Luci's Page

by cosmo

		Hello :-) this is just a site so I can have a calender on whats going on at any given time I have found a lot of things that I should have been doing all along but for some reason stopped doing them and didn't do things that I wanted to do cause it would cut into my time with that special person. I know now that was hurtful to everyone and it's time to start them back up again...I wonder what saturday would be good for my sister to have our monthly day out...and I should probably get pepper spray again so it's a little safer for me to go on my "alone with my dad" jogs. I am sorry to everyone I hurt I wish I could make it up to you all. this really feels kinda good to be able to just write what I'm feeling so that I feel like I'm talking to someone eventhough that someone is myself
Things I want to do in the next couple months Go to New York for a weekend Go to kings dominion or hershey park for a weekend or both (if not staying in hotel in NY otherwise just for the day) Stay in Hotel with big 2-person tub for one of the trips (gotta do something fun with the raise eventhough it's not gonna be much really but still enough to do something fun one weekend)
		Motorcycle Update Hopefully I'll be able to get my motorcycle license by the end up this summer...Keep your fingers crossed
avoiding the world one day at a time while trying to get my life back to normal. I've realized on my much needed jogs just how much I've changed since last winter/spring, for the worse and I can't quite figure out why it happened but it did so now its time to try and get back to my normal happy self. It will be hard after loosing the love of my life for the second time but hopefully not impossible after all I am strong, if I can get through my best friends, dads, and hero's death all in one I can get through anything right? I'm just tired of crying all the time to go from 5 years of only crying twice (both when leaving people who meant a lot to me) to breaking out in tears every time I'm driving and spontaneously any other time is a huge difference. After all in order for someone else to love you you must first love yourself right? I think thats how the saying goes....anyway its time to start loving myself...at least liking myself I just wish someone would have slapped me in the face sooner so I could have fixed things before they got this bad

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Page Updated Sun Apr 23, 2006 7:43pm EDT