 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
Charge It To Da Game
Im A SoldierMama Always Told MeIt Aint My FaultGive Me The WorldMe And YouThrow Yo Hood UpWho I BeDirty J's
Dirty Jokesdirtyest jokesmore dirty jokesDirty J linksFunny Stuff
Brunette JokesYo Momma JokesMarrige JokesMen JokesMusic
RAPRAP AUDIONet Stuff
mIRCOnline GamesSwearing
bitchFuckcunt|
|
| Dirty j0kes |
 |
| This page has got funny jokes! (may affend some of you peeps) |
| ||||||
| Why can't Santa have children? He only comes once a year. ------------------------------------------------------------ Two men and a woman were the sole survivors of a pleasure cruise ship that sank in the Bermuda Triangle. They made it to an uninhabited island. ------------------------------------------------------------ Two weeks later the woman jumped off a cliff because she was so ashamed of what she was doing. Two weeks after that the two men buried her because they were so ashamed of what they were doing. Two more weeks passed by and the men dug her up again--being so ashamed of what they were doing. ------------------------------------------------------------ Three guys standing at the end of the line to get into Heaven are greeted by an angel who tells them they're for sure going to get in, but St. Peter's just too busy to handle the whole line right now so they're gonna have to go back to earth for one month...and they get to choose whatever they want to be during that time. The first guy says, "Well I've always wanted to fly like a bird...so how about making me an eagle?" "Certainly," says the angel, and the first man disappears in a puff of smoke. The second guy tells the angel that he's always wanted to be famous, with a huge following of admirers, and...poof! "Granted," says the angel. The third guy says (in a lowered voice)..."You know, I've always wondered what it would be like to be a really incredible stud...if you catch my meaning"...poof! The month passes and St. Peter sends the angel to earth to bring back the three men. Two...three weeks go by and St. Peter's beginning to wonder where they are. A month later the angel shows up with the three men and St. Peter asks about the big delay... "Well, the first guy wasn't hard to find: I went straight to the open plains of Midwest America and found him soaring through a canyon. The second guy was easy enough to find: I went to Hollywood and found him living it up as a popular movie star. But the third guy--I looked, and I looked, high and low; when I was just about to give up the search...I found him nailed inside the wall of a new apartment building outside Detroit." ------------------------------------------------------------ A little boy gets up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. As he passes his parent's bedroom he peeks in through the keyhole. He watches for a moment, then continues on down the hallway, saying to himself, "Boy, and she gets mad at me for sucking my thumb" ------------------------------------------------------------ Today, the world was stunned by the news of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occured at aproximately 8:42 pm last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept going, and going, and going, "pinkie," as he was known to his freinds and relatives, was alone at his death.An emergency autopsy was performed early this morning. Chief Medical Examiner Dura cell concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Apparently, someone had installed Mr. Bunny's batteries backwards; and he kept coming, and coming, and coming... ------------------------------------------------------------ A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog peed on his leg. He reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog. A passer-by who'd seen everything remarked: "That's very tolerant of you after what he just did." "Not really," came the reply. "I'm just finding out where his mouth is, so I can kick him in the nuts." ------------------------------------------------------------ Ray's tennis elbow had been killing him, so when he was passing by thedoctor's office one day, he decided to stop in. The nurse told him he couldsee the doctor in twenty minutes, but first he had to provide a urine sample. Ray told her that was absurd for an elbow examination, but she insisted. Finally, he agreed. Later, he was ushered in to see the doctor, who said, "That tennis elbow isreally acting up, huh?" "The nurse told you, then?" Ray asked. "No," the doctor replied. "It's the urinalysis." He explained that he'd purchased a new machine thatcould diagnose absolutely every physical condition with total accuracy. Themachine cost a fortune, but it cut down on his work so much that he was ableto get out on the golf course at three every afternoon. Ray didn't believe a word. However, he did agree to provide another urinesample when he came back in for another checkup. Two weeks later, Ray was sitting at the breakfast table talking with hiswife about the ridiculous machine. They decided to have some fun with the doctor. Ray peed in the bottle, and so did his wife and teenage daughter. Then, as he opened the garage door, Ray had another idea. He put a few drops of crankcase oil from his car in the bottle, and thenbeat off and added a few more drops. Then he shook up the bottle, drove tothe doctor and handed the bottle to the nurse. This time the analysis took an entire hour. When Ray sat down, the doctorlooked at him. "I've got some bad news for you," he said. "Your daughter'spregnant, your wife's got V.D., your car is about to throw a rod, and if youdon't stop beating off, that tennis elbow is never going to heal." ------------------------------------------------------------ What's the difference between a golf ball and awomen's G-spot? A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball. ------------------------------------------------------------ What do a bungee jumper and a gay man have in common? If the rubber breaks, they're both in deep shit! ------------------------------------------------------------ What do you get when you cross LSD with birthcontrol? A trip without the kids ------------------------------------------------------------ Why did God give women nipples? To makesuckers out of men. ------------------------------------------------------------ What are the two greatest lies? "The check is in the mail," and "I promise I won't cum inyour mouth." ------------------------------------------------------------ What do you call a hooker's kids? Brothelsprouts. ------------------------------------------------------------ How do you tell if you are in a gay church? Only half the congregation is kneeling. ------------------------------------------------------------ What's the difference betwwen pink and purple? Your grip ------------------------------------------------------------ What did the pussy say after having sex? Idon't know whats got into me. ------------------------------------------------------------ How did the girl from west virginia know her mother had her period? Her brother's dick tasted like blood ------------------------------------------------------------ Why did the queer get fired from the spermbank? He got caught drinking on the job. ------------------------------------------------------------ What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a blowjob ! ------------------------------------------------------------ What is the only bad thing about the '69'position ? The view. ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------ ---------------------------------- ----------------------- ------------ ------- - ! |
 E-MAIL ME AT -----> ss2003@hotmail.com |
|
. |
| Visitors: 06310 |