More Jokes About Men :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD - Personal - http://maxpages.com/justsum1/More_Jokes_About

Top 10 Reasons why it sux to be a dick
10. You've got a hole in your head.

9. Your master strangles you all the time.

8. Your head is disproportionate to the rest of your body.

7. You shrink in cold water.

6. You never get a haircut.

5. You always hang around with 2 nuts.

4. Your closest neighbor is an asshole.

3. Your best friend is a pussy.

2. Your scalp gets cut off if you're Jewish.

And the number one reason why it sucks to be a dick:

1. Everytime you get excited, you throw up.

Top 10 Reasons Computers Must Be Male
10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.

9. A better model is always just around the corner.

8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.

7. It is always necessary to have a backup.

6. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.

5. The best part of having one is the games you can play.

4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

3. The lights are on but nobody's home.

2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.

1. Size does matter.

1. What can a bird do that a man can't?
Whistle through his pecker.

2. Why did the man cross the road?
Because he heard the chicken was a slut.

3. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time!

4. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
Because they won't stop to ask for directions.

5. Why don't women have men's brains?
Because they don't have a penis to keep them in!

6. What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
They're usually intended for children, but it's the men who end up
playing with them.

7. Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
Because their balls fall over their asshole and they vapor-lock!

8. Why do men masturbate?
It's sex with someone they love.

9. Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.

10. Why did God create a man before a women?
You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.

11. Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?
So he can tell if he's coming or going.

12. Have you heard of the Lorena Bobbit computer virus?
It turns your hard drive into a three and a half inch floppy.

Email Vs Penis

1. Some folks have it, some don't.

2. Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off.

3. Those who have it think that those who don't are somehow inferior.

4. Those who don't have it may agree that it's neat, but think it's
not worth the fuss that those who have it make about it.

5. Many of those who don't have it would like to try it. (e-mail envy)

6. It can be up or down. It's more fun when it's up, but this makes it
hard to get any real work done.

7. In the long distant past, its only purpose was to transmit
information vital to the survival of the species. Some people still
think that's the only thing it should be used for, but most folks
today use it for fun most of the time.

8. If you don't apply the appropriate measures, it can spread viruses.

9. If you use it too much, you'll find it becomes more and more
difficult to think coherently.

10. We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual
size and influence warrant.

11. If you're not careful what you do with it, it can get you into a
lot of trouble.

ICQ ME 24345339

just_sum_one@hotmail.com

Visitors: 10430

Page Updated Wed Sep 15, 1999 3:37am EDT