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| Blonde Jokes |
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| One-Armed Blonde How do you make a one arm blonde fall out of a tree? Wave to her! Blonde Girl on Her Way to Jamaica A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, 'I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica.' The stewardess gets the head stewardess who asks the woman to leave and she says 'I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica.' The stewardesses don't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the co-pilot. The co- pilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head stewardess asks the co-pilot what he said to get her to move. The co-pilot replies, 'I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica'. Air Conditioning What do you call four blondes in a car? Air conditioning. How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? You knock on the door. Laptop What's the difference between a blonde and Windows 95? The blonde operates on more laptops. Baking Chocolate Chip Cookies How can you tell when a blonde has been baking chocolate chip cookies? There's M&M Shells all over the floor. Vanna and blondes Q: Why do Blondes wanna be like Vanna White? A: So they can learn how to Spell! Breadcrumbs in the Toilet Why does the blonde throw breadcrumbs in the toilet every morning? To feed the toilet duck! Cucumber Q: How can you tell if a blonde's been in your fridge? A: Lipstick on the cucumbers Zebra What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Spot Why did the blonde build a bridge across the river? So she could have shade when she swam across. Joke What's the difference between a blonde and a Kit Kat Bar? You only get 4 fingers in a Kit Kat bar. What does a peroxide blonde and a 747 have in common? They both have a black box! Chainsaw What do you call a blond with a Chainsaw? Dead. Bearbottle What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up! How are a blonde's legs like a convenience store? They are always open. Blonde vs Mosquito What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it. Blonde With Leather Jacket What do you call a blonde with a leather jacket? A rebel without a clue. Square Boobs Why did the blonde have square boobs? She forgot to take the tissue out of the box. Big Hoop Earrings Why do blondes wear big hoop earnings? So guys have somewhere to put their feet. Row boat One day a blonde was rowing a row boat out in a wheat feild. Another blonde pulled up in her car. she got out and said "hey its your kinds of blondes that make my kind of blondes look bad. And if i knew how to swim i come out there and beat you up". Drown blonde How do you drown a blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool. |
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