Q. What do you get if you dial 666?
A. The Australian police!
Q. What do you get if you dial 000?
A. Nothing.
Q. What do you get if you dial 5255124858878847887558?
A. A sore finger!
Q. What bird prepares food?
A. A cook-coo!
Q. What two words have the most letters?
A. Post Office!
Q. How do you spell 'mouse trap' using only three letters?
A. C.A.T.
Q. What's an 'Ig'?
A. An Eskimo's house without a loo.
Q. What do you call a penguin in the Sahara Desert?
A. Lost.
Q. What do you do if the M6 is closed?
A. Drive up the M3 twice!
Q. What goes tick-woof, tick-woof, tick-woof?
A. A watch-dog.
Q. What do you get if you sit under a cow?
A. A pat on the head.
Q. What question can never be answered "yes"?
A. "Are you asleep?"
Q. A man walked into a bar. What did he say?
A. "Ouch."
Q. How many seconds in a year?
A. Twelve. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...
Q. Why was the Egyptian girl worried?
A. Because her daddy was a mummy.
Q. Why are all brides unlucky?
A. Well, they never get to marry the best man, do they?
|