Oak Town Classic PPV 11-17-00 - Wrestling - http://maxpages.com/rmwfarchives/Oaktown_Classic

Prez's Office : ( The Prez is on the phone ...)

Prez " Get me someone , I gave Guy and SiD this night off we need announcers in twenty minutes the PPV is about to start. Where is The Preacher Man , well get me him I have an idea . ( pause ) Preacher Man we need an announcer can you whip someone up for me , great I will call you back later ... "

AND LETS BEGIN ... The PPV starts with a shot of a dark room , The Preacher Man standing in front of an alter with candles . "

PM " I command you to rise , Thug Life , THUG LIFE !!!! "

A blast of black smoke hits the room and then a flash , soon out of the floor rises Tupac Shakur.

Tupac " What do you want nigga , why did you call on me ??? "

PM " To announce a wrestling card , a PPV to be excact ."

Tupac " Whatever its good to be back lets go . "

Theme Music ...

" This is Space Ghost from Space Ghost Coast To Coast , with Tupac Shakur filling in last minute for Guy Mandel and SiD the King Nasty for The Oak Town Classic super PPV ."

Tupac " Hell's yeah nigga repisentin California in the house lets get down to some wrestling ... "

SG " Yes , whatever this will be a blast just like the time with the giant replicating pods and Zoraks .. "

Tupac " Whatever shut up you white devil and lets see some ass kicking . "

Rebel -vs- Vulcan Raven ( TV Title )
SG " Lets see here it says Rebel was one of the fastest men to win a belt in The RMWF in a long time but Vulcan Raven is a tough match . No , one knows how this will go so lets sit back faitful wrestling fans and watch this battle of cosmic proportions unfold . "

Tupac " Why are you dressed like that , you some kind of new breed of The KKK ??? "

SG " No my friend I am a superhero , I fight evil like The KKK . Even though I don't like to get wrapped up in politics . "

Tupac " Whatever bro lets get this thing started I have an afterlife to get back to . "

SG " We have a hair pulling match to start it off . Rebel pulls down Vulcan and applies a knee to the throat . You know from what I hear Vulcans are a very sophisticated race of aliens .

Tupac " I don't think he is that kinda Vulcan , man . "

SG " Vulcan gets out from the knee choke and sends Rebel into the turnbuckle , then follows with a big splash . Vulcan standing on the ropes punching Rebel in the face as the crowd counts the blows . I like this sport , Earth is a real advanced planet . Rebel pushes Vulcan off of him but Raven takes him down with him ... "

Tupac " Vulcan raven is no joke .. "

SG " Ahh yes Tupac sir , no joke indeed .. But I can tell you a joke if you would like to hear one ??? "

Tupac " No ,just call the match ..."

SG " Hmmm lets see Vulcan Raven , rebel who is who again ??? "

Tupac " Oh man when they brought me back they never said I would be working with a moron . "

SG " Where is that monkey when you need him ??? Um , Rebel slips out of an arm bar , then lets see he takes down Raven with a side suplex followed by a brutal powerbomb .. He lays on top of him , this is kinda homosexual ??? "

Tupac " He's pinning him foo , the count 1 ... 2... no kick out by Raven . "

SG " Oh thats how you win the contest !! Well , Rebel did not win . "

Tupac " We know that tell them that Raven has the upper hand now .."

SG " Raven has the upper hand now as he got off a shot to the groin . That should not be allowed !! "

Tupac " Its not .. "

SG " Well , he should be zapped .. "

Tupac " Sit down you can't zap the wrestlers .. "

SG " Well that man in the zebra cloth should , what is wrong with these people ."

Tupac " Look up in the rafters who is that ??? "

SG " Violater of X-Treme Inc , I believe ... He just bungee jumped off the rafters and oh my lord set Vulcan Raven on fire .. "

Tupac " Yeah but Vulcan Raven is holding on to Violater and he lets him go shooting him back up into the rafters , oh man that mans head just bounced off the top of the arena and exploded ... "

SG " Yes , a fallen comrade ..."

Tupac " Yeah one dead white boy .. "

SG " Vulcan Raven is running around on fire , drop and roll son , drop and roll ... Rebel has a fire extinguisher and puts out Vulcan Raven who passes out from the pain ... And easy cover for Rebel and this one is over ... "

Winner : Rebel
" This is Clive Anderson even though The Prez gave Guy and SiD the night off I never get a vacation . We are still investigating the Darkstalka attack about two weeks ago . Word is The Prez does know who was behind the attack and will announce it later in the show . Now back to Space Ghost and Tupac . "

Kid Money -vs- The Warrior Three ( IC and Cage Belts in a cage )
( Kid Money comes down to his entance music and does his thing ... Next , a burst of white smoke explodes in the ring and The Warrior Three appears in the middle of the ring .. A steal cage lowers around the ring and the match begins ... )

SG " This is our second match of this tournament of gladiaters ... "

Tupac " Would you stop with your gladiators crap this is just wrestling , your one whacked out craka ..."

SG " Thank you your one whacked out caka also ... Lets see Warrior Three has his Berakian war sword and is chasing Kid Money , while the man in zebra cloth tries to stop him ... "

Tupac " What the hell is a Berakian ??? Thats just some sword man and thats the ref not a zebra !!!! "

SG " Oh yes , hmmmm I see ... The battle rages on as The Warrior Three is disarmed and Kid Money drop kicks him forcing him to fall to the mat ... Kid Money comes in for a closer look and recieves a blow to his skull by The Warrior Three . "

Tupac " Oh man death is better then listening to you let me call the match .. The Warrior Three slams Kid Money's ass to the mat , now he is stomping on his ass .. He nailed that sucka good , hahaha this s--- is funny ..."

SG " HAHAHA , oh yes funny very .. Reminds me of ... "

Tupac " Anyway The Warrior chump just tried to send Kid Money into the cage but the white boy blocked it and showd him the correct way to do it ..."

SG " Exscuse me Mr. Tupac ..."

Tupac " What you want ??? "

( ZZZZZAP Space Ghost nails Tupac with his arm band lazer ... It disrupts The Preachers Mans connection and sends Tupac back to the netherworld , leaving just Space Ghost .... Plus making this stupid Space Ghost , Tupac thing end because its not as funny as I thought it would be when I was drunk at three in the morning .. )

SG " That will teach him to cut me off again , I'm a super hero not to be messed with . Now where is your regular announcers ... "

( silence )

( The match continues as Kid Money tries to make his way up the cage after beating Warrior Three's head into the cage for a few minutes drawing blood ... He is stopped short as The Warrior shakes the cage causing Money to fall backwards to the mat . The Warrior Three still bleeding hops on Kid Money and begins pounding on him , he is flipped off then press slammed to the mat ... Kid Money follows suit and DDT's The Warior Three to the mat then makes his way to the door ... The ref opens the cage and Money is almost out as The Warrior Three dives as a last chance effort and catches his leg biting it .. Kid Money screams in surprise then boots the warrior in the face causing him to break his hold ... Kid Money comes back into the center of the ring and sets The Warrior up for a piledriver but the warrior slips out and around behind Kid Money for an atomic drop ... The match rages on as both men go toe to toe exchanging blows and punches ... )

*** News Break - Guy and SiD have been contacted by The Prez and are on there way to Oakland to finish the PPV , Space Ghost has spotted Diablo the sewer monster and is chasing him trying to rid The RMWF of its evil .... Now back to more babble and match descriptions by me your Prez ... ***

( The match still continues as Kid Money and Warrior Three actually have to wrestle no guns or swords this time kiddies ... Who's gonna win , whats gonna happen ??? One man will come out with two belts and the other will go home a LOSER !!! Re-cap , The Warrior Three is bleeding from having his head beaten into the cage repeatedly and Kid Money almost made it out of the cage twice .. When we last left them The Warrior Three had the upper hand but Kid Money quickly ended that with an eye rake and a leg sweep ... Kid Money now shows off his wrestling skill with a moonsault then a side suplex and The Warrior Three is wounded and winded .. Then in a RMWF ONLY turn of events Kid Money pulls down The Warrior Three's wrestling trunks around his ankles and makes his way up the cage ... The Warrior tries to stop him but trips over his pants and Kid Money swings one leg over the top of the cage ... In maybe his last , last ditched effort The Warior Three dives at the cage shaking it causing Kid Money to slip and fall off the cage crashing through a table but still winning the match ... We have a new Cage Champ as Kid Money is two belts richer but he is very hurt .. The medic team rushes to his aid as The Warrior tries to cover up his privates which by judging by the size proves God can have a sence of humpr also ... )

Winner and New Cage Champ : Kid Money
Guy " Well our night off cut short .. "

SiD " Tell me about it what a bag of monkey crap .. That Space Ghost guy was such a moron how he ever get his own show ??? "

Guy " Did you ever see it ?? "

SiD " No ... "

Guy " Well it sucks thats why , screw him ... "

SiD " Yeah , screw him .. Lets get this thing over so we can go home ..."

Guy " Or back to the rest stop ... "

SiD " Screw off .. "

Darkstalka -vs- Angel ( Hardcore Belt )
( Oh it all starts the same Angel comes out to some music and smoke , walks down to the ring and so on .. Darkstalka has his four wolves again and his Kid Rock song .. )

SiD " Those wolves should be banned after what happened last time ... "

Guy " I agree we all were almost wolf food .. But he's tying them up as the match begins .. Both men lock up and let go , circling the ring . Darkstalka darts in only to be side stepped by Angel .. "

SiD " The forces of good and evil collide in The RMWF once again , hehe .. "

Guy " A good tie up by Angel only to be broken by Darkstalka with a whip into the ropes .. Clothesline takes Angel down and Darkstalka is on him quick with a knee drop . Angel up but Darkstalka scoops him up for a slam then goes for an early pin ... "

SiD " He's not gonna get this guy that early . "

Guy " AAAAAAnd you are correct SiD as Angel kicks out .... Darkstalka with a choke slam into the turnbuckle and Angel crumbles to the floor ... The beating keeps coming as The Dark One gets off a back breaker then another pin .. Angel gets his arm up before three and Darkstalka lets him to his feet only to take him down with a suplex ... "

SiD " Oh here comes trouble that moron Krazed is back and he's coming down to the ring !!! "

Guy " Why did The Prez let him back , he's only gonna quit in two days ??? He has the mic and Darkstalka stops to watch him ... "

Krazed " Darkstalka remember a couple of weeks ago you we're wanking off in you locker room ?? The lights cut off and you panicked to turn off your gay porno ??? Then something hit ya , and when you woke up you we're beaten and tied up .. I know it nags you who did it and tonight you get your answer it was me !!! "

SiD " Hahahaha his gay porno .. "

Guy " Krazed comes running down to the ring and he has a kendo stick but he is blocked off by CSD , The Prez's body guard ... Krazed nails him with the kendo stick but wait Angel gets up from behind and nails Darkstalka with a chair .. The Ref saw it but he is leaving the ring ??? "

SiD " What is going on ?? "

Guy " Here comes The Prez out of the crowd with N.W.O.. and now The Prez has the mic . "

The Prez " Krazed I new letting you back would be trouble but tonight you do noy get to decide the outcome of this match ... A while back when Angel joined this fed he had a lot of harsh things to say about me and my establishment .. Well its time he learned that he better watch his mouth , get him boys ... "

Guy " Neep , Fraser and Chyna charge the ring and attack Angel , the ref has left the ring so its pure chaos .. Krazed is battling CSD as he has a cattle prod and took down Krazed ... Angel is getting a whouping by the hands of N.W.O and Darkstalka is still down fron that chair shot earlier ... "

SiD " But wait we have more Nightmare and ICP are coming to the ring , what are they doing out there ??? "

Guy " The Prez did not expect this so they slip by CSD and his cattle prod .. They get into the ring and attack N.W.O. , its all out chaos ..."

SiD " I guess they wanted to help Angel , maybe they are starting a new stable or just feel bad that The Prez is screwing them ??? "

BOOM !!!
( The camera pans to Sid and Guy whos faces are black like in a cartoon ... )

SiD " Uh what the hell just happened ??? "

Guy " The ring blew up someone planted a bomb .. Wait look up there on The RMWFtron ... The words you all been had X-Treme Inc ... Oh my god they killed Rodent , those bastards !!! "

SiD " He was out there ??? "

Guy " No , they just killed him ... Our medical team is out there this is horrible everyone is hurt , fans are dead , X-Treme Inc is insane !!! We have a report from Clive Anderson back stage ... "

" This is Clive Anderson The Prez just got word on the ring explosion and is sending CSD and Mr. T to find the rest of X-Treme Inc to kick there asses for blowing up his ring ... We will keep you posted .. "

Guy " So now what , Krazed was far enough from the blast to be OK and he is hunting throught the ruins for something .. He found it The Hardcore belt that he picks up and walks away with ... Darkstalka just climbed out of the wreck and is going after Krazed . "

SiD " Its amazing that anybody survived ... "

Guy " Gary Coleman is announcing a no contest for this one kids , lets go to some promos while they clean this up .. "

( promos )

Bandit -vs- Ravage ( World Belt )
Guy " We got the ring some what repaired after The X-Treme Inc bombing , and its time for the main event ... "

SiD " $ 29.95 was sure a rip off for this thing . To have to sit through Space Ghost and Tupac then it only has what four matches ??? "

Guy " Yes , but we've seen a couple of injuries and a death thats worth $29.95 right there . Plus all the matches we're great battles , no mis-matches here ...

( insert entrances to for wrestlers here .. *** Sorry , I don't add them for you but I'm writing this it at work and don't have the applications with me .. )

Guy " Lets get ready to rumble . Ravage gives his belt the biggest prize in The RMWF to the ref who walks it around the ring .... The bell rings and both men charge at each other ... Ravage slugs Bandit and spit goes a flying , watch out .."

SiD " That was a boxers punch , wonder what Bandit has up his sleeve for this match ??? "

Guy " After blowing up the ring who knows , I don't think X-Treme could top that . Ravage now with a whip into the ropes and Bandit holds on as Ravage misses with a drop kick .. Bandit hops upon the second ropes and comes off with a flying clothesline that takes Ravage down as he tried to get up .. Now Bandit picks up the champ by his hair and flipshimover for a big pile driver ... "

SiD " Bandit use to be the top guy in this fed , not anymore as ABSTRKT move'd in and took this fed by storm .. Too bad Ashura is not around no more , maybe she could hook up with Jamal , heh .. "

Guy " That brought this fed to an all time low , I never thought it could get any
worse ."

SiD " You use to defend it .. "

Guy " Oh you loved it turnpike boy ... Ravage , WOW with a awesome crippler cross face off the ropes and Bandit is down and out ... Its Ravage time as he takes back control of this match ... Ravge picks Bandit up and gives him a back breaker then bounces off the ropes for a big leg drop . Oh and The Champ is going for the finish here as he sets up Badit for an Omega Bomb ... "

SiD " Bandit has suvived worse ... The only man I have ever seen break out of a camel clutch in my whole career .. "

Guy " Well he does not have to survive this one as he slipped away from Ravage and brought him down with a tornado DDT .. Bandit bends down and slaps Ravage , then kicks him in the midsection ... He's going to the top rope and here he comes with a moonsault off the top rope .. A cover and 1..2...3 ITS OVER ... "

SiD " No, its not Ravage got his arm up last second the ref is showing only a two and a half count .. "

Guy " Oh man I thought it was over , how Ravge get out of that .. Bandit is mad and yelling at the ref as Ravge crawls up from behind and rolls Bandit into a small package , only a one count as Bandit kicks out ... Bandit gets to his feet and is tackled by Ravage who begins to pummel him ,but Bandit gets a knee up to the groin and Ravge rolls off in pain ..Bandit quickly scoops up The Champ and sends himover the ropes and outside the ring .. "

SiD " Guess he needed a breather. If I were Ravge , I would stay out there get counted out and keep the belt .. "

Guy " Well , your not Ravage and he is climbing back into the ring but Bandit flys over with a flying clothesline which Ravage ducks ... Bandit crashes to the hard floor and is holding his arm .. "

SiD " Hope he did not hurt it again ... "

Guy " Did he hurt it before ??? "

SiD " I don't know some time in his past I am sure he hurt his arm ... "

Guy " Whatever , Ravage hops off the ring apron after Bandit and grabs a hand full of hair sending Bandit intothe ring post ... "

SiD " He just hit his shoulder if your gonna nail someone into the ring post then at least smash his face into it ... "

Guy " Ravge now has Bandit up for a press slam and smashes him on the floor . That had to hurt bad , that floor is not soft .... Bandit is very slow to get up as Ravage is back into the ring to break the count .. "

SiD " Well ,who cares because here comes Madman to the ring ... New someone who be out here to help old Bandit . "

Guy " The Ref distracted by Madman as he trys to stop him coming to the ring and Ravage is trying to keep an eye on both men .. "

SiD " X-Treme Inc has messed up this whole PPV , hey here comes CSD and Mr. T , plus Stone Cold Steve Austin ... "

Guy " Madman see's them and starts to run for the ring .. The ref hops out and tackles him ."

SiD " Is he nuts he's gonna get his butt kicked ??? "

Guy " yes , but from the crowd comes Fanatic of X-Treme Inc , he is in the ring as Ravage is watching the action and nails him from behind with a sledge hammer .. He slides Bandit on top of Ravage . "

SiD " These bastards are smart Madman picked up the ref and pointed to the ring he is going in to count .. "

Guy " Madman is nailed from behind by Stone Cold and Mr. T is stomping on him .. CSD trys to get into the ring to set everything right but the ref is counting 1....2.... CSD trips and falls 3 !!! Bandit won !!! "

Winner and NEW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD : BANDIT
SiD " You got to give it to them thats why they are the best .. They now how to rule a wrestling fed , blowing up rings and screwing matches .. "

Guy " And taking one for the team .. Fanatic grabbed the belt and high tailed it out of there with Bandit as Madman is geting pummled ... Well thats the end of our PPV 'till next card this is Guy Mandel for the whole RMWF team saying good night , good night .. "

RMWF

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Page Updated Sat May 19, 2001 6:38am EDT