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| Blonde Jokes |
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| Please note that I am a blonde, but still these are funny! |
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| A letter to the supervisor from a blonde Y2K Engineer: Dear Sir, I hope I haven't misunderstood your instructions. Because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem makes any sense to me. At any rate, I have finished converting the months on all the company calendars so that the year 2000 is ready to go with the following new months: Januark Februark Mak Julk ****************************** A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "PULL OVER!" "No," the blonde yelled back, "It's a SCARF!" ****************************** A blonde and a brunette are walking along in a park. The brunette says suddenly, "Awwww, look at the dead birdie." The blonde stops, looks up, and says, "Where?" ****************************** A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain. "What seems to be the problem?" asked to doctor. "You have to help me, I hurt all over," said the woman. "What do you mean, all over?" asked to doctor. "Be a little more specific." The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled, "Oww! that hurts!" Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That hurts, too!" Then she touched her right earlobe; "Oww! Even THAT hurts," she cried. The doctor looked at her thoughtfully for a moment and asked, "Are you a natural blonde?" "Why, yes," she said. "I thought so," said the doctor. "You have a broken finger." ****************************** A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but she was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated shouts out, "Dang!! This one isn't wearing shoes either!" ****************************** Did you hear about the blonde man who won the gold medal in the Olympics? He had it bronzed. ****************************** If you have anymore GOOD blonde jokes, e-mail me and let me know! I would love to post them. |
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