Friday Night Slam 1-19-01 - Wrestling - http://maxpages.com/rmwfarchives/1_19_01_Friday_Night

" This is gonna be a good one folks , Guy Mandel here for another addition of Friday Night Slam ... We have as our main event a World Title match .. Plus Wild Kat -vs- The Kat who is the real one ??? "

SiD " Who cares as long as they both get naked !!!! "

Guy " A couple of new wrestlers will make there debut and rumor has it the original Darkstalka is back ..."

SiD " Which means the new Darkstalka better watch his back ..."

Guy " Now a few words from your feerless Prez ... "

WIL Double " Ladies and Gentelmen on The RMWF ... The threat of Costa Nastro has ended as they have left the fed ... All staff members can come out of hiding as The RMWF is once a safe place again .. Lets rejoice !!! "

( The Prez rips off his shirt and peels off his bullet proof jacket ... Bad Andy crawls out of a sewer pipe , Diablo " The sewer monster " is set free of Costa's clutches and Clive Anderson leaves the gay bar he was hannging out in ....They all hold hands and sing a song ...)

SiD " Whay are they always singing sons in this fed and holding hands ??"

Guy " What they like to sing , no big deal .... Lets get on with our first match ..

( Just then gun shots are heard then a loud screams like a bunch of girls echo's through the arena .. )

SiD " What was that ??? "

( Bad Andy comes running by waving his hands in the air , screaming ... The camera shot changes to Clive Anderson crying up against a wall with a gun shot wound ... The Prez stands in his office door firing a hand gun into the air while CSD lies in a pool of blood .. )

Guy " I guess Costa is back already and they juts killed CSD for like the fifth time in his career ... "

SiD " Damn , those guys never give up do they ??? "

Kat -vs- Wild Kat
( The Preacher Man drives out on his motorcycle and drops off Wild Kat ... The Kat walks out on to the entrance ramp and makes her way to the ring .... )

SiD " Oh no watch out , The Preacher Man is gonna run over The Kat with his bike .. We havem't even seen her naked yet !!!! "

( The Preacher Man revs his engine and speeds off right at The Kat ... She is to busy playing the crowd to notice and gets side swiped by The Preacher's motorcycle ...)

Guy " The Kat is down before the match has even started as Wild Kat comes out of the ring ...."

SiD " Welcome to The RMWF baby , this place in NO place for a woman ..."

Guy " Our World Heavyweight Champ might disagree with that comment ... Wild Kat , drags The Kat by her hair to the ring and tosses her in as the bell rings ... She applys a head scissors and trys to make The Kat tap out early ..."

SiD " Oh god I would love to have those legs wrapped around my face .. What a view , we need more chick fights like this ... "

Guy " The Kat struggles to get free but Wild Kat only applies more pressure ... The ref is checking her arm and she is not giving up ... "

SiD " Actually , Wild Kat is such a skank maybe Kat will pass out from the smell down there ..."

Guy " Kat reaches for the ropes and is just a hair short ... She stretches and just grabs them forcing Wild Kat to break the hold ... Kat is up but slow and Wild Kat takes advantage with a big drop kick ... Wild Kat now with a fist full of hair sends The Kat into the ropes and finishes with a clotheline ... The Kat tries to come back with a puch to the mid section but Wild Kat shrugs it off and returns the favor ... "

SiD " Would don't they stop this stupid fightning and get naked already !!!!"

Guy " This is not a strip club SiD , this is a wrestling fed , drop it already ... Wild Kat with a suplex then she picks The Kat back up and whips her into the ropes again tornado ddt and a pin 1..2...3 its all over as Wild Kat wins .."

Winner : Wild Kat
" Clive Anderson with a locker room report .. Costa Nastro is back as The Prez rewarded them there belts they did not recieve in the past from the lost Incarnation card .. BUT this did not end the attemps of Costa trying to take over the fed as they just released another hit on The RMWF staff .. CSD was shot and killed for a reported fourth time as I was wounded , it is now a health hazard to be RMWF staff member all BEWARE !!!! "

SiD " It has been a long time since we had a report from that fag and then he goes and gets himself shot .."

Guy " Why do you think Costa nver takes a hit out on us SiD ????"

SiD " Too easy I guess .."

Guy " Well coming up next is the debut of The Klaw , who sent us a bloody message last Friday to announce his coming ..."

SiD " Yeah just what we need another hot head looking for world domination ... Like Costa is not enough ..."

The Klaw -vs- Timebomb
( The Klaw comes out with two hunch backed henchmen , with Mankind type masks on there faces and in straight jackets that are not tied up .. He climbs into the ring and waits as Time Bomb makes his way down to the ring .. )

Guy " And here we go ... The Klaw is quickly taken down by Timebomb ... Timebomb with a boot to the face then lifts up The Klaw for a power bomb ... A pin and The Klaw kicks out .... The match continues as they circle the ring then charge to lock up ... The Klaw gets a cheap shot in with a knee to the mid section and a snap mare to the ground ... Timebomb tries to get up but The Klaw keeps him down with a leg drop from off the ropes .. The Klaw now with a head lock is taunting the crowd as they boo ..."

SiD " Look at those horrible creatures The Klaw has brought down to the ring with him !!! What are they , they can not be human ??? Ewww they are so scary ... "

Guy " There his evil henchmen all would be world dominators have them ... Meanwhile , The Klaw is beating on Timebomb as Timebomb tries to escape from the ring ... Timebomb gets off an eye rake and rolls to the floor , and just as his feet hit the ground one of The Klaw's creatures attack him .."

SiD " Oh god yuck , that poor man .. He's gonna get herpes or something from them ..."

Guy " Timebomb retreats back into the ring as Henchman #1 tears off his wrestling boot .. The Klaw stomps on his foot and Timebomb is jumping around the ring ..."

SiD " This is like some kind of cartoon ... What is this Marvel comics now ???"

Guy " Timebomb recovers and foot sweeps The Klaw , then he grabs his boot and nails his opponent with it .. Timebomb beats The Klaw with his boot until he is bleeding and finally the ref makes him stop ..."

SiD " What it takes drawing blood for you to have to stop from using a weapon in the ring?"

Guy " Timebomb is trying to put his boot back on as The Klaw nails him with a double ax handle .. Timebomb holding on to the ropes as he is repeaditly kicked in the ribs . The Klaw chops Timebombs arm to get him to let go of the ropes and then delivers a suplex ... Body slam and a couple of other moves by The Klaw as the match continues ... After a missed elbow drop Timebomb gets the upper hand and returns to beating he just recieved to the bloody Klaw .."

SiD " Call him Klaw with a " C " "

Guy " Claw ???? "

SiD " Thats better , ha ha ...."

Guy " Timebomb with a whip into the corner follows with a big elbow that misses .. The Klaw spins around and wraps Timebomb up in a small package 1..2...3 HE GETS THE
PIN !!!! "

SiD " Well that was cheap ..."

Guy " Yeah what do ya want ..."

Winner : The Klaw
( Commercial Break )

Coming soon to The RMWF , nothing like you have ever seen before ... A new kind of sport , with competetors from around the globe and GALAXY !!!! Division X the super human league of the future !!! Also keep an eye out for our new football league , The XXFL in 2003 . With drunk naked cheerleaders , 8 on 8 football with lowest class of athletes ever on one field ...Hey , we encourage wife beating and cocaine use by our players ...

SiD " Well this new super hero thing should be stupid .... Whats next The Power
Rangers ??? "

Guy " Um well ..."

SiD " Oh yeah god we already did didn't we ..."

Guy " But anyway .. I think these new divisions might have promise and could possibly breath life back into this federation "

SiD " You would "

Guy " This just in the LSD / Darkstalka # 2 match is canceled do to LSD being a whiny bitch and quitting ..."

SiD " So whats new someone is always whinning and quiting ..."

Guy " Yeah well I'm sick of it . The Prez works hard signs these guys and they just waiste his time by quitting . LSD is upset that no one is paying attention to him ."

SiD " He didn't even have his first match yet , what does he exect ???"

Guy " Excactly , you got to make a name for yourself get noticed . You just can't sign up and expect tobe the most popular guy ... It pisses me off people are so stupid some times ."

SiD " How about all of the time ."

Guy " I guess , so lets go to a real match with two men who know how to stick it out and never give up ."

The Preacher Man -vs- Darkstalka
( The Preacher Man comes out on his motorcycle with Wild Kat dressed like a nun on the back ... Next , the lights cut off and the crowd goes wild as the original Darkstalka's music begins to play ... The dark one comes out pulling his casket full of weapons and shows no emotion of being happy to be back ... )

Guy " Here we go these two guys are no strangers to one another ... The Preacher Man is on Darkstalka like white on rice . The Preacher Man hits Darkstalka with a headbutt to the mid-section. The Preacher Man with an illegal chokehold on Darkstalka. Darkstalka nails The Preacher Man with a belly-to-back suplex. Darkstalka is back on his feet. They lockup. Darkstalka sends The Preacher Man to the corner of the ring. The Preacher Man pokes Darkstalka in the eyes. Darkstalka places The Preacher Man on the turnbuckle and executes the belly-to-back superplex. Now Darkstalka standing. Darkstalka puts The Preacher Man in a reverse chin lock. Ref #4 asks The Preacher Man if he quits. ... ... (AHHHH!) Darkstalka breaks the hold. He does a Tri-fecto ?? Darkstalka clotheslines The Preacher Man. Darkstalka uses a closed fist on The Preacher Man. Darkstalka nails The Preacher Man with a belly-to-back suplex. Darkstalka is up again. The Preacher Man climbs to his feet. The Preacher Man goes for a backdrop driver but Darkstalka dodges the attack. The Preacher Man drags Darkstalka to the floor. Ref #4 starts the count (.1) The Preacher Man cuts Darkstalka with a blade. Darkstalka is bleeding as a result. The Preacher Man hits a dragon suplex on Darkstalka. The Preacher Man is up again. The Preacher Man takes Darkstalka into the ring. Darkstalka moves back to his feet. Darkstalka uses a closed fist on The Preacher Man. Darkstalka nails The Preacher Man with a belly-to-back suplex. They lockup. Darkstalka sends The Preacher Man to the corner of the ring. The Preacher Man throws Darkstalka off the ropes and hits him with a cross-body block. Now The Preacher Man standing. The Preacher Man goes for a pin. Ref #4 counts. ...1 ...2 Darkstalka kicks out. Darkstalka is back on his feet. The Preacher Man and Darkstalka go to the floor Ref #4 starts the count (.1) (..2) The Preacher Man drives a forearm into Darkstalka. (...3) Darkstalka uses a closed fist on The Preacher Man. (....4) Darkstalka is hit with a backward kick. Darkstalka moves back to his feet. Darkstalka pump handle slams The Preacher Man to the floor. The Preacher Man moves back to his feet. They head back into the ring. Darkstalka punches The Preacher Man in the head. The Preacher Man nails Darkstalka with a belly-to-back suplex. The Preacher Man gets back to his feet. They lockup. The Preacher Man sends Darkstalka to the corner of the ring. The Preacher Man picks up Darkstalka and hits him with a Back Suplex. The Preacher Man chants start. The Preacher Man moves back to his feet. Darkstalka is up again. The Preacher Man apllies the camel clutch on Darkstalka. The referee is checking the situation. ... ... Darkstalka is fighting the hold. ... (AHHHH!) The Preacher Man breaks the hold. The Preacher Man tackles Darkstalka. Darkstalka is up again. The Preacher Man dropkicks Darkstalka. The Preacher Man climbs to his feet. Darkstalka moves back to his feet. The Preacher Man pins Darkstalka against the ropes and chokes him with his forearm. The Preacher Man hits Darkstalka with a heart punch. The Preacher Man chants start. The Preacher Man apllies the camel clutch on Darkstalka. Ref #4 asks Darkstalka if he quits. ... ... Darkstalka is fighting the hold. ... (AHHHH!) ... The Preacher Man tightens the hold. ... ... ... ... ... Darkstalka is fighting the hold. ... (AHHHH!) Darkstalka taps out.

The Preacher Man

Rebel -vs- Ashura ( World Title )
Guy " Here we go for the maim event , Ashura comes out after Rebel had made his way to the ring ... "

SiD " Ashura is coming off a big loss to Armz in a non-title match ... Lets she if she can rebound and defend her title . After getting naked .."

Guy " Just as I think your gonna say something intelligent you prove me wrong ... Ashura starts the match off before the bell with a hurricana kick .. Rebel is stunned but manages to rip off Ashura's heavy weight belt which she has not taken off yet . Ashura ingnores the belt and rips into Rebel with a fury of blows and kicks .."

SiD " Oh man she is not taking any prisoners tonight ..."

Guy " Rebel barley defends off Ashura with his head still intact but he manges a foot sweep and takes Ashura down .. Rebel in for a boot to the mid-section as Ashura throws a punch .. Both wrestlers land there blows but Rebel gets the worst of it recieving a fist in the balls .. He crawls over to the side of the ring and leans over the ropes .."

SiD " He just coughed up blood ..."

Guy " Ashura launches herself at Rebel decapitating him on the ropes with her legs and staying there choking him ... Rebel showa a great deal of strenght and catapults Ashura off him .. He stumbles over to her and lands a quick elbow drop before she can get out of the way ..."

SiD " Ih hes gonna win this match hes gonna have to be quick ..."

Guy " Rebel slaps on a figure four , which is a smart move . It will give him much needed rest and take a toll on the hot and fired up Ashura ... Ashura won't tap out as the ref checks , Rebel aplies as much pressure as he can muster up as he is in much pain also ."

SiD " We have been treated to two great main events in the last two weeks , both with Ashura but no nudity , COME ON !!!! "

Guy " Rebel is only interested in that belt he could care less if Ashura is naked or not ... He still has her in the figure four but soon lets up knowing the only way to beat Ashura is with a pin fall .. Rebel struggles to scoop slam Ashura then gets down on one knee for a choke hold .."

SiD " You can tell he is still hurting from that ball punch Ashura gave him , she did not pull that one ..."

Guy " Rebel lets up on the choke hold and swings Ashura into the ropes , she ducks a clotheline and slips behing Rebel rolling him up in a small package , 1..2...3 NO the ref is showing only a two count .. Looked like she had him to me ... Ashura complaining to the ref about a slow count costs her as Rebel double ax handles her from behind .. Then he scoops her up for a backwards shoulder slam .. Rebel rolls over only to recieve a boot in the head but recovers with a head butt to Ashura's privates ..."

SiD " Idiot she does not have anything down there what was the point of that ..."

Guy " It was the only thing in range .."

SiD " He just wanted an excuse to have his head down there , lucky man ..."

Guy " Ashura and Rebel still slugging it out on the ground as they exchange blows .. Ashura gets a foot into Rebels face and draws blood from his nose . Rebel just shrugs it off and jumps on Ashura as they roll around the ring .."

SiD " This has been a brawl from the start and it is only getting worse .."

Guy " Rebel is up to his feet but Ashura tackles him back down to the ground and starts beating his face into the mat ... She then picks him up and power bombs him before climbing to the top rope ... A short pause as the crowd grows silent and Ashura launches herself towards Rebel , he rolls out of the way and Ashura crashes to the mat .. Rebel goes for the pin but Ashura kicks out at 2 ... Rebel can't believe it and slaps on a camel clutch which we know Ashura is not gonna give up from ..."

SiD " Rebel is just tired and does not know what else to do .."

Guy " Ashura is fightning the pain and shows no signs of giving up ... Rebel is turning red he is applying so much pressure ."

SiD " The bell just rang what was that ???"

Guy " Rebel jumps up and grabs the belt ??? What is going on Ashura did not give up ??"

SiD " Ashura is going after the ref , she is pissed !!!"

Guy " Lets get the official word from Gary Coleman .."

Gary " Ladies and Gentelmen YOUR NEW WORLD HEAVY WEIGHT CHAMPION , REBEL !!!!"

Guy " I guess the ref decided for Ashura had enough for her ... "

SiD " Whay a jip my poor chocolate ball of love got ripped off ..."

Guy " Ashura just choked slammed the ref as Rebel spins her around and KISSES HER !!! She swipes at Rebel as he runs off with her belt ..."

Winner and New Champ : Rebel

RMWF

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Page Updated Sat May 19, 2001 6:38am EDT