It was the evening of Valentines Day. The horizon was beautiful. Filled with pink clouds nearest to the earth. Purple clouds seeming to spread out after the pink. It was a sunset to remember.
She walked into the room. People were standing, dancing, talking. She was young, not quite a woman, but certainly no child. Her heart, mind, and soul were greatly aged. Wise with her past experiences. Wise because of the life she had.
Dressed in black, she looked the best she had in a very long time. Glitter was in her short, black hair. With just the slightest sign of curls showing. Her dress went down to her ankles and had long sleeves with a hood that looked like a cape when it set just right on her shoulders. She wore black boots on her feet; she was never one to wear dress shoes.
Almost everybody in the room she knew. At one time or another, they all knew her too. They were all past friends of hers. She remembered them well. They didn't seem to remember her though. None of them even acknowledged that she was there.
Some were in groups. Talking; laughing at each other's jokes. Others were dancing. Looking into thier soul mate's eyes with so much love. It was like they were drowning in a sea of love. Once in awhile, a person or group would go talk to others that were there.
At one table, there was a couple talking to each other and watching the others in the room. She was with child, but most couldn't tell. He was a young man. Not much older than twenty. Many could see the love and happiness in his eyes when they looked at him. These were friends she remembered well; the girl had been her best friend ever for a long time. But the friendship grew apart until it was no more.
Her eyes moved off the table, slowly wondering about the room. They locked on a couple dancing close together. It was her frist and only true love dancing there with a girl that he loved more than ever. She could feel the pain in her heart to see that. Why, she didn't know. She did not care to be with him anymore, but a little piece of him and the love they had shared remained in her heart.
She pushed away the pain and whiped the few tears from her eyes. There was another young man there; one she recognized very well. He was standing by a table with a girl that she didn't know. They were flirting with happy smiles on their faces. He was her everything, and her feelings towards him hadn't changed much.
Their friendship they had was strong. She loved him greatly as a friend; maybe more than she had ever loved a friend. He told her they'd be friends forever. That her friendship meant too much to him, and he'd never want to lose her. She believed him, but life took it's course, and they went their seperate ways. They kept in touch a little every month or so. Their friendship grew further and further apart, and before she knew it, they did not speak to or see
each other anymore.
Again, she felt the pain in her heart. Perhaps she did at one time love him as much as she had loved her first true love. Tears ran down her cheecks and chin and onto the floor. She pushed away the pain and whiped the tears away yet once more. Of course, she wished that she could go talk to him; smile at him. But he looked too happy. She wanted him to have fun and be happy, eventhough she wasn't. And seeing her would probably make him less happy, so she
thought it best that she stay away.
Voices could be heard from outside. Hearing laughs, she turned to see who they were. They were drinking and smoking. This small group out there reminded her of her past. How she used to be a "bad girl." She somewhat wanted to go over there. Get drunk and forget everything. But no, she thought it best to stay away from them and
their happiness too.
Her mind was full now. Full of past memories and thoughts of the future. She saw their futures, filled with happiness. Her own furture though; all that she could see was darkness. An empty black hole maybe.
There was a gun she had. Hidden well in a pocket she made on her dress. She was jealous of all those happy people, and also mad because, to her, friendship was supposed to be forever. She saw
enough of her friends. She couldn't bare to look at anymore friends from her past.
Finally, they all knew she was there. After hearing her scream "I hate you all." She kept pointing the gun at different people. Wondering which one deserved it the most. She hated herself for ending up like this. Slowly, the gun began to point inward instead of outward towards others. She wondered how she could love all of them so much and yet them. The gun was now pointed to the side of her own head. None of them stopped her or said anything. Hurting, she pulled the trigger. Ending what was left of the "life" she had. |