In a future time, when cockroaches
rule the earth, you just know that
greasy chicken will be the national dish.
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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a
woodchuck got his friggin' head blown off
for screwing up my landscaped property?
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People say to me, "Sam, you're such
a wonderful person. Why are you single?"
How the hell do I know? Why don't you
ask the people who aren't dating me?!?
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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a
hollow-point .38 slug could take out my entire liver.
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If you love something, let it go.
If it comes back, great. If not,
it's probably having dinner with
someone more attractive than you.
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