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Meanwhile, in another corner of town… a sonic-speeding force roamed the city streets, whizzing by everything in his path and causing blasts of wind in his wake.
“Oh, if only I could prove to my fellow heroes that I am not a criminal! I only followed Electrodok because I thought his intentions were to better mankind! Only the Uncanny X-mutants would understand my plight! If I can get to them, then I will be on my way!”
But because of the blasts of winds that he created blew around the city, a roaming newspaper floated his way upon his face, almost as if it were itself trying to reach his attention.
“What’s this? A way to redeem myself?”
He read the headline, which itself said, “The Face: Wanted for Bombing Questioning.”
“The Face? Ah, this must be it! My chance to show my true colors! By apprehending this ‘Face’ character, I shall be able to redeem myself and better my image in the eyes of this society! Maybe then I can spread my fame as a hero so that I will be portrayed as a villain no longer!”
He then zipped upon a road ahead, leaving a path of simmering smoke behind him.
****
“Hello, Mr. McFly…” I greeted a startled, old janitor, who cowered in fright.
“Please, faceless man! Don’t hurt me! You’re a danger to society! Turn yerself in before it’s too late!”
“Calm down, Lampwick, I’m not going to hurt you. I’m just wondering why you accused me of a crime when you and I both heard a commotion on the upper level of that Studio that night in the not too distant past.”
“I… had to do it! It was my duty! You planned that whole thing with an accomplice!”
“Now honestly, why would I go through the trouble of doing that?”
“You was trying to distract me! So that the bomb would git planted.”
“So you’re telling me, that I would let my accomplice plant the bomb, while I distracted you… and then I would go upstairs right before the bombs exploded to check on them?”
“Well I… I… suppose it’s possible!”
I clenched my hand.
“Now tell me, why wouldn’t I have just run away…” I raised my hand. “… or even worse, knocked you out cold in the first place?”
The old man blinked in cowardice, slowly sulking down into a shell like a turtle.
“B…b…because you wasn’t the one who planted the bomb?” He guessed.
“Exactly,” I said pointing my index finger upward. “Aren’t you glad you have the facts straight now?”
Lampwick nodded.
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“Another thing… the bombs exploded WHILE I was inside the building, and I only escaped by climbing down the drainpipes, to make the facts even straighter. But what I want to know is… out of the many years of hard-working labor and low pay you’ve endured, were there any employees that caused trouble in the studio, or were fired from the team?”
“Well, lots o’ people caused trouble… ‘specially for kids, I mean that’s what they did on Tomfoolery. But they’re gone now. I dunno where they be. Maybe you can ask the writers or directors of the staff?”
“You wouldn’t happen to have access to a list of some sort or something?” I wondered.
“Hey, you got internet! Why don’t you use it! You young hooligans these days… with yer tech-no-LO-gy.”
“Alright, Mr. McFly, thanks for the tip.” And then I went out the door.
But as I walked down the last step of the old apartment building, a chilling wind wove by me in a gusty, rapid manner.
“Pretty windy out here,” I said, holding my hat.
But then I heard a voice.
“Ah! The Face, I presume! I recognize you from this wanted poster! It is time, Face! I must turn you into the authorities for the crime you’ve committed! But do not worry, I don’t wish to harm you, for I wish that you surrender willingly. However, I will use force if need be.”
“First of all, who are you?” I asked, seeing the light blue outfit that the unmentioned hero wore, which possessed a yellow lightning bolt on the chest, and wings upon a band across the forehead.
“You don’t know who I am? I am the legendary Fastman! Faster than a launching space rocket! More rapid than a reeling mega-train!”
This wasn’t good, I thought. This nut was much faster than me in speed. It would be difficult for me to hide from him, or even hit him. I couldn’t deal with this now, and I had to find answers.
“Listen Fastman, you’ve got the wrong guy. I’m one of the good guys. I don’t destroy buildings. Ask that janitor guy in this house.”
“You lie, for the papers say that you do such things. And to redeem myself, I will be responsible for your capture!”
He zipped his way behind me and bound my hands together. Not wanting to be apprehended so early in my career, I decided to take matters into my own hands, and using my martial arts skills, I struck him in the gut with my elbow unexpectedly, which threw him upon the ground.
He stood back up. “That was a mighty blow, Face! But it was a surprise attack indeed. I did not know you would cause a struggle to happen!”
Using his speed, he knocked me backward and into a pile of garbage. I rubbed my head, and shook it to rid myself of the daze. This wasn’t going to be an easy fight.
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“I do not wish to harm you, Face! You don’t seem like the typical evil villain, so I shall show mercy! But, I must apprehend you! So what I shall do is create a whirlwind so fast that surrounds the very air source you breathe, so as to whisk all the oxygen out of your lungs so that there is a minimal amount left. You shall be so dazed, that you will collapse because of lack of air!”
“And I’m sure lack of oxygen is the most minimal harm you can do just short of brain damage…” I quietly said.
But my mouth was running and the air I was breathing became thinner. Fastman had already begun. Slowly my lungs began to struggle, and I began to feel lightheaded. I did not know how to stop him. If I held my arm out to strike him, my arm would surely be snapped in two because of the high speed he was accelerating at.
I did what any conventional person would have done in a situation like this… or not. I sprayed a can of Cayenne Pepper which I had just received free at Luigi’s Pizza Shack with a purchase of a $7.99 Large, 1-topping pizza with Soda. It sprayed continuously, and in no time flat, Fastman began clutching his burning, stinging eyes in pain.
“Aagh! My quick-seeing eyes!” He cried in agony.
And this was my chance, so I applied the physics of a Crane Kick to knock him flying into the direction of a building wall, where he became unconscious upon impact.
“Sorry about that, friend,” I said.
But then, more sirens came from down the road, and before I knew it four policemen were diligently seeking my $450 head.
“Not again…” I said.
“Alright, Face! You and Fastman better give up! There’s no escape this time!” They cried.
I knew they wouldn’t dare shoot at me with Fastman nearby, so I dragged him along with me slowly wear I went.
“You know, if I were one of those spider heroes, I would be able to web-swing, or wall-crawl away right about now…” I thought to myself.
But I did the next best thing, I hid in another alley, which was now becoming the most common escape route, and up a flight of fire stairs that led to the top of the building that Fastman collided into. It was quite a bit of work. But when things happen quickly, you just sometimes go with it, without thinking.
Fastman soon came to his senses, and rubbed his head.
“Ah, Face, you had the opportunity to obliterate me but you did not. I commend you for your actions, and now I know you are not the criminal that the papers said you were.”
“That figures,” I thought.
“We shall remain allies, I hope for any future events that may follow. But now, I shall seek my redemption for myself and my friends another way… through seeking of the Uncanny X-mutants! I bid you farewell, my friend,” Fastman said.
“Later then, Fastman,” I replied.
And Fastman ran down the side of the building at unimaginable speeds, even fast enough to defy the law of gravity itself, and left a simmering season of smoke upon the street below him.
“That’s pretty fast…” I said to myself.
But then, my cell phone began to ring. It was Samantha back at the Daily Times.
“Face, you’re needed,” she said. And I was on my way once again.
NEXT: The Face faces the Deadly Female Salamander!
6
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