Jokes - http://maxpages.com/state/Yo_Mamma_Jokes

Yo mama's so fat uses blanket as a washcloth
Yo mama's so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
Yo mama's so fat when i took her to the beach, little keds surron "Free Willy, Free WIlly"
Yo mama's so fat when she backs up she beeps
Yo mama's so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
Yo mama's so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
Yo mama's so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama's so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama's so fat when she sits around the house she REALLY sits AROUND the house
Yo mama's so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama's so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama's so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"
Yo mama's so fat when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her ass back in
the water.
Yo mama's so fat when the bitch goes to an all You can eat buffet, they have to install
speed bumps.
Yo mama's so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the
ground.
Yo mama's so fat you smell like bacon at 90 degrees
Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips.
Yo mama was so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama so flat, she's jealous of the wall!
Yo mama so flat, that she's like a pirate's dream, a sunken chest.
Yo mama so flat, that she is a carpenters dream, a board never hammered, nailed or
screwed.
Yo mama so flat, she makes the Grand Canyon look like the Rocky Mountains.
Yo momma so greasy, she used bacon as a band-aid!
Yo momma so greasy, she sweats Crisco!
Yo momma so greasy, Texaco buys Oil from her.
Yo mama so hairy, you almost died of rugburn at birth!
Yo mama so hairy, she's got afros on her nipples!
Yo mama so hairy, she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama so hairy, Bigfoot is taking her picture!
Yo mama so hairy, she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair
Jordan.
Yo mama so hairy, she looks like a Chia Pet with an afro!
Yo mama so hairy, she shaves with a weedwhacker.
Yo mama so hairy, when she asked for a trim at the beauty salon, the stylist opened up
her shirt.
Yo mama so hairy, she's got a gotee growin' around her belly button.
Yo mama's butt so big, she's taller when she sits down.
Yo mama's chest so flat, she's every pirates dream ... a sunken chest.
Yo mama's nose so big, she picks it with a boxing glove.
Yo mama's nose so big, you can go bowling with her boogers.
Yo mama's nosehairs so long, she can have them braided.
Yo mama's armpits so hairy, she looks like she got Buckwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama's armpits so stink, the teacher gave her an A' so she wouldn't need to raise her
hand.
Yo mama's feet so big, they need license plates.
Yo mama's house so small, you ordered a large pizza and had to eat it outside.
Yo mama's house so small, I threw a rock through your window and it hit everybody.
Yo mama's house so small, the front and back doors are on the same hinge.
Yo mama's house so dirty, I have to wipe my feet before I go outside.
Yo mama's house must be made of toilet paper -- cause your whole family's full of shit.
Yo mama's so stink, she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama's so stink, she sweats Black Flag.
Yo mama's ears so big, she can't hold cigarettes behind them.
Yo mama's ears so big, she gets satellite reception.
Yo mama's teeth so bad, her dentures' got cavities.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, she'd put the sun out of business.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, you never needed a crayon to color the sun.
Yo mama'steeth so yellow, when she smiles, people start singing, "I got sunshine, on a
cloudy day...".
Yo mama's breath so bad, when she yawns, her teeth yell, "DUCK!"
Yo mama's breath so bad, when she stuck out her tougue, it was on a stretcher.
Yo mama's breath so bad, her gums went on strike.
Yo mama's breath so bad, she needs a Tic Tac with batteries in it.
Yo mama's breath so bad, people look forward to her farts.
Yo mama's lips so big, Chapstick had to invent a spray.
Yo mama's strong ... then again, smell ain't everything.
Yo mama's arms so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear.
Yo mama's missing a finger and can't count past nine.
Yo mama's got a head so small, she uses a teabag for a pillow.
Yo mama's got one leg shorter than the other and they call her Hip-Hop.
Yo mama's in a wheelchair, screaming, "I AIN'T STANDING FOR THIS!"
Yo mama's only got one leg and telling everyone to get off on the right foot.
Yo mama's got one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama's got one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama's got no fingers and a banjo.
Yo mama's got no ears, but she still says, "I hear ya!".
Yo mama's got green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama's got a bald head with a part and sideburns.
Yo mama's has no neck and they call her Head and Shoulders.
Yo mama's has only two fingers and she's asking people to "gimme five".
Yo mama's has an afro with a chinstrap.
Yo mama's has three teeth; one in her mouth and two in her pocket.
Yo mama's has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.
Yo mama's has one short leg and walks in circles.
Yo mama's has one short arm and can't applaud.
Yo mama's has everything a man can want: muscles, a big chest, and a beard.
Yo mama's like a potato chip -- Fri-to Lay.
Yo mama's like a screen door -- the more I bang her, the looser she gets.
Yo mama's like the Pillsbury Dough Boy -- everyone gets a poke.
Yo mama's like peanut butter -- smooth, creamy, and easy to spread.
Yo mama's makes a great golf course, everyone gets a hole in one.
Yo mama's like shotgun: one cock and she blows.
Yo mama's like a rifle: four cocks and she's loaded.
Yo mama's like a hardware store: four cents a screw.
Yo mama's like Domino's Pizza -- "Something for Nothing".
Yo mama's like a refridgerator, everyone puts their meat in her.
Yo mama's like a bus -- guys climb on and off her all day long.
Yo mama's like a Toyota: "Oh, what a feeling".
Yo mama's like Chinese food -- sweet, sour, and cheap.
Yo mama's like a bowling ball -- you pick her up, shove your fingers into her, throw her
in the gutter and she still comes back
for more.
Yo mama's like a casino: licker in the front, poker in the back.
Yo mama's pussy so dry, even the crabs carry a canteen.
Yo mama so nasty, when she goes to a hair salon, she told the stylist to cut her hair and
she opened up her shirt.
Yo mama so nasty, She gotta put ice down her drawers to keep the crabs fresh!
Yo mama so nasty, she made speed stick slow down.
Yo mama so nasty, she brings crabs to the beach.
Yo mama so nasty,,she made right guard turn left.
Yo mama so nasty, the fishery be paying her to leave.
Yo mama so nasty, she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama so nasty, that her sh*t is glad to escape.
Yo mama so nasty, Ozzie Ozbourne refused to bite her head off.
Yo mama so nasty, I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection.
Yo mama so nasty, lice consider her a great vacation place.
Yo mama so nasty, she was declared quarentine since before she was born
Yo mama so nasty, she joined the four horseman: war, death, famine, disease and Yo
momma
Yo mama so nasty, the bitches teeth look like she got jumped by the Cavity Creeps!!!
Yo mama so nasty, she has two pussys and they both stink.
Yo mama so nasty, she went swimming and now we have the dead sea.
Yo mama so nasty, skunks run from her.
Yo mama so nasty, she had to cut the strings from her tampons to stop her crabs from
bungee jumping.
Yo mamma's so nasty, that her fart was the cause off the disease in the
movie"OUTBREAK"
Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and the bitch died.
Yo mama so old she has Jesus' beeper number!
Yo mama so old her social security number is 1!
Yo mama so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch'
Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
Yo mama so old she owes Jesus 3 bucks!
Yo mama so old she's in Jesus's yearbook!
Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it.
Yo mama so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs.
Yo mama so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.
Yo mama so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.
Yo mama so old and old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said, "Li'l Mary
will never amount to anything".
Yo mama so old she was Jesus Wet Nurse
Yo mama so old shes blind from the big bang
Yo mama so old even God calls her mother!
Yo mama's so poor, when as I walked out of her apartment the rat tripped me and the
roach stole my wallet.
Yo mama is so poor, she can't pay attention.
Yo mama's so poor, I went in to the front gate of your house and I tripped out the back
gate.
Yo mama's so poor she chased down the garbage truck with her shopping list.
Yo mama's so poor, when I seen her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she
was doing, she said, "Moving."
Yo mama's so poor, when I ring the doorbell, she has to say, "DING!"
Yo mama's so poor, burglars break into house so they can leave money.
Yo mama's so poor, she can only afford the "Wel" on the "Welcome" mat.
Yo mama's so poor, she waves around a popscicle stick and calls it air-conditioning.
Yo mama's so poor, she's trying to get married so she can get the rice at the wedding.
Yo mama's so poor, I asked her what was for dinner and she popped ME in the oven.
Yo mama's so poor, your TV's got two channels: on and off.
Yo mama's so poor, she eats cereal with a fork so she can save milk.
Yo mama's so poor, when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers.
Yo mama's so poor, they put her face on a foodstamp.
Yo mama's so poor, she used a tumbleweed for a Christmas tree.
Yo mama's so poor, she hangs the toilet paper to dry.
Yo mama's so poor, I saw her trying to put a food stamp into a gumball machine.
Yo mama's so poor, saw her wrestle a squirrel for a peanut.
Yo mama's so poor, you can't kill the roaches in your house, cause they pay half the rent.
Yo mamma's so poor, that, when I stepped on her skateboard, she said "Hey! Why did
you break our family car?!"
Yo mamma's so poor, that if I went to her house for dinner, and when I ask "What's for
dinner?" she would say," Air."
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck-start a Harley!
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch ball!
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck a golf ball through six feet of garden hose
Yo mama so slutty, when she got a new mini skirt, everyone commented on her nice belt!
Yo mama so slutty, she was on the cover of wheaties, with her legs open, and it said
"breakfast of the champs"
Yo mama so slutty, that I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had the
correct change.
Yo mama so slutty, she had her own "Hands across her ass" charity drive
Yo mama so slutty, that when she heard Santa Claus say HO HO HO she thought she was
getting it three times.
Yo mama so slutty, I fucked her and I's a chick!
Yo mama so slutty, she blind and seeing another man.
Yo mama so slutty, John Holmes just looked at her and got AIDS.
Yo mama so slutty, she is known as Homecomming Disease
Yo mama so slutty, she has Trojan written on her gumline. Africa"
Yo mama's so slutty that in sex-ed in Highschool, she was the homework!
Yo mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it doesn't look back.
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly had to get her baby drunk just so she could breastfeedYo mama's so
ugly, when she walked in to Taco Bell
everybody ran for the border! .
Yo mama so ugly her face is closed on weekends!
Yo mama so ugly when she was a kid and played in the sandbox, cats tried to bury her.
Yo mama is so ugly I shot her and I died.
Yo mama so ugly, when she fell off the ugly tree she hit every branch on the way down.
Yo mama so ugly she turned Madusa to stone.
Yo mama so ugly, she scares blind children.
Yo mama is so ugly, yo daddy had to put the mirror inside the medicine cabinet.
Yo mama is so ugly, a freight train took a dirt road to avoid her.
Yo mama is so ugly a train took a dirt road to avoid her.
Yo mama so ugly she makes onions cry.
Yo mama so ugly, her parents fed her with a sling-shot.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was a baby her mom had to get drunk to feed her.
Yo mama is so ugly she made pigs grow wings and fly away.
Yo mama so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone.
Yo mama so ugly they taped "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
Yo mama so ugly her mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play
with her.
Yo mama so ugly her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel
Yo mama so ugly I took her to haunted house and she came out with a job application
Yo mama so ugly I took her to the zoo, guy at the door said "thanks for bringing her back
Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around
her neck
Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mama'said "What a treasure!" and her
father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama so ugly people go as her for Halloween.
Yo mama so ugly she can look up a camel's butt and scare the hump off of it
Yo mama so ugly she could be the poster child for abortion/birth control!
Yo mama so ugly she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
Yo mama so ugly she could scare the moss off a rock!
Yo mama so ugly she has to trick or treat over the phone
Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.
Yo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away.
Yo mama so ugly she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back
Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama so ugly that Yo father takes her to work just so he doesn't have to kiss her
goodbye.
Yo mama so ugly the doctor is still smacking her ass
Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama so ugly the last time she heard a whistle was when she got hit by a train
Yo mama so ugly the psychiatrist makes her lie facedown.
Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower
Yo mama so ugly they know what time she was born, because her face stopped the clock!
Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo mama so ugly they put her face on box of Ex-Lax and sold it empty
Yo mama so ugly when she passes by a bathoom the toilet flushes.
Yo mama so ugly when she sits in the sand the cat tries to bury her.
Yo mama so ugly when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start
screaming.
Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras
Yo mama so ugly when she was born she was put in an incubator with tinted windows
Yo mama so ugly when she was born the doctor smacked everYone.
Yo mama so ugly when she was born, her mama'saw the afterbirth and said "Twins!"
Yo mama so ugly when she was born, the doctor slapped HER mama!
Yo mama so ugly Yo dad first met her at the pound.
Yo mama so ugly You could stick her face in dough and make monster cookies
Yo mama was such an ugly baby that her parents had to feed her with slingshots.
Yo mama's so ugly, that everyone in the whole world said "Nice and scary costume!" to
her!
When Yo mama was born they had to take her out of the trash can cause doctor said
"Throw this shit away!"

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Page Updated Wed Jun 9, 1999 9:26am EDT