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NEWS / EDITORIALS
ITS EMMY TIME AGAINA NEW SOUTH PARK SINGLEHAPPY THIRD BIRTHDAYVIDEO GAMES
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SOUTH PARK MOVIE POSTERSTAN MARSHSOUTH PARK KIDSCHEFMR HANKEYMEPHISTO AND KEVINSHEILA BROSLOFSKIERIC CARTMANKENNY MCORMICKKYLE BROSLOFSKIVIEW ALL OF OUR PICTURESMR GARRISONKENNY PLATYPUSSTAN DRESSED AS RAGGEDY ANDYORIGINAL STUFF
TEST YOUR SOUTH PARK SKILLSWHY KYLES MOM IS SO ARROGANTSPINOFFSWHAT BECAME OF SP CHARACTERSKYLES LESSON OF THE WEEKSCRIPTS BY MEEPISODES
EPISODE REVIEWSCHARACTERSKENNYS DEATHSUPCOMING SOUTH PARK EPISODESLINES FROM MOVIESCENSORSHIPSPN FAVORITE EPISODESSOUTH PARK CDS
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THE SOUTH PARK MOVIETHE CAST OF SOUTH PARKSP CHARACTERS BASED ON PEOPLEWEBMASTERS
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| CARTMAN'S PARTY BY PAT OPENING THEME SONG PERFORMED BY LES CLAYPOOL OF PRIMUS [OPENING : STAN'S HOUSE . GRANPA MARSH , STAN , RANDY AND SHARON , AND SHELLEY ARE SITTING AROUND WATCHING "JESUS AND PALS" ] STAN : MA , CAN'T WE WATCH TERRENCE AND PHILIP INSTEAD ? SHARON : NO , HONEY , I TOLD U ABOUT THAT SHOW BEFORE , IT'S NOT APPROPIATE FOR THIS HOUSE ! STAN : DAMN ! SHARON : LANGUAGE ! STAN : CAN I CALL SOMEONE ? RANDY : IT'S GETTING KINDA LATE , STANLEY , MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T . STAN : PLEASE ! SHARON : OK , BUT HURRY UP . [CUT TO KITCHEN , STAN CALLS KYLE ] KYLE : HELLO ? STAN : HI KYLE : OH HI DUDE , WHAT'S UP ? STAN : NOTHING , I CAN'T WAIT FOR SATURDAY ! KYLE : WHY , WHAT'S SATURDAY ? STAN : MY BIRTHDAY ! KYLE : SWEET , R U HAVING A PARTY ? STAN : I DON'T KNOW , MY MOM HASN'T SAID ANYTHING YET . KYLE : WAIT A MINUTE , SOMEBODY IS ON THE OTHER LINE . [KYLE PRESSES A BUTTON ON THE PHONE AND HEARS CARTMAN'S VOICE] CARTMAN : HI DUDE ! KYLE : HEY FAT ASS , WHAT'S UP ? CARTMAN : AYYY ! I'M NOT FAT , JEW ! KYLE : ALRIGHT , WHAT DO U WANT ? CARTMAN : IS STAN'S PARTY THIS WEEK , WHY HAVEN'T I BEEN INVITED ? KYLE : I DUNNO , ASK HIM . [KYLE PRESSES A BUTTON AND STAN IS IN THE CONVERSATION] STAN : HI DUDES , WHATS UP ? CARTMAN : WHY THE HELL HAVEN'T I BEEN INVITED TO UR BIRTHDAY ? STAN : WELL-------------- CARTMAN : ALRIGHT , THAT DOES IT , I HAVEN'T MY OWN PARTY AND IT'S GONNA BE THE BEST EVER ! KYLE : OH YA CARTMAN : YA STAN : OH YA CARTMAN : YA KYLE : WELL FINE STAN : WELL FINE ! CARTMAN : SCREW U GUYS , I'M GOING HOME ! [HANGS UP PHONE] [WE HEAR CARTMAN IN THE BACKGROUND YELLING TO HIS MOTHER] CARTMAN : MAAAAAAMMM , CAN WE HAVE A BIG PARTY THIS WEEKEND ? LIANNE : WELL , HOW ABOUT NEXT WEEKEND , DEAR ! CARTMAN : BUT MMMMMMAAAAAAAAAMMM , I WANNA HAVE A PARTY SO I CAN BE COOL ! LIANNE : WELL HON , I WOULD BUT ....... CARTMAN : BUT MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMM , I WANNA HAVE A PARTY SO I CAN BE COOL ! LIANNE : WELL OK , DEAR ! CARTMAN : SWEET ! [CUT TO COMMERCIAL] [CUT TO MR. GARRISON'S CLASS , CARTMAN IS GIVING OUT INVITATIONS] CARTMAN : AND HERE IS ONE FOR U BEBE , AND U WENDY , AND U BUTTERS , AND U CLYDE , AND U CRAIG KYLE : FAT ASS , HOW'S UR PARTY COMING ALONG CARTMAN : WELL GREAT CUZ U TWO AIN'T COMING , AND HERE'S ONE FOR U KENNY AND U TOKEN AND... KYLE : YA , WELL WE DON'T CARE STAN : I'M REAL MAD ! KYLE : Y , DUDE ? STAN : I THINK MY PARENTS HATE ME , THEY DIDN'T REMEMBER MY BIRTHDAY ! KYLE : WOW DUDE , THAT SUX ! STAN : YA I KNOW . [CUT TO CAFETERIA] KIDS : HEY CHEF ! CHEF : HELLO CHILDREN , HOW'S EVERYTHING ? KIDS : GOOD ! STAN : BAD ! CHEF : WHY BAD , STAN ? STAN : MY PARENTS FORGOT MY BIRTHDAY ! CHEF : WOW , THEY'RE BAD PARENTS ! STAN : YA I KNOW ! KYLE : WHY DON'T U MOVE TO MY EXTRA BEDROOM ? STAN : FINE , IT'S PROBABLY BETTER THAN MY HOUSE CARTMAN : HEY CHEF , WANNA COME TO MY PARTY ? CHEF : WELL , WILL THERE BE ANY HOT CHICKS THERE ? CARTMAN : MAYBE KENNY : MRPH MPRHMPHRMPHR MPRHRMPHRM MPHR MPHR MPRHMPHRMPHR MPHRHMPHR MPHRMPHR MRPH ! KYLE : SICK KENNY ! CARTMAN : WHY WOULD HE DO THAT IN MY HOUSE ? [CUT TO KYLE'S EXTRA BEDROOM WHERE STAN IS MOVING IN] SHEILA BROVLOFSKI : NOW KYLE , R U SURE STAN'S MOTHER WANTS TO STAY HERE FOR A COUPLE WEEKS ? KYLE : YA I .............. STAN : MY FAMILY GOT DEPORTED TO INDIA ! SHEILA : O WELL I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT [CUT TO CARTMAN'S HOUSE , LIANNE IS DECROATING WHILE CARTMAN IS EATING CHEESY POOFS AND WATCHING TV] CARTMAN : I'M HAVING A PARTY , I'M HAVING A PARTY , NEH NEHE NEH NEHE NEHE NEH NEH ! [CUT TO COMMERCIAL ] [CUT BACK TO CARTMAN'S HOUSE PARTY NIGHT] CARTMAN [WITH MICROPHONE] : FIRST OF ALL I WANT TO THANK ALL OF U FOR COMING TO MY PARTY , NOW LET'S START DANCING ! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN , THE ONE AND ONLY CHER ! CHER [FACE PAINTED LIKE A RAINBOW[MAKEUP]]: NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY , U KEEP PUSHING ME INSIDE , AND I CAN'T BREAK THROUGH . THERE'S NO TALKING TO U ! [MUSIC CONTINUES AND EVERYONE STARES AT EACHOTHER ] MR. GARRISON : WHAT THE HELL KIND OF PARTY IS THIS ? MR. MACKEY : I DUNNO BUT IT SUX , M'KAYYY ? [OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM] CLYDE : LET'S PLAY MONOPOLY ! BUTTERS : I SSSSURE WWWWOULD LIKE TTTTHAT ! TOKEN : YA , LETS PLAY ! TIMMY : TIMMEEEEHHHH ! CARTMAN : COME ON PEOPLE , IT'S A PARTY , DANCE ! CLYDE : TIMMY , GET THE MONOPOLY ! TIMMY : TIMMEHHHHH ! [AS TIMMY RIDES OVER TO GET IT HE RUNS OVER THE PLUG AND ALL THE LIGHTS GO OFF ] CARTMAN : WEAK !!!! [CUT BACK TO KYLE'S EXTRA BEDROOM] KYLE : GEE , I WONDER HOW CARTMAN'S PARTY IS GOING ! STAN : I KNOW , I'M BORED AS HELL ! KYLE : I WOULDN'T STOOP THAT LOW TO GO TO THE PARTY THOUGH ! [THE DOORBELL RINGS AND STAN SEES HIS CAR OUTSIDE THE WINDOW ] STAN : DAMMIT ! [CUT BACK TO CARTMAN'S DARK PARLOR] CARTMAN : KENNY , GO DOWN AND FIX THE FUSE BOX IN THE BASEMENT ! KENNY : MPHR MPHR MPHR MPHR MPHR MPHR MPHR ? CARTMAN : CUZ UR FAMILY'S POOR , KENNY ! KENNY : MPHR MPHR ! CARTMAN : SAME TO U ! [WE HEAR KENNY GO TO THE BASEMENT AND TO THE FUSE BOX . THEN HE FLICKS A SWITCH AND WE SEE HIS SKELETON LIGHT UP .] BEBE : O MY GOD , HE KILLED KENNY ! BUTTERS : U BASTARD ! TIMMY : TIMMEH ! MR. GARRISON : I'M GETTING THE HELL OUT OF THIS PARTY ! MAYOR MCDANIELS : ME TOO ! EVERYBODY : YA ! [THE LIGHTS GO BACK ON TO SHOW CARTMAN , LIANNE , AND CHER SITTING ON THE STAIRS] CARTMAN : REMEMBER DON'T HAVE A PARTY AGAIN ! LIANNE : SURE ERIC ! [CUT BACK TO KYLE'S HOUSE , SHEILA ANSWERS THE DOOR TO SEE RANDY AND SHARON MARSH] SHEILA : RANDY , SHARON ? RANDY AND SHARON : YA ? SHEILA : UR SON TOLD US YOU GOT DEPORTED TO INDIA ! STAN'S PARENTS : HUH ? STAN : HI MOM , HI DAD , WHY THE HELL DID U COME BACK ? STAN'S PARENTS : TO GET U FOR UR BIRTHDAY PARTY , WE WERE WORRIED SICK ABOUT YOU , SON ! STAN : BUT I THOUGHT U FORGOT RANDY : WHY WOULD WE FORGET UR BIRTHDAY , STANLEY ? STAN : CUZ U HATE ME ! SHARON : NO WE DON'T , UR BIRTHDAY ISN'T UNTIL TOMORROW ! STAN : O , ALRIGHT I BETA LEAVE THEN ! KYLE : SEE YA DUDE STAN : BYE ! KYLE : MA , I LEARNED SOMETHING TODAY , I'M DAMN GLAD I DIDN'T GO TO CARTMAN'S PARTY ! [CLOSING SONG BY CHER ] |
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