Wednsday Night Havok 6-20-01 - Wrestling - http://maxpages.com/rmwfarchives2/6_20_01_Wednsday_Night

" Good evening everyone and welcome to another installment of Wednsday Night Havok!! I am Guy Mandell and here with me as ever is SiD "The King" Nasty. We are coming to you from the Metroplex Civic Arena in downtown Washington DC. "

SiD " Spidey told me this show is going to suck "

Guy " He did not!!! "

SiD " No, he really did "

Guy " Yeah whatever. Anyway, first on tonight's show is our dumpster math with Stalin & Johny Electric "

SiD " A dumpster match.. How friggen lame "

Guy " Yeah well.. Anyway now we're going to switch over to this place's parking lot where our next match'll be held "

SiD " 'This place' has a name you know? "

Guy sighs.

Stalin -vs Johny Electric
Dumpster Match
The camera's switch over to the back lot of the Metroplex Civic Arena where Johny Electric is talking to a man who's wearing a hooded sweat-shirt that is concealing his face.

SiD " Who's that guy?? "

Guy " How should I know?? "

SiD " Cuse you act like you know everything "

On the far side of the parking lot is Stalin. He is sitting on a curb, drinking a bottle of water. A plain clothed ref walks out of the lot's adjacent building and the two wrestlers walk up to him.

Guy " Whatever "

Ref " Okay guys, in case you haven't been filled in, this is a dumpster match. To win you have to get your opponent in one of those dumpsters over there.. "

He points to the dumpsters along side the building's loading dock.

Ref " ..and close the lid. There are no rules to this match other than that you have fifteen minutes to get the other guy in a dumpster "

The ref takes a few steps backward then blows an air horn, signaling the start of the match.

Guy " Alright, that means this match has begun.. The two men lock-up. Johny Electric with a neck-breaker to Stalin.. He stomps him in the chest a few times before the commie rolls away and gets back to his feet "

SiD " Hey you ever know anyone who would just babble endlessy?? "

Guy " Yeah "

SiD " Who goes on and on and on and on without any point to what their saying.. So annoying to the point where you can't or read or write or even think straight??? "

Guy " I said 'Yeah' "

SiD " Yeah.. Well.. It's driving me crazy!!! "

Guy " What are you talking about??? "

SiD " My roommate is just so damn unnerving!!! Can I move in with you Guy??? "

Guy " No way in hell "

SiD groans, " Fine then. Be an asshole "

Guy " Okay, I will. Stalin dropkicks Johny then gives him a fist drop.. Johny rolls clear though and the commie busts his hand on the pavement!!! "

SiD laughs.

Guy " Stalin a bit distracted by his hand's pain doesn't notice Johny coming up behind him.. A hammerlock from JE!!! "

SiD " Hey you think Johny Electric has eletrically powers?? "

Guy " Electrical powers?? "

SiD " Yeah, you know like Electro.. Or that redneck punker kid on the X-Files "

Guy " I doubt it. If he did I'm sure he'd be using them "

SiD " Yeah, I supposed your right. It'd be cool though if he did "

Guy " Whatever you say SiD.. There's Stalin with a piledriver to his opponent!!! he climbs on top of him and slap a figure four leg-lock on!!! JE cries out.. When he is released he give Stalin a left jab, followed by a right hook.. Stalin stumbles back a few steps then gets whipped into the dumpster.. Head first "

SiD " He busted his head open too.. Is he still concious?? "

Guy " I can't tell.. Doesn't matter too much if he is though cause knock outs don't win this kind of match.. You still have to get them in the dumpster and shut it "

SiD " Oh "

Guy " JE picks up Stalin and throws him over the side of the dumpster!!! He pushing at him and.. He has him inside!!! All that's left is to slam the lid and we'll have a winner!!! "

SiD " It's such a shame throwing a perfectly good white boy like that "

Guy " JE closes the dumpster and that's it folks.. This match has a winner "

Winner: Johny Electric
The camera cuts over to Spider-Man sitting in the patten leather hover-chair of his penthouse office, watching Havok on the wall of TVs.

Spidey to the camera " Alright, I know so far this show has been pretty weak. Don't worry though, it shouldn't get any better. "

He sighs and shakes his head.

Spidey " Fuckin everyone's on vacation this week.. Kid Money, Pig Vomit, Rebel, Venom, plus a few others probably. That's why this show's so damn small. "

The intercom buzzes and the Vice-Prez hits a button on the arm of his chair.

Spidey " What is it?? "

Jamal's voice " Yo boss the fudge packer's here to see you "

Spidey hits the button on the arm of his chair again and replies.

Spidey " Alright, show him in "

A moment passes then Jamal enters the room escorting Packard Jimmy Epson.

Spidey " How's it going Jimmy?? "

Packard " Good sir "

Spidey " No problems at home or anything?? "

Packard " Umm.. No "

Spidey " Hmmm.. Well that's good I guess. I'll bet you're wondering why I brought you ere today huh?? "

Packard " Well.. Yeah I was actually "

Spider-Man gets up from his chair and walks over to Packard Epson. He puts his arm around the man's shoulders and leads him to the doors of the balcony.

Spidey " Well, I was just wondering what was wrong. I mean you joined the fed with alot of enthusiasm but then.. You see Jimmy.. You don't mind if I call you Jimmy do you?? "

Packard " Ummm.. No.. Go right ahead "

Spidey " Good. Well you see Jimmy, I'm a very busy man. Almost all of my time is spent running this fed and trying to make all of it's members happy. "

Packard nods as Spidey walks him out the balcony doors.

Spidey " Can you guess what makes the RMWF' wrestlers the happiest?? "

Packard ponders for a few moments then shrugs his shoulders.

Spidey " Matches. Our wrestlers like to have matches. Right now we have so many members and so few slots available on shows that they all can't get these matches. Currently, alot of the wrestlers are on vacation, but that wasn't the case last week. Regardless, it doesn't matter anyway. "

Confusion strikes Packard Epson's face as Spidey continues to babble.

Spidey " What I'm getting at Jimmy, is that you have wasted the time of myself and the time of my wrestlers "

Packard " Oh. I'm sorry. I really din't mean.. "

The Vice-prez gestures at him to be quiet.

Spidey " It's moot now. What's done is done "

Spider-Man gazes out over the forest that lies behind the RMWF Headquarters and scratches is chin in contimplation.

Spidey " Hmmm.. This is odd. I've actually grown tired of hearing myself speak "

Packard " Huh?? "

Spidey " Oh well "

Spider-Man shrugs his shoulders then gives Packard Jimmy Epson a quick kick that sends him hurdling over the balcony rail and down.. down.. down.. Til he reaches the Earth with a big splat. Spidey brushes his hands together then walks back into his office and sits back down in his chair He presses the chair's intercom button again.

Spidey " Jamal!! Get in here "

A moment later Jamal comes rushing into the room.

Jamal " Yo!! Whassup boss?? "

Spidey " I hate it when people waste the fed's time. I punished Jimmy "The Fudge Packer" for doing that. I even kept the cameras rolling so it could fill up the time gap on this show. You think excecuting him will make up for lack of one match?? "

Jamal " Hell yeah boss!! Peeps loves seeing muh-fucka's gettin offed "

Spidey " Yeah. I guess your right. Hey, c'mere "

Jamal " Ahite "

Jamal walks over to Spidey, who reaches over and punches Jamal in the side of the head, knocking him out.

Spidey " Okay, that's what I needed. I feel better now. A little bit. "

He gets up and walks to the next room.

Spidey, to the camera " Well you guys I'm going to bed. I don't even want to watch the next match. "

He slams the door shut behind him, then yells out from the other side of the door.

Spidey " Saturday's show will be killer though!! Watch that one!! "

The cameras switch back to the SiD and Guy.

SiD " Hey that' not fair!! Spidey get's to go to sleep and not watch this drivel, yet I have to!! That ain't right!! "

Guy " Oh get over it. It's our job "

SiD " I am not a machine!!! "

Guy starts laughing, " Okay Steve Arrogant "

SiD " Hehe.. Sorry.. Spidey was acting a little PMSy though. Any idea what's up with him?? "

Guy " I don't know. Stress? Lack of heroin?? No sleep, no sex?? Could be anything. Why the concern?? It's so unlike you "

SiD " Just trying to make conversasion "

Guy " Oh.. Okay well anyway, now we have a ladder match. For those who don't know what that is.. Well shame on you. It's simple, there's a bag hanging above the ring, you have to use the ladder that's on the floor to get to it. Get it and you win "

Tone Capone -vs- Eric "The Crusher" Johnson
Ladder Match
Tone Capone walks out and down to the ring, he is met with an assortment of boos from th crowd. Next out comes Eric "The Crusher" Johnson. He climbs into the ring and sarts mouthng obcenities at his opponent.

Guy " Well Eric Johnson isn't even waiting for the bell.. He goes after Capone with a power drop!!! The bell finally ring as Tone Capone leaps back up and uppercuts Johnson!!! He gives "The Crusher" a hip toss and the a elbow drop!!! Capone pulls him back to hs feet and Johnson shoves him away before he could pull off move on him.. Johnson runs into the ropes and springs back with a clothesline which sends Tone Capone down!! Eric slides out of thering and grabs the ladder "

SiD chuckles, " He can barely pick the damn thing up!!! He's struggling just to drag it over to the ring!!! "

Guy " Well a 16 foot steel ladder IS pretty heavy "

SiD " Oh please "

Guy " Well anyway.. Johnson gets the laddr half way into the ring whn Tone Capone snatches him up off the apron and over the ropes then piledrives him!!! He grabs the ladder ad pulls it the rest of the way in the ring and sets it up!!! He gets four steps up it.. Eric Johnson grabs him by the waist of his pants though and pulls him off!!! "

SiD " ..And so it begins "

Guy " And so what begins?? "

SiD " Ladder matches are so boring. All they are is one of the wrestlers getting a few steps up the ladder then the other guy pulling him off.. Over and over again "

Guy " Yeah, you have a point. Hopefully this ladder match will be a little mre exciting though "

SiD " Don't hold your breathe "

Guy " Eric Johnson hip tosses Capone then makes a break for the ladder but Capone grabs him and whips him into the ropes.. He clotheslines "The Crusher" on the return then grabs his feet.. "

SiD " Around and around he goes "

Guy " Tone Capone with a big toss that sends Eric through the ropes and to the floor outside of the ring!!! He's going for the ladder.. 4 steps up.. Eric gets to his feet.. Capone reaches the top and grabs the he bag hanging from above!!! "

Winner: Tone Capone

Guy " Johnson runs over and pulls the ladder out from under Tone and he comes down hard!!! He snatches the bag from Tone and waves it in the air "

SiD " What's he doing?? It's too late, Capone already won "

Guy " Yup.. Capone uppercuts Johnson and reclaims his prize as the ref raises Capones arm "

SiD " What's in that bag anyway??? "

Guy " I don't know. They wouldn't tell me "

SiD " They WOULDN'T??? "

Guy " Nope. Only the bag holder and Spidey know the contents "

SiD " Lame "

Guy " Yeah it is. Anyhow, that concludes this exciting, albeit short episode of Havok. Be sure to check out Saturday's show, it's supposed to be a pretty big show. So.. On behalf of SiD and myself, I bid you all a Good ight!! "

RMWF

SpiderMan7788@aol.com

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Page Updated Mon Dec 17, 2001 2:52pm EST