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Beware, you have had too much wrestling.....
* When you go to a Japanese restaurant, you start a "USA! USA!" chant
* When you search & search the bible for the book of Austin
* When you're getting beat up in a bar fight, but you honestly believe that with a little crowd support, you can turn this thing around
* When you won't leave the bathroom until they play your theme music
* If you hit your co-worker in head with a chair while your manager is distracting him
* When a guy steals your girl, you consider it an angle
* When you rack your neighbours dog
* When you attend a graduation, and yell "Ooooooh yeah!" when 'Pomp and Circumstance' plays
* When you are involved in a bar fight with a guy twice your size and you think your best line of attack is putting the Tongan death grip on him
* When you go to a dance and start dancing like Alex Wright
* When you try to put your kids to bed with a sleeper hold
* When you win an award and immediately spray paint "nWo" on it
* When you rate women on a scale of Chyna to Trish
* When you begin to shake someone's hand in public but then hesitate to look for the crowd's response
* When you do heel turns on your best friends for no reason.
* If whenever you walk into a party you tell them to "cut the music"
* When anytime anybody asks you a question, you grab the mike and yell, "MEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAN GEEEEEEEEEEEEEENEE"
* When you dye your moustache blond while leaving your beard black
* If you keep waiting for run-ins during boxing matches
* After an argument with a friend, you shake hands, hug each other and then after you raise both yours and your friend's arms in the air, as he looks to the side, you clothesline him
* If you carry a foreign object in your underwear
* When you go into work you insult everyone you see just to draw heat
* If you're a Honky Tonk Man impersonator instead of an Elvis impersonator
* If you wore spiked shoulder pads during a football game
* If you really think it's cool to wear a wrestling t-shirt out in public
* If you loose a job, you change your look and name before starting a new one
* When you are working for that other company, your old boss is constantly badmouthing you to customers
* If you find out that you have been fired by calling up the company's hotline
* If you purposely blade yourself while shaving
* If you suspect your best friend is just setting you up for a heel turn
* When before a fight, you give away a pair of sunglasses to a kid
* When you put your kids to bed, you tell them to "Rest In Peace"
* When you go to a funeral and assume that the deceased just lost a Casket Match
* When your king-size bed has ropes and turnbuckles surrounding it
* If you walk into church and slap people's hands in the pews while walking down the aisle
* If you paint your face and don't speak to your co-workers
* When you go to your daughter's softball game and start a "we want blood" chant
* If you get into an argument with a friend at work and challenge him to a loser must retire match
* When you see a fight in the streets and call the moves
* If you refer to all the women in your work area your valets
* When you keep flour in your underpants (just in case)
* If you refer to The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal as rag sheets.
But for those who think they have already gone wrestling crazy, confirm it if.....
* You start every sentence with the words "Well, ya know, Mean Gene..." or "Let me tell ya something..."
* You refer to everyone you talk to as "brother"
* Every time you see someone yawning, you get an uncontrollable urge to thrust your fingers down their throat and screech uncontrollably
* Your children are named "Crippler", "Hitman" and "Hollywood"
* You hold a wrestling tournament for an aluminium foil belt
* You constantly play really bad air guitar on your foil belt that you cheated to win
* On Halloween, you pull a Jericho and steal all the trick-or-treaters' masks and then claim them as "prizes"
* You get kicked off the school wrestling team for chokeslamming your opponent
* You cried when the Giant went nWo
* You took bagpipe lessons just so you could play Roddy Piper's theme music
* You get in fights with people who say wrestling is fake
* You fenced in your bed, so it feels like being in a steel cage
* You throw your VCR away when you can't find Rick Steiner on your copy of "Gremlins"
* Your best friend is a microphone
* After your parents ground you for a week, you refer to them as "heels"
* You dress your dog up as a "Hulkamaniac"
* You use the phrase "Too Sweet" more than 45 times daily
* You try to impress your friends by telling them Bobby Heenan jokes
* You honestly believe that "TBS" stands for "The Brain Station"
* You think "No Holds Barred" should win an Oscar
* Your greatest accomplishment in life is mastering the sleeper hold
* You roped in your backyard and you get together with friends to throw chairs around
* You requested "3:16" as your new license plate
* You think a tilt-a-whirl looks fun
* You give crotch chops to the opposing team during a softball game
* You feel sorry for jobbers
* You try wrestling on a trampoline
* You wear a arm cast just to hit people with it
* You challenge your mum and sister to a triple-threat nightgown match
* You become a garbage man just to play around with metal trash cans

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