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Halloween Jokes


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Most of these Halloween jokes are real groaners (get it, Halloween.... GROANERS hahahaha hehehe uhhh yeah) anyway...

Q. Why was the student vampire tired in the morning?
A. Because he was up all night studying for his blood test!!!

Q. Why should a skeleton drink 10 glasses of milk a day?
A. It's good for the bones.

Q. Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?
A. They're afraid of flying off the handle!

Q. Why don't skeletons like parties?
A. They have no body to dance with.

Q. Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A. They're good at keeping things under wraps.

Q. Why do vampires drink blood?
A. Because coffee keeps them awake all day!

Q. Why doesn't Dracula have any friends?
A. Because he's a pain in the neck!

Q. Why did the mummy call the doctor?
A. Because he was coffin.

Q. Why did the ghost go to the doctor?
A. To get his boo-ster shot?

Q. Why are there fences around cemeteries?
A. Because people are dying to get in.

Q. Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
A. His ghoul friend.

Q. Where does Dracula water ski?
A. On Lake Erie

Q. Where does Count Dracula make his withdrawals?
A. At the blood bank.

Q. When does a ghost need a license?
A. During "haunting" season.

Q. What's a haunted chicken?
A. A poultry-geist.

Q. What was the witches' favorite subject in school?
A. Spelling

Q. What would you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman?
A. A dead ringer.

Q. What do little ghosts drink?
A. Evaporated milk.

Q. What type of coffee do vampires prefer?
A. Decoffinated!

Q. What time would it be if five demons were chasing you?
A. Five after one.

Q. What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
A. Boo boos

Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice Scream

Q. What kind of boat pulls Dracula when he water skis?
A. A blood vessel

Q. How did the ghost patch his sheet?
A. With a pumpkin patch.

Q. What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A. Don't spook until your spooken to.

Q. What did the Mommy Vampire say to the Baby Vampire?
A. "You are driving me batty."

Q. What did the monster eat after the dentist pulled his tooth?
A. The dentist!

Q. What do ghouls order at McMonsters?
A. Handburgers.

Q. What do spooks call their Navy?
A. The ghost guard.

Q. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
A. Squash


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