What one mysterious substance can make you smarter, faster, attractive, successful, rich, famous, and better in bed? I don't really know. But I can tell you that you have got to try my new product, crucial in the secret agent training process, called Mystery Girl's Mysterious Mystery Powder of Mystery.
For the mysteriously low price of only 8 easy payments of $36.95 plus $4.95 shipping and handling you can get a month's supply of this amazing, miracle inducing powder. It's better than 12 years in Secret Agent Academy! I guarantee that this wonderful, completely natural, rectally taken remedy will make you more mysterious than ever or your money back.
To release the mysterious effects of the powder, simply follow these three easy steps:
1)Fill your enema bag (not included) with 2 liters boiling hot water, 1 cup apple cider vinegar, and 1 teaspoon Mystery Girl's Mysterious Powder of Mystery.
2)Stick it up your ass!
3) Repeat daily. Enjoy!
You're probably thinking, what exactly does this do? What exactly is in it? Why should I buy this miracle drug? Well, I don't really know that either. But I can tell you that millions of suckers, er...i mean my clients all over the world are more mysterious because of this amazing stuff! Many mysterious celebrities that are so famous and mysterious that you have never even heard of them use it to increase the mysteriousness level.
To order, call toll free: 1-800-MYS-TERY. Credit card/money order accepted. Please make all checks payable to Mysteryland Inc. Sorry, no CODs.
This powder is truly more powerful than God. How do I know? Because I am not only the president, I am also a client! |