Mels Movie Reviews - Jokes - http://maxpages.com/melsjokes/My_Movie

Since i have nothing else to do with my time i thought i'd review some of the movies which i have seen in my lifetime, which will probably end up being tons... i have a lot of spare time...

Anyway, these reviews may often spoil the movie for you if you havent seen it, but really, who the hell cares...

Mel

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THE FAMILY MAN (Nick Cage and Tea Leoni)

I love it when i walk out of a movie with a satisfied feeling (no not that u sicko's)... i mean when the movie is actually worth the money... and seeing a Cage movie, usually does leave that feeling... For example, Snake eyes was good, The Rock, Con Air etc etc... these were all good movies, which i have wanted to come back and see for a second time, so there i was, Hoyts, Sydney, on a holiday with my boyfriend and my Best friend and her boyfriend, anticipating a great movie, and did it leave that satisfied feeling???????
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NO

From the beginning, i knew it was going to be a modern day scrooge story, u know, the typical xmas thing, where he finds out what his life would be like if he hadnt gone to london and left his girlfriend 13 years ago... and in a "glimpse" as they call it, he goes from being a rich businessman, to a less than rich husband of his old gf (Leoni).
The obvious happens, he falls in love again etc etc, and it is actually a kinda entertaining movie, which i could stand watching... until the ending... where it lost all of its appeal...
You see these "glimpses" cant last forever and one day he awakens to find he is a businessman again... so he goes and finds her etc etc etc...

"What was so bad about the ending??" u ask??
It was so (been done before) if you get what i mean... I mean come on... arnt you sick of those happy crappy endings?? i know i am... and this was your typical chick flick, slighly entertaining, but to no extent Great...

I was quite dissapointed in Cage, as i know he can do better... Tea Leoni was actually quite charming. But then again, i have been a fan of her since "The Naked Truth"...

I give this movie a 5/10... and still, most of that is for seeing cage and Leoni in 70's dorky clothing in the beginning of the movie...

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THE NEXT BEST THING (Starring Madonna, and the gay guy from my best friends wedding) :

When my friend suggested we get this movie, i kept an open mind, after all, Madonna was half entertaining in Evita. So i said "yes, sounds like a good movie..."
But little did i know, that my night was going to be ruined...
From the very beginning of the movie, it was slow, dull, and i am yet to know what the hell the point of it was?? I knew after 5 min it was going to be a MAJOR flop... but i thought.."No, i'll give it a little while, it should get better..." ... ... ... but it didnt, in fact it got quite worse...

"Why did you watch the whole thing then Mel??" i hear you ask...? Well the only answer i can come up to that question is that it was kinda fun laughing at it.
Madonna attemps to portray a rather sophisticated character... to no avail... her acting is horrible, it is quite painful to watch.

The main story line of this movie is Two best friends Madonna, and the gay guy, have a wild passionate fling one night, well far from passionate actually, more alcohol induced, and she discovers that she is pregnant.. and they both raise the child as friends, etc etc it goes on, la de da de da, until she meets another man, whom she soon gets engaged with and decides to move half way across the country with him... and the child, obviously the father is cut up and they get in this big court case only to discover that he is actually not the father after all... suprise suprise.. (come on it is a madonna movie...) and he is unable to see him again etc etc... it goes on like this until a rather crappy ending, where she lets him have dinner with the kid.. then it ends... no resolution, no f**king point...

In my opinion, Madonna should stick to singing, oh no wait, thats just as bad, how about she just retire... she's too old anyway... and the sexually allocated scenes actually make the viewer want to be sick..

This seriously is one of the worst movies that i have ever seen in my life, i give it a 0/10.
Trust me, dont bother spending the money on hiring out this movie, the only thing you'll laugh at is Madonna's acting...

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WHAT WOMEN WANT (Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt)

Now I have always been a big fan of Mel Gibson… don’t ask me why, I know, he’s a bit old for me.. hehe.. It must be cause he’s an Aussie. Anyway, I was actually not expecting very much of this movie, I saw the trailer, and wasn’t expecting much at all…
But I was pleasantly surprised… I found it to be quite an entertaining movie. Gibson plays a humorous character very well.. It is good to see that there are still a few actors left that can actually act more than one character…
Gibson plays a rather selfish worker for a media advertising company.. Helen Hunt is hired to take the job he wants, so he tries to figure a way to outdo her… only instead he ends up zapping himself in his bathroom with the hairdryer after he dresses up as a woman to get into the “woman’s mind”…he slips into the tub, and ZAP, all of a sudden he can read women’s thoughts…

Now I know that this is a corny storyline, I know that, but I was impressed that they could make such a corny storyline and turn it into a generally funny movie…

Gibson is really charming and funny. And is able to deliver puns and jokes very well.

Hunt, is as she usually is, quite suited for this part. And it is good to see that in a movie they pair two people up who are around the same age… (Example: Entrapment… I like sean connery and Catherine Zeta Jones, but MY GOD… YUCK).

So they actually were really suited together in the movie… which was good to see.

I give this movie a 8/10. I really enjoyed it. It looses points though, for the ending… it was yet another movie which just ended abruptly… I hate that.

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mel@melsjokes.com

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Page Updated Wed Feb 7, 2001 4:54am EST