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| Please don't answer these questions because, yes, many of them have an explaination, but I don't really want to get a bunch of emails of the answers, sorry. Well, enjoy! Why is abbreviate such a long word? Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? What do you plant to grow a seedless watermelon? Why are they called apartments when they are so close together? Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why is there only one company making the game Monopoly? If I break the laws of Physics, do I go to jail? What would chairs look like if your knees bent the other way? Why do they say new and improved...because how can it be new if it was improved? If someone invented instant water, what would you add? How much money, in pennies, is lying in the streets of the world? If you worked at a fire hydrant plant, where would you park? Why is it that when you see someone in a cast or brace you say "OUCH"? What happens to that other sock that you lost in the laundry? Why is it that when you're at the beach swimming and it starts to rain, everyone gets up and leaves? Why, when a kid is running, will his mother say, "Don't come running to me if you break your leg"? Why do people look up when they think? Why does a serving of frosted flakes have the same number of calories as regular flakes? Why do women wear shoes that hurt their feet? Why is it when you sit around the house you don't actually sit around the house? Why do 10 pounds of groceries generate 50 pounds of garbage? Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the morning? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? If your vehicle is going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM? You know that little indestructible black box used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance? Why is it only a penny for your thoughts when you give your two cents worth? Thermos flasks keep hot things hot and cold things cold...but how do they know? Where do forest rangers go to get away? If this is the land of the free, why is someone always trying to sell me something? If pro is the opposite of con, is congress the opposite of progress? If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from? How did a fool and his money get together? Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? If you choke Smurf, what color does he turn? If its tourist season, why can't I shoot them? Why do they call it a TV set, when there is only one of them? You know how most packages say open here. What's the protocol if it says open somewhere else? "Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?" If you have a bird, when you are reading the newspaper does it wonder why you are staring at carpet? How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink? If a vampire can't see himself in a mirror, why is his hair always so neat? If the police arrest a mime, do they say he has the right to remain silent? What keeps glue from sticking to the inside of the bottle? If a duck goes in the water right after he eats, does he get cramps? Why do they insist that all buildings have directories in braille? How do blind people find the signs?! Why is the Hooked on Phonics number 1-800-abcdefg? How are you supposed to call that if you can't read? Where does the white go when the snow melts? Why do light switches have on and off on them? If the light is on then you know its on, and if the light is off then you can't read it anyway. How big is a jumboshrimp? How big is a smallcrowd? How can you be prettyugly? Who would need to buy a solar-powered flashlight? A loud whisper? What is civil war? If you can plant a tree, why can't you tree a plant? Do they make decaffeinated coffee tables? Why are there seeing eye dog signs? Why is it when you move something in a ship its called cargo but when you move something in a car its called a shipment? A door that's open is called ajar; what is it called when a jar is open? Would you buy a solar-powered flashlight? They call it a hot-water-heater but why would you need to heat hot water? They call it a building but after it's completed shouldn't they call it a built? Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs...shouldn't they wear nightgowns? If vegetarians eat only vegetables, then what do humanitarians eat? If a persons kills their clone, is it murder or suicide? What does the Q in Q-tip stand for? Why are there Interstate highways in Hawaii? You can't get off by driving. Why do they call warm water, luke warm...did someone named Luke discover it? If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter? If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex in the box? Why do they put braille on the number pads of drive-through bank machines? If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan? How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign? What do they use to ship styrofoam? Why is abbreviation such a long word? Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container? Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets? How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes? Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? Does fuzzy logic tickle? Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs? Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics? Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives? If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer? What was the best thing before sliced bread? When sign makers go on strike, is anything painted on their signs? If you hire Dr. Kevorkian to assist with your suicide and you live, can you sue him for malpractice? Peace-keeping MISSILE? And they call it Military INTELLIGENCE? What is another word for thesaurus? If most accidents occur within five miles of the home, why not move ten miles away? Why do they call it quicksand when it sucks you down slowly? Isn't "Big Kid" an oxymoron? If you tickle a cow, will the milk come out its nose? Why is there a "permanent press" setting on an iron? There are 365 days in a year, yet there are 52 weeks consisting of 7 days each, which equals 364 days. Where does that extra day go? Why is it that when you have an umbrella with you, it doesn't rain, but if you don't have one, then it normally does? If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing nightgowns? Why is it that when we bounce a check, the bank charges us more of what they already know we don't have any of? When someone asks you "a penny for your thoughts" and you put your two cents in what happens to the other penny? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say? Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist? Why can't you make another word using all the letters in "anagram"? Why is it that no word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple? How come wrong numbers are never busy? Do people in Australia call the rest of the world "up over"? Does the screwdriver belong to Philip? Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips? Why is it that night falls but day breaks? Why is the third hand on the clock called a second hand? Why is it that when you driving and looking of an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? Do pilots take crash courses? Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers? How can there be self-help "groups"? How do you get off a nonstop flight? How do you write zero in Roman numerals? If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? |
 SelenaSAL@aol.com |
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