Jokes - http://maxpages.com/state/Just_do_it_jokes_A_to

6809 PROGRAMMERS can do it with a BRA
6809 PROGRAMMERS can do it without SEX
A KING does it with his official seal
ABERDONIANS do it sheepishly
ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures
ACCOUNTANTS do it for profit
ACCOUNTANTS do it to the bottom line
ACCOUNTANTS do it with balance
ACCOUNTANTS do it with double entry
ACCY MAJORS do it in numbers
ACROPHOBES get down
ACTIVISTS try to force you to do it their way
ACTORS do it in the limelight
ACTORS do it on camera
ACTORS do it on cue
ACTORS do it on stage
ACTORS play around
ACTORS pretend doing it
ACTUARIES do it in multidisciplined teams
ACTUARIES do it in numbers
ACTUARIES do it to prevent unneccessary losses
ACTUARIES do it with little risk
ACTUARIES do it with mathematicians
ACUPUNCTURISTS do it with a small prick
ADA PROGRAMMERS do it by committee
ADA PROGRAMMERS do it in packages
ADVERTISERS use the "new, improved" method
ADVERTISING MAJORS do it with style
AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it for the heart
AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it in step
AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it until it hurts
AEROSPACE ENGINEERS do it with lift and thrust
AGENTS do it undercover
AGNOSTICS can't imagine doing it
AGNOSTICS do it without comprehension
AI HACKERS do it artificially
AI HACKERS do it breadth first
AI HACKERS do it depth first
AI HACKERS do it iteratively
AI HACKERS do it robotically
AI HACKERS do it with expertese
AI HACKERS do it with robots
AI HACKERS do it with rules
AI HACKERS make a big production out of it
AI PEOPLE do it with a Lis(ss)p
AIR COURIERS do it all over the world in big jets {01}
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it by radar
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it in the dark
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it with their tongue
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS tell pilots how to do it
AIRLIFTERS penetrate further, linger longer, and drop a bigger load
AIRLINE PILOTS do it at incredible heights
ALCOHOLICS do it bottles
ALEXANDER PORTNOY does it alone
ALGEBRAISTS do it with homomorphisms
ALGOL 68 PROGRAMMERS do it od
ALGOL PROGRAMMERS block it out
ALGORITHMIC ANALYSTS do it with a combinatorial explosion
ALPINISTS do it higher
ALVIN TOFFLER will do it in the future
AM DISC JOCKEYS do it with Modulated Amplitude
AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker
AMERICA finds it at Waldenbooks
AMERICANS do it patriotically
ANAESTHETISTS do it until you fall asleep
ANALOG HACKERS do it continuously
ANARCHISTS do it revoltingly
ANESTHETISTS do it painlessly
ANGLERS do it with worms
ANGLERS do it on riverbanks
ANIMAL BREEDERS do it with frequency and variation
ANIMATORS do it 24 times a second {02}
ANIMATORS do it in real time
ANNOUNCERS broadcast
ANSI does it in the standard way
ANTHROPOLOGISTS do it with culture
APL PROGRAMMERS are functional
APL PROGRAMMERS do it backwards
APL PROGRAMMERS do it in a line
APL PROGRAMMERS do it with glyphs
APL PROGRAMMERS do it with style
APOLOGISTS do it orally
APPLE NEWTON users hold it in their hands
ARCHEOLOGISTS do it in the dirt
ARCHEOLOGISTS do it until they're ruined
ARCHEOLOGISTS do it with mummies
ARCHEOLOGISTS like it old
ARCHEOLOGISTS search for hidden bones
ARCHERS use longer shafts
ARCHITECTS are responsible for the tallest erections
ARCHITECTS do it late
ARCHITECTS have great plans
ARCHITECTURAL HISTORIANS can tell you who put it up, how big it was -
- and why it's no longer standing
ARCHITECTURE MAJORS stay up all night
ARCHIVISTS preserve it for posterity
ARLO GUTHRIE does it on his motorcycle
ARMOURS guns penetrate further
ARSONIST do it with fire
ARSONISTS do it with matches
ART HISTORIANS can tell you who did it, where they did it, what they used and -
- how they did it, but shudder at the possibility of doing it themselves
ARTILLERYMEN do it with a burst
ARTISTS are exhibitionists
ARTISTS do it by design
ARTISTS do it expressively
ARTISTS do it in the buff
ARTISTS do it with creativity
ARTISTS do it with emotion
ARTISTS do it with flair
ASSASSINS do it from behind
ASSASSINS do it stealthily
ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS do it one-to-one
ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS do it a bit at a time
ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS do it byte by byte
ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS do it in hex
ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS know all the right movs
ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over
ASTRONAUTS do it in orbit
ASTRONAUTS do it in weightlessness
ASTRONAUTS do it on the moon
ASTRONAUTS do it while spaced out
ASTRONOMERS can't do it with the lights on
ASTRONOMERS do it all night
ASTRONOMERS do it all over the universe
ASTRONOMERS do it from light-years away
ASTRONOMERS do it in the dark
ASTRONOMERS do it only at night
ASTRONOMERS do it under the stars
ASTRONOMERS do it whenever they can find a hole in the clouds
ASTRONOMERS do it while gazing at Uranus
ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus
ASTRONOMERS do it with all the stars
ASTRONOMERS do it with big bang
ASTRONOMERS do it with heavenly bodies
ASTRONOMERS do it with larger apertures
ASTRONOMERS do it with long tubes
ASTRONOMERS do it with stars
ASTRONOMERS do it with their telescopes
ASTROPHYSICISTS do it with a Big Bang
ASTROPHYSICISTS do it with a big bang
AT&T does it in long lines
ATHEISTS do it without guilt
ATTORNEYS make better motions
AUDIOLOGISTS do it aurally
AUDITORS like to examine figures
AUSTRALIANS do it down under
AUTHORS do it by rote
AUTHORS do it by the book
AUTO MAKERS do it with optional equipment
AUTO MAKERS do it with standard equipment
AUTO MECHANICS do it under hoods, using oil and grease
AUTOMATION PROGRAMMERS do it for you
BABIES do it in their pants
BABYSITTERS charge by the hour
BACH did it with the organ
BAILIFFS always come to order
BAKERS do it for the dough
BAKERS knead it daily
BAKERS let it rise
BAKERS serve up sticky buns
BALLERINAS do it en point
BALLET DANCERS do it on tip-toe
BALLET DANCERS do it with toes
BANANA PICKERS do it in bunches
BANANAS do it in bunches
BAND MEMBERS do it all night
BAND MEMBERS do it in a parade
BAND MEMBERS do it in front of 100,000 people
BAND MEMBERS do it in public
BAND MEMBERS do it in sectionals
BAND MEMBERS do it on the football field
BAND MEMBERS do it with rhythm
BAND MEMBERS do it with their instruments
BAND MEMBERS play all night
BANJO PLAYERS pluck with a stiff pick
BANKERS do it for money, but there is a penalty for early withdrawal
BANKERS do it with interest, but pay for early withdrawl
BANKERS have bigger assets
BANKERS like big deposits
BAPTISTS do it under water
BARBARIANS do it with anything
BARBERS do it and end up with soaping hair
BARBERS do it with Brylcreem
BARBERS do it with shear pleasure
BARNEY does it with children
BARTENDERS do it on the rocks
BASEBALL CARD COLLECTORS do it Topps
BASEBALL PLAYERS do it for a lot of money
BASEBALL PLAYERS do it head first
BASEBALL PLAYERS do it in series
BASEBALL PLAYERS do it in teams
BASEBALL PLAYERS do it with their bats
BASEBALL PLAYERS hit more home runs
BASEBALL PLAYERS make it to first base
BASIC PROGRAMMERS GOTO it
BASIC PROGRAMMERS do it all over the place
BASIC PROGRAMMERS do it by the number
BASKET BALL players do it through hoops
BASKETBALL PLAYERS score more often
BASS CLARINETS go deep
BASS CLARINETS put it between their legs and blow
BASS PLAYERS do it with something big and brown
BASS PLAYERS just pluck at
BASS PLAYERS just pluck at it
BASS TROMBONISTS have bigger 'bones
BASSISTS do it with their fingers
BATMAN does it with Robin
BAYSEIANS probably do it
BEEKEEPERS do it with hives
BEEKEEPERS like to eat their honey
BEER BREWERS do it with more hops
BEER DRINKERS get more head
BEETHOVEN did it apassionately
BEETHOVEN was the first to do it with a full orchestra
BELL LABS PROGRAMMERS do it with UNIX
BELL-RINGERS pull it themselves
BETA TESTERS do it looking for mistakes
BICYCLISTS do it off the road
BICYCLISTS do it with 10 speeds
BIKERS do it on wheels
BIOLOGISTS do it with clones
BIOMEDICAL ENGINEERS do it with artificial limbs
BIRDERS do it in the bush
BIRDS do it, bees do it, even chimpanzees do it
BISEXUAL WELSHMEN do it with cows *and* sheep
BLACKJACK players do it double down
BLONDES do it with a thermos {03}
BLUE ANGELS do it in tight formation {04}
BO JACKSON knows doing it
BOARDHEADS do it with stiff masts
BOBBITT used to do it
BODYBUILDERS do it with muscle
BODYBUILDERS pump it up
BOOKKEEPERS are well balanced
BOOKKEEPERS do it for the record
BOOKKEEPERS do it with double entry
BOOKWORMS only read about it
BOOZERS do it bottoms up
BOSSES delegate the task to others
BOUNCERS have more ejections
BOWLERS do it in the alley
BOWLERS do it with three fingers
BOWLERS have bigger balls
BOXERS do it with fists
BOXERS do it with their gloves on
BOY SCOUTS do it in the woods
BOY SCOUTS do it in troops
BOY SCOUTS do it with Brownies
BOY SCOUTS do it with sticks
BRANCH DAVIDIANS do it with fire
BREASTSTROKERS have better hip action
BRIAN does it conservatively
BRIAN heads the Conservative Party
BRICKLAYERS lay all day
BRIDGE PLAYERS do it with finesse
BRIDGE PLAYERS don't need a partner, if they have a good hand
BRIDGE PLAYERS try to get a rubber
BUDDHISTS imagine doing it
BUGS BUNNY does it with carrots
BUILDING INSPECTORS do it under the table
BURGLARS do it without protection
BUS DRIVERS come early and pull out on time
BUS DRIVERS do it in transit
BUSINESSMEN screw you the best they can
BUTCHERS have better meat
C PROGRAMMERS SWITCH and then BREAK it
C PROGRAMMERS SWITCH often
C PROGRAMMERS continue it
C PROGRAMMERS do it with pointers
C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with "OOP, there it is!"
C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with class
C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with private members and public objects
C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with their friends, in private
CADAVERS do it six feet under
CADAVERS do it stiffly
CADAVERS do it under wraps
CADAVERS do it with their eyes closed
CALCULUS MAJORS do it in increments
CALCULUS STUDENTS do it by parts
CALIFORNIANS do it laid back
CAMELS do it with props (Sopworth Camel was aeroplane with a propeller)
CAMPERS do it in a tent
CANADIANS do it bilingually
CANADIANS do it in English and French
CAPTAIN KIRK does it where no man has gone before
CAR CUSTOMISERS do it with a hot rod
CAR MECHANICS jack it
CARDIOLOGISTS do it halfheartedly
CARDIOLOGISTS do it lightheartedly
CARDIOLOGISTS do it wholeheartedly
CARPENTERS do it tongue-in-groove
CARPENTERS hammer it harder
CARPENTERS nail harder
CARPET FITTERS do it on their knees
CARPET LAYERS do it on the floor
CARTOONISTS do it with just a few good strokes
CATHOLICS do it a lot
CATHOLICS talk about it afterwards
CAVALIERS do it mounted
CAVERS do it in the mud
CAVERS do it underground
CBers do it on the air
CELLISTS give better hand jobs
CEOs do it at conventions
CEOs do it in conference rooms
CEOs do it to the rest of the company
CHARLES does it royally
CHEAPSKATES pay less for it
CHEERLEADERS do it between periods
CHEERLEADERS do it enthusiastically
CHEERLEADERS do it with more enthusiasm
CHEERLEADERS do it with pom-poms
CHEFS do it for dessert
CHEFS do it in the kitchen
CHEFS do it with spice
CHEMICAL ENGINEERS do it in packed beds
CHEMICAL ENGINEERS do it under a fume hood
CHEMISTS do it in an excited state
CHEMISTS do it in test tubes
CHEMISTS do it in the fume hood
CHEMISTS do it organically
CHEMISTS do it periodically on table
CHEMISTS do it reactively
CHEMISTS do it with pipettes
CHEMISTS like to experiment
CHESS PLAYERS check their mates
CHESS PLAYERS do it in their minds
CHESS PLAYERS do it pushing wood
CHESS PLAYERS do it with knights/kings/queens/bishops/mates
CHESS PLAYERS make better mates
CHESS PLAYERS mate better
CHIEFS do it with tradition
CHIROPRACTORS do it by manipulation
CHIROPRACTORS do it, but they X-ray it first
CHOIR BOYS do it unaccompanied
CHRISTIANS do it with amazing grac
CHROMATOGRAPHERS do it with packed columns
CIRCUIT DESIGNERS have a very low rise time
CIRCUIT DESIGNERS offer VLSI {05}
CITY PLANNERS do it with their eyes shut
CITY STREET REPAIRMEN do it with three supervisors watching
CIVIL ENGINEERS build large erections with rigid members
CIVIL ENGINEERS do it by reinforcing it
CIVIL ENGINEERS do it in the dirt
CIVIL ENGINEERS do it in the soil {06}
CIVIL ENGINEERS do it with an erection
CIVIL ENGINEERS do it with their bridges (britches) up
CIVIL ENGINEERS don't just do it, they give a dam
CIVIL ENGINEERS have been doing it as long as there has been dirt and -
- they are STEEL doing it
CLARINETS do it by sucking and blowing
CLARINETS squeak when they do it
CLERICS do it with their gods
CLIMBERS do it in harnesses
CLIMBERS do it on a high
CLIMBERS do it on rope
CLIMBERS do it up thin cracks
CLIMBERS do it with dangling nuts {07}
CLIMBERS do it with their friends
CLIMBERS do it with their hands
CLINTON does it to us
CLOCK MAKERS do it mechanically
CLOWNS do it for laughs
CLUSTER ANALYSTS do it in groups
COACHES whistle while they work
COBOL HACKERS do it by committee
COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it very slow
COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs
COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with reams (of papaer)
COCKROACHES have done it for millions of years, without apparent ill-effects
COCKTAIL WAITRESSES serve highballs
COIN COLLECTORS do it in all denominations
COLLECTORS do it in sets
COLONEL SANDERS does it, and then licks his fingers
COLONEL SANDERS does it, then licks his fingers
COMEDIANS do it for laughs
COMMANDO'S do it for the insertion
COMMODITIES TRADERS do it in the pits
COMMUNICATIONS ENGINEERS do it 'til it Hertz
COMMUNICATORS do it long distance
COMMUNICATORS talk about it
COMMUNISTS do it without class
COMPLEXITY FREAKS do it with minimum space
COMPOSERS do it by numbers
COMPOSERS do it with a quill and a staff
COMPOSERS do it with entire orchestras
COMPOSERS leave it unfinished
COMPUTER ENGINEERS do it with minimum delay
COMPUTER GAME PLAYERS just can't stop
COMPUTER NERDS just simulate it
COMPUTER OPERATORS do it upon mount requests
COMPUTER OPERATORS get the most out of their software
COMPUTER OPERATORS peek before they poke
COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it bit by bit
COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it interactively
COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it logically
COMPUTER SCIENCE students do it with hard drives
COMPUTER SCIENTISTS do it bit by bit
COMPUTER SCIENTISTS do it on command
COMPUTER SCIENTISTS simulate doing it
COMPUTERS do it in ASCII, except IBM's which use EBCDIC
CONDUCTORS do it rhythmically
CONDUCTORS do it with 12 to 16-inch sticks
CONDUCTORS do it with the orchestras
CONDUCTORS wave it up and down
CONFECTIONERS do it sweetly
CONGREGATIONALISTS do it in groups
CONGRESSMEN do it in the House
CONSERVATIVES do it right
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS do it higher
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS lay a better foundation
CONSULTANTS tell others how to do it
CONTRABASS CLARINETS go deeper
COOKS do it with grease and a lot of heat
COOKS do it with oil, sugar and salt
COPIER REPAIRMEN do it with duplicity
COPS do it arrestingly
COPS do it at gun-point
COPS do it by the book
COPS do it with cuffs
COPS do it with electric rods
COPS do it with nightsticks
COPS have bigger guns
COSMOLOGISTS do it with a Bang
COWBOYS handle anything horny
COWGIRLS like to ride bareback
COWS do it in leather
CRANE OPERATORS have swinging balls
CREDIT MANAGERS always collect
CROSS-WORD PLAYERS do it crossly
CROSSCOUNTRY RUNNERS do it in open fields
CRYONICISTS stay stiff longer
CRYPTOGRAPHERS do it secretly
CS111 STUDENTS do it in binary
CS111 STUDENTS do it with ORGs
CS111 STUDENTS do it with interspersed comments
CUB SCOUTS do it in packs
CUBANS do it with cigars
CUCKOOS do it by proxy
CURCUIT DESIGNERS do it with silicon
CURCUIT DESIGNES do it with wires
CYNICS do it critically
DAN QUAYLE doe it
DAN QUAYLE does it in the dark
DAN QUAYLE would do it, if he could find anybody to do it with.
DANCERS do it in leaps and bounds
DANCERS do it on the floor
DANCERS do it to music
DANCERS do it with grace
DANCERS do it with pumps
DANCERS do it with their high heels on
DARK HORSES do it come-from-behind
DATA PROCESSORS do it in batches
DATA does it from memory. STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
DB PEOPLE do it with persistence
DEADBEATS do it without paying for it
DEADHEADS do it with Jerry
DEBATORS do it in their briefs
DEEJAYS can turn your dial
DEEP-SEA DIVERS do it under extreme pressure
DEER HUNTERS will do anything for a buck
DELIVERY MEN do it at the rear entrance
DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it and make you pay for it later
DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it underwater
DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it until they can't remember
DEMOCRATS do it to rich people
DEMOLITIONS EXPERTS do it till they explode
DEMONSTRATERS do it on the street
DENTAL HYGENISTS do it till it hurts
DENTISTS do it in your mouth
DENTISTS do it orally
DENTISTS do it prophylactically
DENTISTS do it with drills and on chairs
DENTISTS do it with filling
DEPROGRAMMERS do it wid de computers
DEPROGRAMMERS do it with sects
DETECTIVES do it under cover
DIETICIANS eat better
DIGITAL HACKERS do it off and on
DIRECT MAILERS get it in the sack
DISCOVER (TM) gives you cash back
DISPATCHERS do it with frequency
DITCH DIGGERS do it in a damp hole
DITCH DIGGERS do it in the dirt
DIVERS do it deeper
DIVERS do it for a score
DIVERS do it in rubber suits
DIVERS do it in three positions {08}
DIVERS do it underwater
DIVERS do it with a buddy
DIVERS do it with a twist
DIVERS go down alot
DJs do it on request
DJs do it on the air
DOCTOR CRUSHER scans it first. STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
DOCTORS do it in the OR
DOCTORS do it on call
DOCTORS do it with injection
DOCTORS do it with patience
DOCTORS do it with pills
DOCTORS prescribe it
DOCTORS take two aspirin and do it in the morning
DOMINOS does it in 30 minutes or less
DON'T do it with a BANKER; most of them are tellers
DONERS do it for life {09}
DOS PROGRAMMERS can do it in a box (OS/2 1.3)
DOS USERS do it with cryptic, old-fashioned commands -
- UNIX programmers just do it cryptically
DRAMA STUDENTS do it for applause
DRAMA STUDENTS do it with an audience
DREAMERS do it perfectly
DRIVERS do it with their cars
DRUG DEALERS avoid big busts
DRUGGISTS fill your prescription
DRUIDS do it in the bushes
DRUIDS do it naturally
DRUIDS do it with animals
DRUIDS leave no trace
DRUMMERS always have hard sticks
DRUMMERS beat it
DRUMMERS do it in 4/4 time
DRUMMERS do it longer
DRUMMERS do it louder
DRUMMERS do it with a better beat
DRUMMERS do it with both hands and feet
DRUMMERS do it with great rhythm
DRUMMERS do it with rhythm
DRUMMERS do it with their wrists
DRUMMERS have faster hands
DRUMMERS pound it
DRUNKS do it all over their shoes.
DRYCLEANERS do it in an hour
DRYWALLERS are better bangers
DUNGEON MASTERS do it any way they feel like
DUNGEON MASTERS do it anywhere they damn well please
DUNGEON MASTERS do it behind a screen
DUNGEON MASTERS do it in ways contrary to the laws of physics
DUNGEON MASTERS do it to you real good
DUNGEON MASTERS do it whether you like it or not
DUNGEON MASTERS do it with dice
DUNGEON MASTERS have better encounters
DYSLEXIC NURSES do it with hypodemic noodles
DYSLEXIC PARTICLE PHYSICISTS do it with hadrons
DYSLEXICS od ti

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Page Updated Sat Jun 5, 1999 9:48pm EDT