "Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? (No.) Well, then, allow me to introduce myself." 59. "All those curves, and me with no brakes" 60. "They call me Milk, because I do your body good." 61. "Wanna have some fun? I got the "f" and the "n", now all I need is "u."" 62. "I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?" 63. "hey baby, wanna wrestle?" 64. "Smiling's the second best thing a person can do with their mouth...why don't I show you the first? 65. "If I followed you home, would you keep me?" 66. "Hi, do you want to have my children? (assuming the answer is 'no') , OK then, can we just practice?" 67. "If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?" 68. "I was just holding this cigarette and thinking how much I'd rather be holding you." 69. "You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy." 70. "I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?" 71. "I'm sorry miss, haven't you ever seen a guy lick his eyebrows with his tongue?" 72. "Would you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?" 73. "I'm not Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you like!" 74. "Schawiiing!" 75."Baby, love is my fuel, and you fill my tank." 76."Hey are you wearing space pants? Cuz your butt is out of this world!" 77."Hey is it hot in here or is it just you!" 78."You have 250 bones in your body, you want another?" 79. "If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public...." 80. "First of all i'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips - then move up to your belly button!" 81. "Hey Baby- it's my birthday, and I'm the cake and you're the candles...Wanna PARTY?" 82. "Hey baby, are you in the mood for swimming? 'Cause I was hoping I could show you my breast stroke." 83. "Hi. My name is [your name], you might want to remember that, because you'll be screaming it all night." 84. "Bond, James Bond." 85. "Im dRuNk, HAhAHhahHAHahHAHaHa!!" 86. "[put a dollar partially hanging out of your pants] and when a girl asks about the dollar tell her it's all you can eat for under a dollar" 87. "Do you wax those jeans because I can see myself in them." 88. "Let's play Amusement Park - You sit on my face, and I'll guess your weight." 89. "HEy baby wanna ride my convertable its got a pop up top and its good for a long ride." 90. "Hey baby, can I tickle your belly from the inside? 91. "You remind me of my breakfast this morning [why, what did you have?] Hot cross buns..." 92. "Pardon me, but may I attempt to seduce you?" 93. "I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?" 94. "I'm not trying anything. I always put my hands there." 95. "Your father must be a drug dealer because you sure are dope." 96. "I think your name is Angel 'cause you look like heaven" 97. "Do you have a mirror in your pocket because i can see myself in your pants" 98. "Do u believe in love at first sight, if not I can walk in the door agian. " 99. "I'm an asshole. (cuz women never like the nice guys)" 100. "Hey, honey! I got a sixer out in the trunk!" 101. "Yo, baby! I bust more nuts than a squirrel." 102. "[while on a date in a pick-em-up-truck] Ya know...we're in the back seat right now... and you know what goes on there." 103. "Want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?" 104. "Did you here you can burn the most calories through sex? Want to start a weight loss program?" 105. "I've noticed you noticing me and I'm just giving you notice that I've noticed you!" 106. "(for short people)Hey baby,some of us use our hormones growing tall and others use em growing other extensions." 107."Wanna play army? I'll lay and you can blow the hell outta me!" 108."Excuse me, but your under citizen arrest, because it's got to be illegal to be looking that good!" 109."girl if you were a porch I'd take out all the nails and screw ya!" 110."I need a twenty thousand ton penguin. [he/she replies "Why?"] Oh sorry, I'm just trying to break the ice." 111. Is there a mirror in your pocket, because I can definately see myself in your pants tonight! |
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