Yo mamma jokes 3 - Jokes - http://maxpages.com/jokeforyou/Yo_mamma_jokes

Yo mama's so fat...

Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good
side.

Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.

Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help.

Yo mama' so fat, she's 36-24-36... but thats her forearm, neck, and thigh!

Yo mama's so fat, they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the
other side to get her through.

Yo mama's so fat, she can lay down and stand up and her height doesn't
change.

Yo mama's so fat, when she dances, she makes the band skip.

Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Polo shirt is real.

Yo mama's so fat, when she works at the movie theater, she works as the
screen.

Yo mama's so fat, when she runs she makes the CD player skip... at the radio
station.

Yo mama's so fat, her belly jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion machine.

Yo mama's so fat, all the restaurants in town have signs that say:

"Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama"

Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four

sides of the milk carton.

Yo mama's so fat, instead of Levis 501 jeans, she wears Levi's 1002's.

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.

Yo mama's so fat, all of her clothes have to be custom made by a contractor.

Yo mama's so fat, when I said I wanted "Pigs in a blanket" she got

back in bed.

Yo mama's so fat, when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the

doctor gave her 5 years to live.

Yo mama's so fat, she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.

Yo mama's so fat, she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.

Yo mama's so fat, a picture of her fell off the wall!

Yo mama's so fat, her picture takes two frames.

Yo mama's so fat, when I yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through the
wall.

Yo mama's so fat, she could sell shade.

Yo mama's so fat, her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.

Yo mama's so fat, when she crosses the street, cars look out for her.

Yo mama's so fat, she puts mayonaise on aspirin.

Yo mama's so fat, people jog around her for exercise.

Yo mama's so fat, I ran around her twice and got lost.

Yo mama's so fat, she gets runs in her jeans.

Yo mama's so fat, when she was walking in her jeans I swear I smelled

something burning.

Yo mama's so fat, I gotta take three steps back just to see all of her.

Yo mama's so fat, her ass has it's own congressman.

Yo mama's so fat, she shops for clothes in the local tent shop.

Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on a train track, the warning

lights went on.

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks

"Where can I try that on?"

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she takes up all the rings.

Yo mama's so fat and old that when God said "Let there be Light", he told

her to move her fat ass out of the way.

Yo mama's so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.

Yo mama's so fat, the animals at the zoo feed her.

Yo mama's so fat, when your father mounts her, his ears pop.

Yo mama's so fat, "Place Your Ad Here" is printed on each of her butt cheeks.

Yo mama's so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.

Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she plays the interior line.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears heels, they're flats by the afternoon.

Yo mama's so fat, when she leaves the beach everybody shouts

"The coast is clear."

Yo mama's so fat, she wakes up in sections.

Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.

Yo mama's so fat, her college graduation picture was an aerial.

Yo mama's so fat, her yearbook picture is an aerial.

Yo mama's so fat, her driver's license says

"Picture continued on other side."

Yo mama's so fat, they used her for a trampoline at the Olympics.

Yo mama's so fat, she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon.

Yo mama's so fat, when she put on some BVD's by the time they

reached her waist they spelled "BouleVarD."

Yo mama's so fat, when she auditioned for a part in "Indiana Jones,"

she got the part as the big rolling ball.

Yo mama's so fat, she goes to a restaurant, looks at the

menu, and says "Okay."

Yo mama's so fat, when she brought her dress to the cleaners, they said "Sorry,
we don't do curtains."

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she
gets an estimate.

Yo mama's so fat, when I finished having sex with her and tried to roll off, I
was still on her.

Yo mama's so fat, if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for
it!

Yo mama's so fat, she's got Amtrak tattooed on her leg.

Yo mama's so fat, when the police showed her a picture of her feet, she
couldn't identify them.

Yo mama's so fat, we got her in the drive-in free by dressing her as a Chevy.

Yo mama's so fat, she went on a light diet... As soon as it's light she starts
eating.

Yo mama's so fat, she went on a seafood diet... Whenever she saw food she ate
it.

Yo mama's so fat, she could go a week without eating and still not lose weight.

Yo mama's so fat, when she bends over we go into daylight savings time.

Yo mama's so fat, she's half Indian, half Irish, and half American.

Yo mama's so fat, when I climbed up on top of her, I burned my ass on the
lightbulb.

Yo mama's so fat, if she wears fishnet stockings, they'd better be 50 pound test!

Yo mama's so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.

Yo mama's so fat, she has her own area code.

Yo mama's so fat, her ass looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.

Yo mama's so fat, when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back
party.

Yo mama's so fat, when I was done I rolled over, over again, and I was still on
top of the bitch.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.

Yo mama's so fat, if she weighed five more pounds, she could get group
insurance!

Yo mama's so fat, she went to Sizzler and got a group discount.

Yo mama's so fat, she made weight watchers go blind.

Yo mama's so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each timezone.

Yo mama's so fat n black, she jumped in the ocean and they thought she was an
oil spill.

Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she play offense and defense.

Yo mama's so fat, her nickname is "Damn."

Yo mama's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot-dogs.

Yo mama's so fat, your daddy had to roll her in flower and look for the wet
spot.

Yo mama's so fat, she broke her leg and gravy dripped out.

Yo mama's so fat, she DJ's for the ice cream truck.

Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her to "Get the fuck
off."

Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it said "Please step out of
the car."

Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and she saw her phone number.

Yo mama's so fat, the last time she saw 90210 she was on a scale.

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued."

Yo mama's so fat, when she steps on a scale, it says "One at a time, please."

Yo mama' so fat, she's moving the Earth out of its orbit.

Yo mama's so fat, no one can talk behind her back.

Yo mama's so fat, I gain weight just by watching her eat.

Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.

Yo mama's so fat, she's got her own zip code.

Yo mama's so fat, she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her as a new
world.

Yo mama's so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't reach her back pocket.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway.

Yo mama's so fat, when she comes down the stairs she measures on the Richter
scale.

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she even orders "Thank You,
Come Again."

Yo mama's so fat, she eats biscuits like tic tacs.

Yo mama's so fat, she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama's so fat, when yo father fell in love with her he got lost.

Yo mama's so fat, when she swims, she leaves stretch marks on the swimming
pool.

Yo mama's so fat, she leaves stretch marks on the bathtub.

Yo mama's so fat, when she fills up the tub, she fills up the tub.

Yo mama's so fat, she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and
oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!

Yo mama's so fat, she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"

Yo mama's so fat, she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.

Yo mama's so fat, she has more nooks and crannies than a Thomas' English
Muffin.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to buy two airline tickets.

Yo mama's so fat, she eats pumpkin pies like Skittles.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to grease her hands to get into her pockets.

Yo mama's so fat, she has two stomachs: One for meat, one for vegetables.

Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her ass weighs 50 pounds.

Yo mama's so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Yo mama's so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.

Yo mama's so fat, she measures 36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big.

Yo mama's so fat, NASA orbits satellites around her.

Yo mama's so fat, NASA is going to use her to fill the hole in the ozone layer.

Yo mama's so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Seattle, NY.

Yo mama's so fat, I saw her in New York, and when I told my friend in LA,
he'd seen her too.

Yo mama's so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

Yo mama's so fat, she looks like the Stay-Puff marshmallow man on steroids.

Yo mama's so fat, she sat on the corner and the police came & said "Break it
up!"

Yo mama's so fat, she sat on a dollar and made change.

Yo mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change gears.

Yo mama's so fat, she shows up on radar.

Yo mama's so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.

Yo mama's so fat, she tried to get an all-over tan, and the sun burned out.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses hula hoops to hold up her socks.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses a mattress for a maxi-pad.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses a pillow case as a sock.

Yo mama's so fat, her skates went flat.

Yo mama's so fat, her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.

Yo mama's so fat, she wears a VCR for a beeper.

Yo mama's so fat, she went to a Chinese Restaurant and ordered a 40oz. of
gravy.

Yo mama's so fat, she has 48 midnight snacks.

Yo mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't tie her own shoes.

Yo mama's so fat, she eats cereal out of a satellite dish.

Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Jordache is real.

Yo mama's so fat, she sat in Big Foot and made it a lowrider.

Yo mama's so fat, when she got on the bus she turned it into a low rider.

Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.

Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street everyone yells
"Earthquake!"

Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street, you can hear her hips
saying to each other "If you let me by, I'll let you pass."

Yo mama's so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of
your show.

Yo mama's so fat, when she volunteered to clean cages at the zoo, people
walked by and said "Look at the elephant!"

Yo mama's so fat, the highway patrol made her wear a "Caution! Wide Turn"
sign.

Yo mama's so fat, she sat on an Oreo and unlocked the magic.

Yo mama's so fat, they had to baptize her at Sea World.

Yo mama's so fat, she jumed in da ocean and the whales started singing "We
are family!"

Yo mama's so fat, when I have sex with her I have to slap her ass and ride the
wave in.

Yo mama's so fat, they changed my Physics book to say "What goes up must
come down, except Yo mama."

Yo mama's so fat, they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.

Yo mama's so fat, she bungee jumped and went straight to hell.

Yo mama's so fat, when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses blanket as a washcloth.

Yo mama's so fat, when her beeper went off, people thought she was backing
up.

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy, Free
Willy."

Yo mama's so fat, when she backs up she beeps.

Yo mama's so fat, she plays pool with the planets.

Yo mama's so fat, she's taller lying down.

Yo mama's so fat, the only thing she can fit into at the clothing store is the
dressing rooms.

Yo mama's so fat, when she fell down the stairs, she rocked herself asleep
trying to get up again.

Yo mama's so fat, they had to install speed bumps at the all-u-can-eat buffet.

Yo mama's so fat, she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet.

Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the
house.

Yo mama's so fat, you can pinch an inch on her forehead.

Yo mama's so fat, you could go swimming in her bra.

Yo mama's so fat, when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo mama's so fat, on a scale of 1 to 10, she's a 747.

Yo mama's so fat, she has a greater gravitational attraction than a black hole.

Yo mama's so fat, she uses the carpet as a blanket.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears corduroy pants, the ridges don't show.

Yo mama's so fat, she made Richard Simmons cry.

Yo mama's so fat, even Richard Simmons laughs at her.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a red dress people yell "Hey Kool-Aid Man.

"Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people call her "Taxi!"

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, kids think its the school
bus.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a purple sweater people call her "Barney."

Yo mama is so fat, when she sits in a chair, the rolls on her legs, cover her feet
like a blanket.

Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her ass
back in the water.

Yo mama's so fat, when she went to get a water bed, they put a blanket across
Lake Michigan.

Yo mama's so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, Skittle's fell out.

Yo mama's so fat, and you're so poor, when she comes in your house the tires
pop.

Yo mama's so fat, she don't know wether she's walking or rolling.

Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to fuck her I didn't know if I was hitting the
hole or a roll.

Yo mama's so fat, when my dog went to fuck her he had to peel too many fat
rolls and said "Fuck It."

Yo mama's so fat, when she fart the whole planet came out.

Yo mama's so fat, she makes sumo wrestlers look anerexic.

Yo mama's so fat, her car is made of spandex.

Yo mama's so fat, we're inside her right now.

Yo mama's so fat, she makes Big Bird look like a rubber duck.

Yo mama's so fat, one day when she got in a fight the person fighting her got
lost in her.

Yo mama's so fat, when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it
was American Airlines biggest jet.

Yo mama's so fat, if she were an airplane, she'd be a jumbo jet.

Yo mama's so fat, one day she was lifting up her rolls and a car fell out.

Yo mama's so fat, Dr. Martens had to kill 3 cows just to make her a pair of
shoes.

Yo mama's so fat, when the bitch goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to
install speed bumps.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't stay on a basketball court for three seconds without
getting called for a key violation.

Yo mama so fat that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step.

Yo mama's so fat, all the chairs in her house have seatbelts.

Yo mama's so fat, she smells like bacon at 90 degrees.

Yo mama's so fat, and her back is so crooked, when she lays down...people say
"I didn't know we had mountains."

Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips.

Yo mama's so fat, they call her "Big Fat Ho."

Yo mama's so fat, when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.

Yo mama's so big...

Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.

Yo mama's so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she was
walking or rolling.

Yo mama's so big, she rollerskates on busses.

Yo mama's so big, she can't wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on
her back.

Yo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.

Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.

Yo mama's so big, she whistles bass.

Yo mama's so big, she uses bowling balls for earrings.

Yo mama's so big, that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits
most"

Yo mama's so big, when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they
stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway.

Yo mama's so big, when I fingered her I lost a watch and two rings!

Yo mama's so big, when she goes in the water at the beach she changes the
tide.

Yo mama's so big, when she stands up the sun goes out.

Yo mama's so stupid

Yo mama's so stupid...Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin'
at an orange juice box because it said `concentrate.'

Yo mama's so stupid, I put a Scratch-N'-Sniff sticker on the bottom of the pool
and she drowned.

Yo mama's so stupid, she has 1 toe & bought a pair of flip flops

Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to
makeup her mind.

Yo mama's so stupid, she put a phone up her ass and thought she was making a
booty call.

Yo mama's so stupid, she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.

Yo mama's so stupid, she put on her glasses to watch 20/20.

Yo mama's so stupid, she got stabbed in a shoot-out.

Yo mama's so stupid, she failed a survey.

Yo mama's so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go.

Yo mama's so stupid, she gave birth to you.

Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping out of the
basement window.

Yo mama's so stupid, she needs twice as much sense to be a half-wit.

Yo mama's so stupid, she told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and
"Don't Walk.

"Yo mama's so stupid, when the computer said "Press any key to continue", she
couldn't find the 'Any' key.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought 2pac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.

Yo mama's so stupid, when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said
"Cherry or grape?

"Yo mama's so stupid, she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a
branch manager.

Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her to squeal like a pig, she said "Moo!"

Yo mama's so stupid, her latest invention was a glass hammer.

Yo mama's so stupid, she saw a billboard that said "Dodge Trucks" and she
started ducking through traffic.

Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked out of a convertible car with the top
down.

Yo mama's so stupid, when she threw a grenade at me I pulled the pin and
threw it

back.

Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner with a sign that said "Will eat for
food.

"Yo mama's so stupid, she got on an elevator and thought it was a mobile
home.

Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in Furniture World and slept on the floor.

Yo mama's so stupid, she got shoved in an oven and froze to death.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer.

Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in a meat locker and sweat to death.

Yo mama's so stupid, when your dad fucked her she said "Doesn't it go in my
mouth?

"Yo mama's so stupid, she leaves the house for the Home Shopping Network.

Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to put M&M's in order.

Yo mama's so stupid, she peals M&M's to make chocolate chip cookies.

Yo mama's so stupid, her breasts are square because she forgot to take the
Kleenex out of the box.

Yo mama's so stupid, she sat on the TV & watched the couch.

Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what
colors they had.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought St. Ides was a Catholic church.

Yo mama's so stupid,

she thinks sexual battery is something in a dildo.Yo mama's so stupid,

the first time she used a vibrator, she cracked her two front teeth.

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Page Updated Sun Jul 10, 2005 8:44am EDT