Jokes From Lycos Chatters - **All names in (name) are the chat room names** - Jokes - http://maxpages.com/timjokepage/Lycos

Monica Lewinski is walking on a beach and she finds a bottle with a genie in it. She rubs it, and out pops a genie to grant her three wishes. Monica says, "I already have fame and riches so I would like to get rid of my love handles. The genie nods and her ears disappear! (Beccaroo)

What do you call 200 black people at the botoom of the ocean?
Not enough! (tntc4bikes)

What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb! (Hey_Im_Taken)

Baseball is wrong. A man with four balls cannot walk! (purple stain)

What do a tablecloth and a blonde have in common?
They both get laid three times a day! (barty_82)

What does Bill Clinton say to Hillary after having sex?
I'll be home in twenty minutes! (1_Xklusive_17M)

What is green and eats nuts?
Gonorrhea! (Doctor_gonZo_X)

A guy walks into an Ice cream shop and looks at the menu. There is a new flavor there called "Pussy Flavored Ice Cream". He orders it and takes a big lick. He almost pukes and tells the Ice cream shop guy it tastes like shit. He says, "That's because you licked too far!" (scruffymole)

Why don't women need watches?
Ovens have timers! (Doctor_gonZo_X)

Why did Bill Clinton stop playing the saxophone?
He started playing the Whore-Monica! (Orange_bananas)

Your Momma's drawers are so holy when she farts they whistle! (Hot Pepper Girl)

What is 69 times 4?
Dinner for four! (DJerrel)

A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Give me a gin and tonic." The bartender pulls out an apple from under the bar. The man asks him, "What the hell are you doing?" The bartender says, "Just take a bite." The man takes a bite and says, "Tastes like gin." Bartender says, "Turn it around." Guy turns it around and takes a bite......... "Tastes like tonic." Amused, the guy says, "Give me a screwdriver." Once again, the bartender pulls out an apple. The man is dumbfounded again. "What is this????" he asks. The bartender says, "Take a bite." The man does......."Tastes like vodka." "Turn it around," says the bartender. He turns it around......."Tastes like orange juice," says the man. Just then, a beautiful woman walks into the bar. The man says, "You know what I could go for right now, bartender......some pussy!!!" The bartender pulls out another apple from under the bar. The man is in absolute awe!!!!! He exclaims, "NO WAY!!." The bartender says, "Take a bite." The man takes a bite and says, "YUCK, that tastes like shit!!!!!!!!!!" The bartender says, "TURN IT AROUND!" (silverado_ss)

Timothy Hall

hatrick13@mailcity.com

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Page Updated Fri Apr 27, 2001 4:18am EDT