Nasty Jokes - Entertainment - http://maxpages.com/smoochy/Nasty

What's the difference between a blonde & a mosquito? A mosquito quits
> > sucking when you smack it.
> >
> > What's the best thing about a blow job from an Ethiopian woman? You know
> > she'll swallow.
> >
> > How is a pussy like a grapefruit? The best ones squirt when you eat
them.
> >
> > What's the difference between white fairy tales & black fairy tales?
White
> > fairy tales start, "Once upon a time....."; Black fairy tales start,
"Yo,
> > you motherfuckers ain't gonna believe this shit....."
> >
> > What is the biggest problem for an atheist? No one to talk to during
> > orgasm.
> >
> > What's the smartest thing to come out of a woman's mouth? Einstein's
cock.
> >
> > What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass? A
mechanic!
> >
> > What's the difference between acne and a Catholic Priest? Acne will
> > usually
> > not come on a kid's face until around 13 or 14 years of age.
> >
> > Why does the bride always wear white? Because it is good for the
> > dishwasher
> > to match the stove and refrigerator.
> >
> > Why do hunters make the best lovers? Because they go deep in the bush,
> > shoot more than once and they eat what they shoot.
> >
> > Why do Italians wear mustaches? So they can look like their mother.
> >
> > How can you tell which is the head nurse? The one with the dirty knees.
> >
> > What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a
> > positive side.
> >
> > What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and use
a
> > lubricant.
> >
> > A brunette, a blonde and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has the
> > biggest tits? The blonde, because she's 18.
> >
> > How do you tell if a chick's too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants
down
> > & her ass is still in them.
> >
> > Did you hear about the new paint called "Blonde" paint? It's not very
> > bright, but it spreads easy.
> >
> > What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can
> > wash her crack and sell it again!
> >
> > Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When you take it off you
> > wonder where her tits went.
> >
> > Why do men pay more than women for car insurance? Because women don't
get
> > blow jobs while they're driving.
> >
> > What's the difference between Mayonnaise and semen?
> > Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back of a girls throat at thirty miles an
hour.
> >
> > Why is it so hard for women to take a piss in the morning? Did you ever
> > try
> > to peel apart a grilled cheese sandwich?
> >
> > How do you piss off a female archeologist? Give her a used tampon and
ask
> > her what period it comes from.
> >
> > Why are Women's feet shorter than men's feet? So they can stand closer
to
> > the sink.
> >
> > How can you tell a macho women? She rolls her own tampons.
> >
> > Bumper Sticker: Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you're an
asshole.
> >
> > Why did God give men penises? So they'd always have at least one way to
> > shut a woman up!
> >
> > How was Colonel Sanders a typical male? All he cared about were legs,
> > breasts,and thighs!
> >
> >

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Page Updated Sun Jun 27, 1999 11:00pm EDT