Friday Night Slam 3-9-01 - Wrestling - http://maxpages.com/rmwfarchives/3_9_01_Friday_Night

After two weeks it's BACK !!! Friday Night Slam Baby fully booked and ready to roll lets go to Guy and SiD for pre-card updates !!

" This is Guy Mandel with SiD " The King " Nasty brinning to you another Friday Night Slam , the first one in March as we close in on our one year anniversary . "

SiD " How the hell have we made it one year already ? You would of figured someone would have closed us by now .. the Feds , NAACP , PETA or something ..

Guy " Tonight is a jammed packed show . We have a triple threat match , a TV Title match and a rematch for the tag belts !!! So lets get rolling ...

Rebel -vs The Klaw 2
SiD " I thought Spider-Man had the Klaw killed "

Guy " Well it was never proven that he was the one who put out the hit "

SiD " You're missing my point.. The Klaw is supposed to be dead "

Guy " The Klaw IS dead SiD "

SiD " Oh.. Wait a minute then what, is he a zombie??? "

Guy " Huh??? SiD, that's not the Klaw out there.. it's the Klaw 2 "

SiD " ...... "

Guy " Feelin stupid huh??? "

SiD " Shut up "

Guy " Klaw 2 attacks Rebel with a sound blast !!!"

SiD " Hey , thats cheating this is NOT Division X !!! "

Guy " Yes , here comes Neep to the ring . He is applying a colar to The Klaw which neutralize his powers but the damage is already done Rebel is fucked up . He is slumped in the corner with blood trickling out his mouth and down his chin , as The Klaw 2 nails him in the face with a big boot .. The Klaw 2 picks up Rebel and flings him across the ring with an airplane spin . "

SiD " This is not fair The Klaw 2 should be DQed Rebel has no chance now ."

Guy " The Klaw now with a choke hold that the ref makes him break . Neep is on the ouside of the ring watching shaking his head . He does not like Rebel but has a job to do as The Prez's enforcer ."

SiD " Here comes Issues to the ring , he is head of the displinary commitee . I wonder what he is going to do ? "

Guy " Neep and Issues are yelling at each other while The Klaw 2 punishes Rebel more . Rebel is being tosssed around like a rag doll , somebody better do something before he is really hurt in there . The Klaw 2 is climbing to the top rope here he comes BUT WAIT Rebel moved out of the way BUT barely . "

SiD " HOLY CRAP ! Rebel still has life in him .

Guy "The Klaw 2 gets up and takes a shot at Rebel but it is blocked and Rebel kicks him in the groin . "

SiD " Does The Klaw 2 have a dick , hes pure sound ? "

Guy " From the pain he is in I guess so . Rebel still sluggish is putting a smack down on The Klaw 2 . Heres a Power Bomb , an atomic drop followed by a full nelson ."

SiD " Man Rebel is going crazy , how he survived that blast and still has all this energy is amazing ."

Guy " Rebel with his finisher ( Add name of finisher here ____ ) and a cover 1 ,2 , 3 its all over ."

SiD " Look at that Rebel passed out right after the match what a trooper !"

Winner : Rebel

Kid Money -vs- Mr. Showtime
( Kid Money comes out to a mixed reaction to the crowd followed by Showtime who only old school RMWF fans get excited about !! )

SiD " Oh this guy is back does anyone care ? He's washed up and done with how many come backs do we need ? "

Guy " Yes , people care he was one of the first RMWF superstars . "

SiD " OOOOOOh aaaaaaaah damn ! "

Guy " Whats wrong ? "

SiD " I got a shit cramp , man that damn airline food . "

Guy " Kid Money and Showtime getting ready for the match as the bell rings . I donn't think these two have ever met before so this should be interesting . "

SiD " So does this mean Chaos Inc. is back ? "

Guy " Don't know I think they we're part of N.W.O. when they left . Stop asking so many damn questions . Both men lock up and pull apart , they circle the ring looking for an opening when Kid Money charges and is taken down by a russian footsweep ."

SiD " Damn commies ! "

Guy " Showtime follows with a side head lock but Money struggles back up to his feet and breaks it with a shot to the mid-section . Kid Money with a irsih whip into the ropes catches Showtime for a side slam . Money picks Showtime up and sets him up for a suplex which is blocked and reversed . "

SiD " Nice reverse by Showtime , ho hum ( yawn ) . "

Guy " Showtime with a few right hands into Kid Money's face then scoops him off the mat for a press slam . Kid Money holding his back in pain as Showtime jams a boot into his face . "

SiD " When is Kid Money ever gonna get a title shot , I mean the big title I think he deserves it by now . "

Guy " Maybe if he wins this match SiD you never know . Showtime with a power bomb and a cover but Kid Money kicks out at two . Showtime better not take Money that litely .

SiD " ( Yawn )

Guy " Kid Money ducks a blow by Showtime and kicks him in the shin forcing Showtime to hop around on one foot . Kid Money delivers a drop kick making sure the big man goes down this time . "

SiD " Why did he kick him in the shin is he a girl ? "

Guy " It was the only thing he could hit . Kid Money with a headlock whips Showtime into the ropes and nails him with flying cross body , then a pin . Showtime is not gonna let his return end that quickly , kicks out . Kid Money looks a little tired but presses on with a few nicley calculated moves which forces Showtime to retreat out of the ring . Kid Money does not follow but takes a rest as Showtime licks his wounds . "

SiD " When he's done licking his wounds he can come over here I got something for him to lick . "

Guy " Kid Money tired of waiting for Showtime waves for him to come back in the ring . Which he does only to recieve a boot to the midsection and a suplex back into the ring . Showtime still on the ground grabs Kid Moneys legs and flips him over for an attempted pin which Money cuts short with a shot to the eyes . "

SiD " Looks like Showtime is having a hard time trying to figure out Kid MOney ."

Guy " Kid Money has Showtime up for a choke slam and sends him to the mat by his throat ."

SiD " That was a devistating move . Kid Money has to go for the kill now because you don't want to fool around with Showtime ."

Guy " Too late Showtime just slipped a move by Kid Money and sent him into the ropes . He charges and nails Kid Money with a big splash . Suplex by Showtime and then a cover but Kid Money kicks out again . Showtime waisting no time trys to slap on a figure four but Kid Money kicks him in the ass before he could pull it off . Now Kid Money comes off the ropes but Showtime ducks a clothesline and nails Kid Money in the kidneys . It's Showtimes show now as he pulls off a snap mare ."

SiD " This is a long match someone better get the pin before time runs out . "

Guy " Do we even have a time keeper anymore ?"

SiD " Yeah he's asleep over there . That is good for these two because it should of ran out by now . "

Guy " Showtime with a few more power moves then another pin . Kid Money kicks out but it seemed like a slow count by the ref . Showtime is yelling at the ref and Kid MOney comes up from behind with a double ax handle then a sunset flip . The ref gives a quick 3 count to give Kid Money the win ."

SiD " Heh welcome back Showtime that will teach you to complain again . "

Guy " Showtime is pissed and he goes after the ref you makes a quick escape right behind Kid Money !"

Winner : Kid Money
" Clive Anderson with a special report . The tag team title match tonight has been canceled . Pig Vomit has overdosed and has been taken to the hospital . The Preacher Man said it is The Bravehearts lucky day because they will get to keep there belts 'till the match is rescheduled . "

Master C -vs- HHH -vs- Fightin Falcon
Guy " This is the triple threat match first man who gets a pin wins !!! Lets skip the intros and go right to the match ... "

SiD " Is HHH , Triple H or just HHH ??? "

Guy " We had this conversation before just drop it . Master C starts the match off with a flying cross body taking down both men . HHH is up first and returns the favor to C with a scoop slam only to be taken down by a drop kick from Falcon . Falcon has a fist full of hair and sends HHH through the ropes out onto the floor and turns his attention to Master C . Master C exchanges blows with Falcon but comes up short as Falcon takes him down with a swift leg drop . Behind them HHH gets back into the ring and climbs the top rope . Here he comes nailing Falcon from behind with another drop kick ."

SiD " Ahhhhhh but a flying drop kick Guy not just any drop kick . Do you ever get the feeling we are running out of material ? "

Guy " Sorta , but we must carry on . The RMWF will survive as it always has . Through diversity and bad weather . HHH with a power slam . "

SiD " How about that St. Patricks PPV that should be exciting should'nt it ? "

Guy " Oh I hope so because we are sure dying here . God save us ! "

SiD " We get to go to Ireland and catch a leprechaun . For his pot of gold . Do you think leprechauns are like the ones in that movie Leprechaun ? All nasty and ugly looking and mean . I sure hope so because I liked those movies and want to get his autograph . "

Guy " OK enough babble lets pay attention to the match which has Falcon right now with the upper hand . He almost had a pin on Master C but HHH saved his ass by breaking the pin . Falcon goes after HHH but is caught off guard with a running clothesline then a ddt . Falcon is down and out as Master C takes down HHH with a running tackle . Master C with atomic drop on HHH then a power bomb ... Ooooooooh the new comer showing his stuff now . "

SiD " Who's Diablo ? "

Guy " The Sewer Monster ? "

SiD " No the guy who keeps popping up in the fed who no one is paying attention too . "

Guy " I don't know where do you come up with this shit ."

SiD " Just trying to fill in space here . Cut me a break . "

Guy " Master C is celebrating on top of the ropes , taunting the crowd as Falcon just now recovers from that ddt earlier . Falcon sneaks up from behind on Master C who moonsaults off the top rope taking him down ."

SiD " Ohh that was sneaky . And Nick wins . Oh sorry having Sunday cards flashbacks . "

Guy " Master C with the pin but HHH dives to break it before 3 !

SiD " Aren't those two guys friends now??? "

Guy " Who??? "

SiD " HHH and Master C "

Guy " Yea.. They are both in Nightmare's stable now "

SiD " Wait isn't Fightin Falcon in it too?? "

Guy " Maybe "

SiD " Then why are they fighting each other??? "

Guy " Well who else CAN they fight??? I mean that's why it's stupid of Nightmare to try to get everyone to join his stable.. I mean he did the same thing last time.. his stable had like thirty members.. and none of them did anything or helped each other or worked for some kind of common goal or anything.. it was just like ' Okay now we have this big ass stable, none of it's members will fight each other now so hey guess what?? theres no one left to fight now ' and he keeps trying to make it a second corporate stable too which is even more ubsurd "

SiD " The Prez should put a limit on stable members "

Guy " For once SiD I agree with you "

SiD " Hey look!! "

Guy " What??? Oh!!! The match is over and the ref is holding HHH's hand in the air!!! We missed the pin!! "

SiD " It happens.. Oh well "

Winner: HHH
SiD " HHH seems satisfied with his victory "

Guy " He is shooting up the ranks pretty fast .. Definatly making a strong name for himself "

( Theres a brief moment when all is silent and a man in the crowd's voice can be heard. )

Man in the crowd " My hemmeroid's killin me!!! "

SiD " Haha!! D'you hear that Guy??? "

Guy " Yea "

Darkstalka -vs- Killer Priest ( Hardcore Match )
Guy " OK the good news is this is a hardcore match , which we have not had in a while . The bad news is Darkstalka is in it . "

SiD " Hey its my job to put down the wrestlers . Lets see what Darkstalka can find to cry about now or did this match never happen ? "

Guy " Darkstalka has his casket of weapons out there but Killer Priest promised us he would take care of that early . "

SiD " He did ? "

Guy " Shhhhh yes he did . Darkstlaka starts the match off before the bell nailing Priest with a rubber chicken . Now he is bending him over his knee and smacking his ass . "

SiD " I think Darkstalks is getting aroused by this ! "

Guy " He is not cut it out . Wait ooooooh yeah those pants are a little to revealing , yuuuck ! " Killer Priest gets up and launches Darkstalka into the ropes by his boner , then follows up with a drop kick . Outside the ring Pig Vomit comes dwon to the ring . "

SiD " What is he doing out here he has no beef with these two ? "

Guy " He's doing what Pig Vomit does best taking a dump in Darkstalka's casket . Darkstalka sees him last minute and follows him out of the ring . Nightmare just came out from undernieth the ring and nails Darkstalka from behind with a double ax handle as Killer Priest lights his casket on fire . Darkstalka is fightning Nightmare as his casket burns ! "

SiD " Wheeeeeeew man that shit stinks . What did Pig Vomit eat a dead mexican ? Oooooooh god it's even worse now that Priest lit it on fire , aaaaaaack , aaaaaaack . "

Guy " Nightmare is taken down by Darkstalka only to be hit from behind by Killer Priest with a wheel chair . "

SiD " He stole that chair from that gimp over there . The poor slob is laying on the floor as Pig Vomit steals his wallet . "

Guy " Whos wallet ? "

SiD " The paralyzed guy laying on the floor . "

Guy " Ooooooh thats low , real low . Nightmare sets Darkstalka up in the chair and rolls him at the flaming casket . Darkstalka kicks the casket out of the way as Nightmare tried to dump him in it.. The kick however sent flames everywhere.. even onto the wheel chair which has now ignited "

SiD " Talk about hell on wheels "

Guy " Darkstalka tries to jump from the chair but Nightmare starts running it up the catwalk and the sudden jolt of speed forces Darkey back down. Killer Preist chases after the two wrestlers "

SiD " Where the hell are they going? "

Guy " There.. The TitanTron shows the three of them in the dressing room!!! Darkstalka finally out of the wheel chair grabs Nightmare by the throat and choke slams him into the buffet table!!!! The sprinkler system has just kicked in extinguishing the chair so at least we dont hafta worry about the place burning down "

SiD " I wish it would "

Guy " Darkstalka moves his attention to Killer Priest who is charging him.. DK stops him with a short arm clothesline!! Now he's picking up one of the beer kegs.. He smashes Priest in the head with it!!!! "

SiD " DAMN!!! That's gotta hurt."

Guy " Darkstalka grabs the semi-concious Killer Preist by the hair and drags him out the door. "

SiD " Now where are they going?? "

Guy " Looks to me like DK's leading the match down the hall and... out to the parking garage "

SiD " He's not gonna run over Killer Priest in a car is he? "

Guy " Come on now.. The RMWF may be cheezy.. but it aint that bad "

SiD " DK punches his hand through a car window, opens the door and gets inside.. whats he doing? "

Guy " He's putting a tape in the tape deck "

( 'Your Gonna Burn In Hell' by Twisted Sister blasts through the garage. )

Guy " The song seems be to envigorating Darkstalka as he climbs onto the roof of a parked car and raises his fists in the air and starts screaming at the top of his lungs!!!! Killer Priest is starting to stur but Darkstalka leaps off the car and nails him with falling axe handle! "

Sid " Now what??!! "

Guy " DK is placing Killer Priest on the fork of that forklift!!! He gets inside it and throws a lever raising it!!! Killer Priest can't get free! Does that count as a pin? "

SiD " Sounds good to me .. This match has gone on too long anyway "

Winner: Darkstalka
Guy " Here's Truimph.. Hey are you ready to defend the TV Belt tonight??? "

Triumph " What? What are you talking about?

Guy " You have to fight Iceman next for the TV Title "

Triumph " What? Are you crazy man? The Belt is mine and I am not going to fight no one for it you sons of bitches!!! "

SiD " Better tell that to Iceman "

Iceman -vs- Triumph
Guy " Iceman come down the catwalk and is headed this way "

Triumph " AHHHH!!! Hide me hide me!! "

SiD " Run Triumph run.. Get the hell away from us "

( Triumph takes off as Iceman reaches the announcer's table. He chases the insult comic around the ring. )

Triumph " AHHHH!! Get away from me Iceman.. Its my Belt and you cant have it!!! "

( Triumph turns the ring's corner and trips. )

Triumph " Oh crap!!! "

( Iceman runs up to the fallen dog and is aout to give him an elbow drop. )

Triumph " Not the face!! Not the face!!! Oh here just take the stinking Belt!!! "

( Iceman takes the TV Belt from Triumph. )

Winner and New TV Champ: Iceman
SiD " I can't believe they even let Triumph keep that Belt for the few days that he had it anyway .. I mean he's an announcer not a wrestler "

Guy " But I suppose it was alright to let one have a crown??? "

SiD " ...... Of course "

( SiD leans back in his chair, puts his feet on the table and hands behind his head. Then he falls over. )

SiD " OOWWW!!! "

Guy " Haha!! Well anyway folks.. this concludes tonight's show. Be sure to tune in Wednsday, St. Patrick's Day for the Kissin' The Blarney PPV, it should be great. Goodnight "

( The credits role )

RMWF

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Page Updated Sat May 19, 2001 6:38am EDT