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Blode Jokes
Cat Jokes
lawyer jokes
you might be a redneck if
things never to do
You might be a child of 80s if
Pick Up Lines and Responses
Funny Bumper Stickers
You Might be an Engineer if
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| Cat Humor |
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| Famous Cat Quotes "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." - Unknown "Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." - Anonymous "Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow." - Jeff Valdez "In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb "As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." - Ellen Perry Berkeley "One cat just leads to another." - Ernest Hemingway "Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." - Mary Bly "Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." - Joseph Wood Krutch "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick "There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." - Anonymous "I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." - Hippolyte Taine "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer "The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." - Ernest Menaul "Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." - Unknown "Time spent with cats is never wasted." - Colette "Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well." - Missy Dizick "You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." - Colonial American proverb "Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." - Joseph Wood Krutch "Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit." - John S. Nichols Cat Translations! CAT PHRASE MEANS miaowbu - Feed me. meeow - Pet me. mrooww -I love you. Miioo-oo-oo -I am in love and must meet my betrothed outside beneath the hedge. Don't wait up. mrow -I feel like making noise. rrrow-mawww -Please, the time is come to tidy the cat box. rrrow-miawww -I have remedied the cat box untidiness by shoveling the contents as far out of the box as was practical. miaowmiaow -Play with me. Miaowmioaw -Have you noticed the shortage of available cat toys in this room? mioawmioaw -Since I can find nothing better to play with, I shall see what happens when I sharpen my claws on this handy piece of furniture. raowwwww -I think I shall now spend time licking the most private parts of my anatomy. mrowwwww -I am now recalling, with sorrow, that some of my private parts did not return with me from that visit to the vet. Roww-maww-roww -I am so glad to see that you have returned home with both arms full of groceries. I will now rub myself against your legs and attempt to trip you as you walk towards the kitchen. gakk-ak-ak -My digestive passages seem to have formed a hairball. Wherever could this have come from? I shall leave it here upon the carpeting. mow -Snuggling is a good idea. moww - Shedding is pretty good, too. mowww! -I was enjoying snuggling and shedding in the warm clean laundry until you removed me so unkindly. Miaow! Miaow! - I have discovered that, although one may be able to wedge his body through the gap behind the stove and into that little drawer filled with pots and pans, the reverse path is slightly more difficult to navigate. Mraakk! -Oh, small bird! Please come over here. ssssRoww! -I believe that I have found a woodchuck or similar animal. mmmrowmmm -It is certain that the best tasting fish is one you have caught yourself. mmmmmmm -If I sit in the sunshine for another hour or so, I think I shall be satisfied. Mreoaw -Please ask room service to send up another can of tunafish. Mreeeow -Do you serve catnip with that? mroow -I have forced my body into a tiny space in order to look cute. How'm I doin? Miaooww! Mriaow! -Since you are using the can opener, I am certain that you understand the value of a well-fed and pampered cat. Please continue. |
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