Learn the History of the Creator - "The Boys a Devil" "No, He's Just Different..." - Comedy & Humor

Greetings, I will now tell you my life story. You might want to go get a snack or something, cause this might take a while. I live in a tiny place that, chances are, you have never heard of, seen, or knew about. It's called Dover, Delaware. Population is something in the lower thousands. I was born here, raised here, but theres no way in hell I'm gonna die here. I'm still less then old enough to get out of this Amish infested wasteland, but my time will come. They say "Patience is a Virtue", but many others say "That Boy is a Devil", of course my mother defends me "No, He's Just Different, Thats all." At the present I am going to (suprise, suprise) Catholic school. It is called Holy Cross and I shun its name. I've spent my whole career as a student here and am grateful that I will only be hear for the remainder of this year, after which I plan on bringing it its demise. Most likely with some sort of explosion.

I went to the olympic games as a waterboy. That was the closest to athletics that I have ever achieved. Boy, were those athletes thirsty. They kept telling me to stop pissing in the water, that it was unhealthy or something, but I wouldn't listen to them. I don't know why, but there's something about comtaminating olympic water with my urine that makes me tingle inside. Eventually I myself got thirsty, forgot about my doings, and was in the hospital for a week. I soon died of kidney failure disfunction syndrom, a rare and exotic disease that affects the brain. Why it's called kidny disfunction is beyond me. Anyway I returned to this world as a butterfly with super intelligence, but that was short-lived because of a damn flyswatter. About a week later I came back as a bowl of petunias that was 20,000 miles in the sky of a strange planet called Margrathea. How I got 20,000 miles in the sky is way beyond me, and a few minutes later, I was a dead bowl of petunias that was smashed beyond recognition.
Soon, I came back yet again as a crazy, drunk, Mexican from the Philippines. Why I am a Mexican from the Phillippines is beyond me. Now, I'm stuck in Delaware. How I, a Mexican Filipino, got stuck in Delaware is also beyond me. Now I just sit in front of the computer and play games, and stuff. Blah Blah Blah...

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