Wednsday Night Havok 10-25-00 - Wrestling - http://maxpages.com/rmwfarchives/10_25_00_Wednsday_Night

" Good evening folks this is Guy Mandell as ever with SiD Nasty coming to you live from Universal Studios Orlando, Florida for the latest edition of Wedsnday Night Havok .. Tonight's show marks the return of Triple H along with a Women's Champ Belt and European match featuring Black Widow finally not to mention a match for the Intercontinental Belt "

SiD " Can I make a suggestion Guy "

Guy " Sure I guess "

SiD " Could you try to shut up and stop delaying the goddamn matches???? "

Guy " Only if you could stop being an asshole for a full minute "

SiD " Suck my ass "

Jackass -vs- Areala
( Jackass runs down to the ring and slides in then starts fliping the crowd off. Next out is Areala who is stopped by referee Gary Coleman and not allowed in the ring until she hands her sword over to him. )

Sid " That nun bitch is hot you think she's friends with the Preacher Man???? "

Guy " No .. I don't think she is "

SiD " Jackass drop-kicks Areala but she nun-blocks it!!!!! "

Guy " Nun-block???? "

SiD " Well .. I'm trying to be f---ing creative .. Get off my back!!!! "

Guy " Before he has a chance to get up she gives him a knee to the groin!!!! Now an inside toe-lock!!!! Jackass grabs her by the head and slams her face to the mat!!!! "

SiD " Yeah smack that ho for hurting your boys!!!! "

Guy " Jackass leaps to his feet and stomps her in the back!!!!! She rolls out of the way and charges him with a clothesline!!!! She's off the ropes and cross-body blocks him!!!! "

SiD " Jackass is getting beat by a girl .. I love it!!! "

Guy " Know who I saw the other day???? "

SiD " Your mom in the projects sucking dick for crack???? "

Guy " f--- you .. No .. I saw Arn Anderson outside of a McDonalds panhandling "

SiD " HA!!! "

Guy " I felt bad for the guy so I bought him a quarter pounder "

SiD " That's it???? You didn't even get him a value meal???? "

Guy " Well no "

SiD " You cheap bastard "

Guy " Jackass with a powerbomb to Areala!!!! Now he's choking her with his foot!!!! She puts her foot to his balls and kicks him off of her!!!!!

SiD " Shit!!! Leave the poor guy's nuts alone already!!!!! "

Guy " She runs at him from behind but Jackass Mule Kicks her!!!!! He slides over to her and tries to Donkey suplex her but she grabs him and reverses it to a Spanish Inquisition!!!! "

SiD " I wasn't expecting a Spanish Inquisition "

Guy " .... "

Three Catholics Preists in Red " NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!! "

Guy " Oh God "

SiD " Hehe "

Guy " These shows are getting dumber and dumber "

SiD " Hehe "

Guy " Jackass whips Areala against the ropes .. She comes back with a Crucifix!!!! She pins him out!!!!! "

Winner: Areala
Guy " That was a pretty good match for the night's first "

SiD " Know what else is a good match???? "

Guy " No .. What???? "

SiD " Your face and my ass "

Guy " ANYWAY .. The next match is about to begen "

SiD " 'Your face and my ass' hehe "

Triple H -vs- X-Terminator
( 'Thong Song' hits the PA then the thunder of a motorcycle arises as X-Terminator rides out on his bike. He parks it and climbs into the ring Next Triple H and Stephanie McMahon walk out. )

Guy " Triple H stops outside of the ring and glances the motorcycle then into X-Terminator's eyes .. He's picking the bike up!!!! Thunderhurst Helmsley slams X's bike on the concrete floor!!!!! X-Terminator charges at him and does a moonsault off the top rope and catches Hunter and Stephanie!!!! Hunter checks to see it she's okay and X-Terminator comes up from behind with a steel chair and smacks him over the head with it!!!! All this and the match hasn't even officially started yet!!!! "

SiD " Well .. When a guy smashes your hog you don't have time to wait for bells .. You just go and f--- him up "

Guy " I didn't know you ride "

SiD " Well .. I don't .. I'm just saying .. Nevermind .. f--- you "

Guy " X-Terminater sidewalk-slams Triple H and chases it with a big-boot!!!! Hunter gets to his feet and uppercuts X .. The exchange blows for awhile until Hunter sends X-Terminator to the mat with a Japanese leg-drag!!!! "

Sid " I have to take a s--- "

Guy " Too much information there SiD "

SiD " Shut up .. I'll be back "

Guy " No need to hurry "

SiD " Go to hell "

Guy " Triple H climbs the turnbuckle but X-Terminator monkey-flips him before he can do anything!!!! X with a running leg-drop!!!!! Hunter gets back up and whips X-Terminator over the top rope onto the floor .. Helmsley with a big splash!!!! Now he's dragging X over to his smashed up motorcycle .. He picks the bike up again and slams it down at X-Terminator .. Who rolls out of the way just in time!!!! X drop-kicks Triple H then follows with an elbow drop .. A knee-drop .. Stephenie runs over and begins to beg X-Terminator to ease up on her man .. He throws her a right hook and send her flying!!!! Hunter grabs X by the throat as he gets to his feet .. He slams X to the concrete and stomps him "

SiD " I'm back asshole "

Guy " Lucky us "

SiD " f--- you you f---ing bitch "

Guy " Damn .. You seem meaner than usual "

SiD " Die "

Guy " Why me??? "

SiD " Because you're a bitch "

Guy " X-Terminator with an amply named X-Terminator Bomb...1...2...3!!!! Triple H loses "

Winner: X-Terminator
Guy " It's a shame Triple H lost his return match "

SiD " It's a shame little bitches like you and him are alive "

Guy " ....... "

Harlowe and Balls Mahoney -vs- Omega-Fro
( Big Balls by AC/DC hits The PA as Balls Mahoney sashe`s his way down the catwalk moment later Harlowe steps out with Blade and the three of them make their way to the ring. Omega-Fro comes out as explosions burst stage-side and he makes his way to his opponents. Balls pulls down the mic. )

SiD " I'd like to know what is up with that Balls guy "

Guy " What do you mean???? "

SiD " The guy's a clown!!!!! Why the hell is he even here???? To shame this fed even more???? "

Guy " He isn't THAT bad .. Try lightening up "

SiD " Try sucking my f---ing dick bitch "

Guy " Again with the gay talk "

SiD " Dude .. f--- you I ain't in the mood "

Guy " Whatever "

Balls " Hey Harlowe you know how this is supposed to be a handicap match and shit???? Us versus Omega-Fro??? Change of plans pal "

SiD " What???? "

Guy " Balls punches Harlowe in the face!!!!! "

SiD " That's f---ed up .. Not that I give a f--- "

Guy " Harlowe looks upset "

SiD " He's crying "

Guy " No he isn't .. Balls punches Harlowe in the head again and the bell rings .. Omega-Fro goes after Harlowe with a running elbow!!!! Now Balls is just standing there picking his nose while Omega-Fro scoop-slams Harlowe and then knee-drops him .. Omega trys to stomp him but Harlowe grabs his foot!!!!! Harlowe is hopping on his other then Omega gives him a leg-breaker!!!! "

SiD " Good "

Guy " Balls decides to get involved and runs up to Harlowe and grabs him by the back of the head and flings him into the ropes!!!!! Followed by a clothesline!!!! Blade arm-drags Balls as Omega runs over and victory rolls Harlowe .. Harlowe pulls himself up by the ropes as Blade throat-tackles Omega causing him to bounce off the ropes and into Harlowe .. They both go down but Omega turns it to his advantage and applies a reverse chin-lock to Harlowe .. Hey SiD mind earning your keep???? "

SiD " f--- you "

Guy " Hey .. Have you been drinking???? "

SiD " As a matter of fact I have been .. MOTHER "

Guy " Mind telling me what you've been drinking???? "

SiD " Old Velvet "

Guy " Whiskey???? I don't think the Prez is going to be too thrilled with you drinking on the job .. Much less your AA councelor "

SiD " Well if you don't tell them they won't know now will they???? "

Guy " We're on TV SiD "

SiD " Shut up "

Guy " Omega Fro DDTs Harlowe and Balls does a big-splash on both of them "

SiD " Yeah .. Hurt your partner Balls .. That's it "

Guy " Blade with a fisherman's suplex to Balls!!!! Harlowe steps in and powerbombs OF!!! Omega gets up and is drop-kicked by both Harlowe and Blade!!!! Harlowe pounces on him with a pin ...1...2...3!!!! That's it for Omega Fro!!!! "

Winner: Harlowe
SiD " Well that was fun .. What the fuck do we have next???? "

Guy " IC Belt match "

SiD " Oh joy "

Guy " Hey where'd Harlowe disappear to???? "

SiD " Your mom's big pussy???? "

Guy " Shut up "

SiD " Fuck you "

Blade -vs- Kid Money
( comes on the PA as Kid Money makes his way to the ring showing off his recently won IC belt. Blade is standing in the ring from the last match with his arms crossed. )

Guy " There goes Blade at the bell after Kid Money .. Kid Money draws a gun but drops it as Blade plows into him!!!! "

SiD " Can that kid not fight without a gun or something???? "

Guy " He can "

SiD " Shut up "

Guy " Kid Money power-bombs Blade then knee-drops him Blade slides out of the ring and provokes KM to follow .. Kid Money with a hurricanrana but Blade moves away just in time .. He pulls a two by four from under the ring and cross-checks Kid with it!!!! "

SiD " More under the ring weapons .. I should see if that midget under their needs an apprentice .. This job's pay sucks "

Guy " Hey .. It pays the bills .. Beats working day-labor "

SiD " True .. But where are all the perks we were promised???? We don't even have any groupies for Christ's sake!!!! "

Guy " I have some "

SiD " WHAT?!?!?! How the fuck do you have groupies?!?!?! "

Guy " It's easy .. It's called 'don't be an asshole to everyone and then people will like you' "

SiD " I'm nice though "

Guy " Yeah .. Ok "

SiD " I AM you fucking bitch!!!!! "

Guy " Blade gorilla-press slams Kid Money followed by a shin-breaker!!!! Kid gets up and whips Blade into the barriers "

SiD " Kid does a running drop-kick but Blade moves out of the way and he goes into the crowd and ends up kicking some old bat in the head!!!! Way to go slick!!!"

Guy " Kid Money climbs his way out of the groping fans and him and Blade lock up .. Blade snap-suplexes Kid!!!! On his feet again Kid jumps up on the apron and does a Sunset-flip on Blade!!!!! Kid picks him up by the head Harlowe appears from under the ring and DDTs Kid Money!!!! "

SiD " He was probably under there smoking crack with that midget "

Guy " Kid money Cash-Kicks Harlowe and then head-butts Blade .. Blade returns with a drop-kick to the Kid .. Harlowe applies a figure-four to Kid!!!!! "

Guy " Harlowe and Blade are both stomping the crap out of Kid Money!!!! "

SiD " Kid's reaches into his pants and pulls out another gun!!!! He shoots Harlowe in the gut!!!! He gets up and pistol-whips Blade!!!! He gives him a knee-drop and then a Million Dollar Dream!!!! There's the three count!!!! "

Guy " Kid keeps his belt .. Hey who's that coming out from under the ring???? "

SiD " What is there a fucking party under there or something????? I bet Harlowe and that guy were fucking each .. Holy shit!!!! Is that Violater????? "

Guy " Yes .. It is!!!! "

SiD " I thought he was dead "

Guy " The under-the-ring midget comes out chasing Violator .. He has the midget's cattle prod .. Violator runs and zapps Kid Money who falls to the ground!!!!! He grabs the IC Belt and takes off!!!!! The midget is running after him!!!! "

Winner: Kid Money
SiD " That was cheap .. I want to know what the hell goes on under the rings!!!! "

Guy " I would'nt mind knowing either .. Moving right along though we have Black Widow next up going for the European and Women's Belts "

SiD " Now let me get this straight .. That Russian broad .. Wants the Women's belt and the European .. She is the number one Heavy Height contender and she's been bitching for weeks now for a shot at the lowest of all the belts "

Guy " Well .. I guess she wants to start off at the bottom and work her way up .. Who knows "

SiD " I say let Black Widow have them both .. Ashura skipped town and wanted to take the belts with her if you ask me "

Guy " I didn't .. Take a nap or something "

SiD " I think that's the first good idea you've had in all the years I've known you "

Black Widow -vs- Ashura
( The Soviet national anthem hits the PA as The Black Widow appears and walks down the runway to the ring ignoring the boos from the crowd. A moment later 'Breaking Things' by Limp Bizkit fills the arena as Ashura comes out and goes to the ring. The fans go wild at her much awaited return.)
Guy " This should be a good match .. Both wrestler's are two of this fed's finest "

SiD " And they're both chicks .. RRROOOWWWRRR!!!!! "

Guy " I think you should show a little bit more respect to them .. One of these days someones going to force you out of retirement if you don't learn to control that mouth of your "

SiD " Oh shut the fuck up will you??? I still am the King and can do whatever and say whatever the hell I want "

Guy " Keep dreaming .. There's the bell .. Ashura rushes Black widow with a drop-kick that sends her into the ropes!!!!! Black Widow bounces off them and returns with a flying helicoptor kick!!!! "

SiD " I hope they rip each other's clothes off "

Guy " I think you just need to get laid "

SiD " I got laid last week as a matter of fact "

Guy " What??? Who in the world would have sex with you??? Was it a hooker??? "

SiD " Nope .. Was that girl Leah .. We went out and a few stories later she f---ed me .. I still got it!!!! "

Guy " Hahahaha!!!! You probably have it all now ..Oh god .. That's just too funny "

SiD " What???? I'm a pimp!!!!! "

Guy " Yeah okay SiD .. Ashura with a cross-body block to Widow followed by a figure-four leg-lock!!!! Black Widow flips over and breaks the hold!!!! She Russian suplexes Ashura then off the ropes with a leg-drop but Ashura rolls out of the way then kicks Widow in the ribs!!!! "

SiD " HMMMM!!! How much fo one rib???? "

Guy " Stop it SiD "

SiD " Fuck you .. Did you not hear my 'I am the King and can do whatever and say whatever I want' statement???? "

Guy " Black Widow with a Stalingrad Sting followed by a double-jab windmill kick combo!!!! Ashura stumbles back and shakes her head clear before faking a left hook then snap-maring Widow to the mat!!!! Ashura leaps out of the ring and grabs the broken tailpipe of X-Terminator's motorcycle "

SiD " Black Widow scoffs at her then swings over the ropes with a Sputnik Splash!!!! Ashura smacks her with the tailpipe .. It's a homerun!!!! Ashura drew first blood!!!! "

Guy " I have to admit that was clever of you renaming the Widow's moonsault that way "

SiD " I know .. I'm a clever guy "

Guy " With a sneer Ashura walks over to Widow who's still on the ground and starts clubbing her!!!! Black Widow starts to block then grabs Ashura with her legs leaps up and head-butts her!!!! She grabs Ashura's neck and slams her face into the apron!!!! "

SiD " Now they're both bleeding .. Why can't they just get nekkid and roll around "

Guy " Cause this isn't GLOW??? "

SiD " Well it should be .. Now that was a fed "

Guy " Hey what's Riley doing out there????? "

SiD " Huh???? Oh .. It's that fake Riley again .. Looks like he taking parts from X-Terminator's trashed bike "

Guy " He's acting all bazaar again "

SiD " Yeah .. He's Bizarro Riley "

Guy " Now who saw that one coming??? "

SiD " I did "

Guy " Anyway .. Black Widow Russian suplexes Ashura but she reverses it to a German one!!!!! Then gives her a few stomps for luck .. Black Widow slides back into the ring and into the ropes as Ashura quickly follows .. Widow leaps at her with an Iron Curtain but Ashura ducks it!!!! She scoop-slams Widow and slaps on an arm-wrench!!!! Widow reaches over .. with her other arm and rakes Ashura's eyes!!!! Ashura releases her and hold's her eyes "

SiD " Widow starts stomping her .. Ashura grabs her boot though and shoves her away .. She looks PISSED!!!! "

Guy " Ashura runs up to her and delivers an unavoidable side-kick!!!!! "

SiD " You're my unavoidable side-kick "

Guy " Funny .. Widow grabs Ashura and flings her into the turnbuckle .. She grabs her throat and reverse monkey flips her!!!!! Now Widow's leaving the ring .. What is she doing????? Ashura gets up and gives her an atomic elbow from the top rope!!!!! Widow does a tumble away from here to the nearby motorcycle wreckage "

SiD " Shouldn't the janitor have cleaned that up by now???? "

Guy " He was found dead last week remember???? "

SiD " Oh yeah "

Guy " Widow rips a fistfull of wires from the bike as Ashura DDT's her from behind!!!! She pulls Widow to her feet by the hair .. Black Widow headbutts her!!!!! She slips around Ashura and wraps the wires around her neck!!!!! Ashura flips her over but it just takes them both down because Widow's grip isn't loosening!!!! "

SiD " Dude!!!!! She's going to kill her!!!!!! "

Guy " Hey there's Madman!!!! What's he doing here???? "

SiD " He's just standing at the top of the catwalk staring down at Ashura .. He's not rubbing his crotch is he???? "

Guy " I don't even want to know "

SiD " Well it doesn't matter .. He's leaving now "

Guy " Ashura's starting to look a little sluggish .. Widow releases the wires and tosses Ashura aside!!!!! Widow walks over to the ring and pulls a steel chair out from under it and returns to Ashura .. She goes to smack her with it but Ashura kicks her in the stomach .. The chair falls on Ashura's head as Black widow hits the concrete!!!!! "

SiD " Damn .. They're just fucking each other up aren't they???? "

Guy " Both wrestlers are slow to get back up .. Ashura reaches into her pocket and pulls something out "

SiD " What she got a gun???? "

Guy " No .. It's a lighter "

SiD " This is no time for a cigarette "

Guy " She lights it and tosses it at the motorcycle remains which has been leaking gasoline for awhile now "

SiD " Aww man "

Guy " Widow gets to her feet and starts walking over to Ashura oblivious as to what she did "

SiD " BOOOM!!!!! The bike explodes!!!!! Black Widow and Ashura both are knocked in opposite directions as flaming shrapnel rains on the audience!!!!! People are panicking and being impaled and burned alive!!!! It's like fucking Beruit out there!!!! "

Guy " Jesus "

RMWF

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Page Updated Sat May 19, 2001 6:38am EDT