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Quotes
Duck in a Convenience Store
Is Santa A Woman
Santas Bad Day
Twas Two Weeks Past Elections
The Twelve Recounts of Christm
SCARED
FOUR YEARS LATER
The Best Penguin Joke Ever
New Yorkers In Heaven
The Night Before Christmas
Why Did The Chicken Cross The
Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas
BREAKING NEWS GOD OVERRULES S
Spanish Delight
Bubba Claus Is Coming To Town
Chocolate
Mistletoe at the Airport
Sayings
The Job Interview
BOb
Live On The Sun
Accidents Happen
Duel
TORN LIGAMENTS
Misinformation
Kitten From Heaven
ORGANIC VEGETABLES
Harry Potter
Smile
Nope
Mad Dash
The Portrait
Sick Vet
The Golfer
A Holy Refund
After Surgery
Behind Great Men
Exerciseis it worth it
Ahhhhh Teenagers
Funny
Steak
Pneumonia
untittled
The Cat
Some points to ponder
Getting Old
Money
Forgive Me Father For I Have
To Die For
A new version of the Good th
The Mirror
Funny Captains
Congress
A LETTER FROM A REDNECK MOTHER
Blonde Painting A Porch
A joke to start your Monday of
Elway and OJ
Do you know what Easter is
Doctors Orders
Clintons Favorite Things
Blonde at the Appliance Store
Blonde Counting Sheep
IrishmanDrunk and Falling Down
Titanic vs Clinton
Blonde with Chickens
TGIF vs SHIT
RedNeck Hunting
Dumb Blond
Daddy Mommy the Policeman an
Really Annoy People
The Nursing Home
Smart Teachers
Three Embarrassing Moments
Football Broadcast
The Three Stars
Beautiful
Things you would never know wi
Whos Marylou
Actual instruction labels
Holy Moses
George W Bush was thrilled
Dont give up
Racing animals
Golf balls
Car trouble
TheOJMurderTrialby Drseuss
Top10 things not to tell a cop
Bubba Died in a Fire
Baseball Heaven
TOP 10 REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEB
Giants vs Ravens
Icy Blonde
Hot as Hell
Rocker and NY
Yankee fans on train
Bushs Winning Campaign Slogan
Clintons Clock
Things Found Only in America
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| Really Annoy People |
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| Here are some ways to annoy people big time.... Sing the Batman theme incessantly. Specify that your drive thru order is "to go". Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip..." If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. Speak only in a "robot" voice. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announcing its your property. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles. Name your dog "Dog". Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up". Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think!" Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace". Forget the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot". Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol. Practice making fax and modem noises. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and copy them to your boss. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid looking ignorant. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person". Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy." Wear a special hip holster for your remote control. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice. To really annoy people, stand on a street corner, pointing a hair drier at passing traffic, and watch it slow down. Holler random numbers while someone is counting. Take a sock puppet to dinner with you. When the waiter comes to ask you what you want, consult the sock. When the check comes argue with the sock loud enough so everyone can hear you about who will pay the bill, throw him down and say "Fine, you pay!" then leave. Give your friends the gift of laughter! |
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