One day a redneck was driving home from work when his truck broke down. So he popped the hood and said to himself, "If I had a monkey wrench I could fix this." He walked down the street to a neighboring house and he sees an old lady sitting on the porch with all her kids playing in the yard. He asked her (in redneck slang), "Do you have a monkey wrench?".
She said, "What did you say?". So he asked again, "Do you have a monkey wrench?"
She screamed, "Shut up, youngins! I can't hear what this man is trying to say!" Again, she asked, "What did you say?", and again he asked, "Do you have a monkey wrench?"
She replied, "No sir, this ain't no monkey ranch this is a day care."
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