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| Signs of A Drinking Problem |
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| These may be signs of a drinking problem...... You have to hold on to the lawn to keep from falling off the earth. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat. You sincerely believe that alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group. When you can focus better with on eye closed. The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar. Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops. The glass keeps missing your mouth. Bill clinton starts to make sense. Vampires catch a buzz after attacking you. At and AA meeting you begin: "Hi, my name is...uh..." Your idea of cutting back is less salt. Thw whole bar says "hi" when you walk in. You think the Four Basic Food Groups are: Caffeine, Nicotene, Alcohol, and women. Every night you find your roommate's cat more and more attractive. "Hi ocifer. I'm not under the affluence on incohol." "I'm not drunk, you're just sober!" "That damned pink elephant followed me home again." You have a reserved parking space at the liqour store. You've fallen and you can't get up. |
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