The MST for Chapter One of Dark Crystals P3 - Anime - http://maxpages.com/johnsficpage/chp_one_of_Dark_Crystals

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Setzer> Ahh. Mina's Snores.
Edgar> No that's an "Enthusiastic Shout".
-"Konnichiwa, Ami-chan," Makoto and Usagi greeted cheerfully as they sat down next to Mizuno Ami, whom was eating a sandwich and reading a book titled "Spiritual Physics Studies."
Edgar> o_O. I can't even spell it.
-"Oh, konnichiwa," Ami said, looking up and setting the book down after finishing one portion of her sandwich. Usagi did the classic anime sigh, complete with the huge sweat drop hanging over her head while she did so.
-"Aims, don't you ever get tired of studying? I know I would, especially studying half the school day!" Usagi said, making her point clear and known.
Setzer> ::imitating Ami:: Studying? No. I LIKE this book.
-"Oh, of course not. I find something new and interesting in each book. This would be the..........234th book I've checked out of the library. I think. About............1, 437 more to go to complete them all, not counting the children's books I read when I was a little girl. You should try it, Usagi. You might even improve your grades," Ami explained, a smile on her face. Makoto facevaulted.
Edgar> ::imitating Ami:: I'm going for the world record!
-"The 234th book?!" She asked in disbelief. Ami nodded.
Setzer> ::imitating Ami:: While it is true that most of them were porn, i still read that many!
-"Mm-hmm. But on weekends I do read some books to the gifted programs of the elementary schools, so that quickly adds to the total," she added. Usagi just blinked in shock.
Edgar> ::imitating Usagi trying to read "The Little Engine that Could":: I . th...th..think. i..I..I'm Hungry.
-'How could someone read all that and still not get some kind of eye infection or something?' Usagi wondered. Looking up, she saw a familiar face.
Terra> better question. How can someone eat as much as Usagi and never gain wieght?
-"Oh! Konnichiwa, Naru-chan!" She called, waving to the redheaded girl heading their way.
"Konnichiwa, Usagi! Konnichiwa, Makoto, Ami! Can I join yah for lunch?" Naru asked.
"Sure!" Makoto replied.
"Oh, Makoto-chan, I........sorta........ate my lunch during class. Could I have some of yours? Pleeeeease?" Usagi pressed, forcing a big smile on her face to look as kawaii as possible. Makoto laughed good-naturedly.
Edgar, setzer and Terra> ::imitating Makato:: No.
-"Hai, hai. You can have some, Usagi. I'm full, anyway," Makoto said, handing the rest of her lunch over to Usagi. Shiitake mushrooms, cookies, cakes, shrimp, squid, ramen noodles, curry, and a few fancy looking sandwiches.
Edgar> ::imitating Usagi:: This is all you have? well i suppose it'll have to do for a appitizer.
-"Arigato, Makoto!" Usagi said, grabbing some chopsticks from out of nowhere and going into full-alert vacuum mode, complete with vacuuming sound effects, guzzling the food until not a crumb remained.
Setzer> ::imitating Usagi with a deep voice:: FEED ME!
-The other three girls facevaulted, their eyes occasionally twitching. (Just envision any anime character doing said facevault with kawaii anime eyetwitch)
Setzer> ::imitating Makato:: you could lose a arm in there.......
-"Kuso, Usagi!" Naru said, covering her mouth as soon as she realized what she had let slip out. "Oops.....I didn't say nothin'!" she lied, hoping no one else around them heard her cursing.
Edgar> you know. i often wondered how someone had a long island accent in tokyo.
Setzer> ::imitating Minako:: ask me no questions i'll give you no flies.
-"You just keep telling yourself that Naru. Maybe we'll believe it," Usagi laughed. Before Usagi could say anymore, a few buses pulled to a stop in front of the school.
Setzer> one for Usagi. and one for the others.
-"Oh, I forgot! Today's the field trip to.........to......."
Edgar> hell? no wait, they wouldn't want to visit this satelite.
Setzer> Buses suck. They should have used a airship.
Terra> They don't HAVE any over there setzer.
Setzer> oh.
-Usagi snapped her fingers as she tried to remember. "Oh yeah! We're going out into the country to see a farm, right?"
Setzer> what is the educational reason for going to see a farm?
Edgar> to see pigs and sheep and stuff like that.
Terra> ::thinks. i am stuck with two pigs::
-"Should be fun," Makoto said, sarcasm dripping from her voice like honey from a honeycomb.
"Yep. A fahmah and his doity (dirty) hoes," Naru sighed, causing Usagi and Makoto to laugh hysterically. "What?"
Edgar and setzer> ::fall over laughing::
Terra> Bakas.....
-"Na-[gasp]-Naru, think real hard about what you just said! Heheheheh!" Usagi said between gasps and giggles.
"A.......fahmah..........and.......his doity.......hoes..........!" Naru realized what she had said and cracked up as well. Ami sighed, finished up her sandwich, and continued reading chapter 87 of "Spiritual Physics Studies."
Setzer> Damn she's quick!
-"ATTENTION STUDENTS!" A voice blasted over the intercom, causing everyone to jump, scream, or choke on a ho-ho. "-Ahem!- Thank you. We will be boarding the buses for the field trip to the countryside. Please board the buses in an orderly fashion, and mind the students from the other schools." The students filed onto the buses. Usagi found a seat near the others, and sat down. Makoto and Ami followed.
Edgar> dontcha just love those old fashioned PA systems?
-"Konnichiwa, Usagi, Ami, Makoto," Rei and Minako replied. Minako untied her ribbon and tied it back to form a variation of a fancy ponytail. She then straightened her light orange halter top and her short white denim skirt, causing half the male population of students from Juuban High School to stare and drool.
Edgar and Setzer> ::drool::
-The half not including Umino, who was desperately trying to get a date with Naru, asking again every time he got turned down. Usagi then noticed a bee creeping along her arm, screamed, and smashed it. The buses then started, and Ami buried her nose in the last chapter of Spiritual Physics Studies, chapter 294.
Edgar> O_o.

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Setzer> so Mina fell asleep along the way.
-"A farm, eh? Should be fun. And..........the farmer...........seems to be a good victim.....hey, bro!" Mikowa called to her brother. Shinikio appeared.
"Nani? Mikowa, I was just on a date with Rishoni. Why have you summoned me?"
"Never mind that, brother. You'll find out."
Edgar> ::imitating Mikowa:: Just wanted to argivate you.

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Setzer> Mina snores alot......
-"Nakitaku naru you-na moonlight...Denwa mo dekinai midnight..." Rei and Makoto sang, soon after causing everyone to join in.
Terra> ::imitating Usagi singing:: ThE WhEeLs On ThE bUs Go RoUnD aNd RoUnD!
Setzer> sounds like a cat humping a blender on puriee mode.....
- Including Usagi. After that ordeal, Usagi's singing made everyone else stop, hoping to encourage her to stop as well. (That and I forgot the rest of it in Japanese. So sue me. ^V^)
"Why'd everyone stop?" Usagi wondered.
Edgar> ::imitating Rei:: Becuase your voice sounds like something went down your throat and stayed there.
-"Gomen ne, Usagi-chan. But we got tired of singing. We.......wanna save it for the farmer, so he can hear how real singing sounds, instead of country music," Makoto lied, hoping Usagi would buy it. She did.
Setzer> ::imitating Usagi:: I STILL don't understand why i have to pay for a record of my own song!
-"Oh. Well, then, okay!" Usagi looked silently out the window, the sun-dappled roads shaded with leaves becoming her feelings, bright and cheery, but shaded in darkness. 'I just hope Mamoru is okay on his trip....'

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Setzer> THAT has to be anoying sound......
-"Okay......here ya go, piggies.......hold on, Kakitia-chan. I'll feed you too," Mr. Nichiwa laughed, dumping shiitake mushrooms into the trough that served as a pig's buffet/food bar, then going over to the large brown, white, and black-spotted Holstein. "Here ya go!" He then dumped seaweed into the cow's food pail. A breeze rolled by, an odd presence in the wind. He turned around.
Setzer> it's the worst evil imagineable......
Edgar> it's the IRS! Run for your life!!
-"Huh? ........Someone there?.........Guess it must've been my imagination...." He then turned back around to finish giving Kakitia her seaweed, when he saw an attractive young woman walk up to him.
Setzer> ::imitating the woman:: I heard you have a few hoes.
Edgar> ::imitating the farmer:: yes. i like to plant my seeds.
-"Excuse me, sir," the woman said in a soft, whispery voice, causing the man to jump.
"Yah!.......Oh, you startled me, Miss…?"
"Oh, gomen! My name is Shinoki, and I got a little lost.......can you point me in the direction of Tokyo?" She asked, trying to form sad puppy eyes on her face.
Setzer> ::imitating the farmer:: It's about 10,000 miles thataway and two continents over.
-"Hai. It's to the South there. If you follow that road over there, you can get there in no time. Need a lift? I can call my chauffeur."
Setzer> farmers have chauffuers? jeez maybe i should have been one instead of a wandering gambler.
"No, I can get there on foot. But before I go, here's my thanks." She pressed a small diamond into his hand.
"A-arigato, but I can't accept such a beautiful gift....."
Edgar> ::imitating the farmer:: i can't accept this. ::steals her purse::
-"I insist." She left, turning around one more time. "Arigato, sir!" Nichiwa gazed at the diamond in his hand, then felt his body go numb and his eyes glaze over as the diamond imbedded itself into his palm. The strange feeling quickly faded, and he began humming as he went back to work.
Setzer> ::imitating the farmer:: Dammit! i lose more precious jewelry that way!

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Setzer> ::snoring:: ************************************
Edgar and Terra> i guess you CAN make a sound like that......
-"We're here. Now, everyone, please leave the bus in a single fi-" The principal didn't have time to finish his speech as wave after wave of students knocked him over, rushing off the bus.
Setzer> ::imitating a student:: i can't wait to see Piles of Manure and foul smelling Farmers! yay! life is good!
-"Can we just get this over with as soon as possible?"
"This place smells."
"Did someone rip one?"
"That's that huge pile of manure over there that you're smelling."
"Ugh!"
"Did it just move?"
Setzer> ::imitating the pile of Manure:: No i didn't move.
Edgar> ::imitating a student:: oh. Thanks for clearing that up for me.
Setzer> ::imitating the pile of Manure: No problem kid.
-"Reminds me of my math teacher....." Students clamored until the principal grabbed a huge microphone from a hook on the bus's wall and turned it on.
Setzer> Ahh... talking dirty to a microphone.
-"AHEM! Attention!" The students all jumped, Umino accidentally tripping into the giant pile of animal shit. As the principal went over the rules about throwing rocks at passing cars, Rei whispered to the other 4 girls, "Geez! T*A Private Girl's School is more interesting than this guy, and our teacher is an old bat with bad gas to boot!"
Setzer> ::imitating Umino Covered in Animal Shit:: Hey Usagi! how's about that kiss?
Terra> ::imitating Usagi:: sure. why not?
-"UMINO is more interesting than this!" Usagi whispered. Ami and Makoto nodded their heads in agreement. Umino was now screaming and thrashing in the big pile of crap. Minako let her gaze wander when she saw a boy that caught her eye...
Terra> hmm.... The boy screaming as he flips around in crap, or A cute guy? Tough choice...
-"AH! My Goddess!" She whispered.
"That's Megami-sama, baka!" Rei whispered back.
"Whatever. Isn't he kawaii?" Minako said, pointing at a young boy that seemed to be from Juuban High School, judging by his uniform. "Usagi-chan! Are you listening? Look at him, I mean he is THE most kawaii thing!" Minako said, grabbing one of Usagi's odangos and turning her head towards the boy. "Look!"
Setzer> ::imitating Usagi:: Don't touch my meatballs Minako.
-"Oww! Minako-chan, let go! Hmm........who's he? I never saw him before.......and I know almost everyone at Juuban," Usagi said thoughtfully, finally getting free from the iron grip of Minako.
Edgar> ::Imitating Minako whining:: But i wanna Hold your balls!!
-
"Is he a transfer? No........wait. Haruna-senseii never said anything about a new transfer, and she usually lets everyone know about a transfer even if they're in another class..Or, for that matter, another school....." The boy had straight brown hair with blonde streaks in it, and piercing green eyes.
"Cat eyes…?" Usagi thought.
Setzer> ::imitating Usagi, as Kasumi:: Oh my. i think I'm stoned again. Minako dear please get the needle and heroin
-"Hey, Shinikio," Naru said, waving and smiling cheerfully. The boy, now confirmed as Shinikio, smiled and waved back.
Terra> Nothings worse than people with unconfirmed names..
-The principal's voice droned on as he read the other 5,832 rules off his mile-long list
Setzer> ::imitating the principal as Ben Stein:: no throwing cow poo at others. no spanking the monkey. no voting on the second tuesday of every month. no sleeping with my wife.
Edgar> STOP! we're falling asleep here!!
-"Usagi, can you tell you-
Edgar> ::imitating Usagi:: sure i do that all the time.
--wait. 'Can you tell YOU?
Setzer> Imitating Usagi:; I already said yes!
-' Where'd THAT come from?
Setzer> knowing minako. We may never know the answer.
- Never mind. Usagi, can you tell HIM, that Shinekio guy, that I would like to talk to him?"
Terra> ::imitating Usagi:: no.
-"Hai. At your service, Miss Aino Minako!" Usagi said, adding to the mock soldier act with a salute that only her and the other senshi knew as her finishing pose
Setzer> So she fell down and started crying?
-, that is, when she was done transforming. Of course, one of the reasons that she never let anyone else know her identity, especially boys, was that she knew that when they saw her transform, they would get an eyeful. And the last thing she needed was some half-wit gawking at her with a camera in hand, flash bulb and shutter clicking and whirring.
Edgar> ...... dammit! they ruin all of my plans! ::tosses camera into the trash::
-
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Setzer> Hmm..... jokes on this are getting old.
-Hmm.........kawaii girl..........can't let her see me staring at her large, round, firm.........
Setzer> Meatballs?
Edgar> ::imitating Usagi:: He's starting at my HAIR!!! Kill him Mamoru!
-legs. That's it. Get ahold of yourself, you ecchi baka hentai!' Shinekio thought, drooling over Minako's form.
Setzer and Edgar> ::drools over minakos form::
-over Minako's form. Of course, he stopped himself just in time. 'If Rishoni saw me drooling over this girl, she'd hand my ass to me on a platter. Well-done, probably."
Edgar> Hmm... So she'd feed him some Shitake?

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*Click! Whirrrrrr............*
Setzer> *pop. pop. Fizz. Fizz*
All> What a relife it is!
-"UMINO, NO HENTAI!" Usagi screeched, cutting off the principal's speech about cow-tipping and how to avoid doing so. Seconds later, Gurio Umino was airborne,
Setzer> ::imitating rose off of Titanic:: I'm flying!
- and heading for a cruise liner somewhere in the Southeastern Pacific. She then wrapped her skirt a bit tighter, just in case any other hentais tried to get some panty shots. And if they did, they would suffer the same fate Umino had.....
Edgar> ::imitating Umino:: NOOOO!! i'm doomed to live on a high class cruise ship forever!
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"AAAAAAAAAAH!" Umino yelled, hitting and making a hole in the deck of a boat called the S.S. Anne.
All> ::blink. Blink. Blink:: o_O
-"Ash! Watch out!"
Edgar> ::imitating The captain:: Unidentified flying geek at six o-clock!
-"Ow, my back...."
"Brock, get a chiropractor." No time, as the ship quickly sank, with the passengers,
Setzer> ::imitating Stewardess:: in case of emergency Use your cabinmate as a floatation device.
-minus one, sank and exploded.
Terra> Umino. Things that make cruise ships go BOOM.
-
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"-so in order to avoid cow tipping, do not touch the cow with the palm of your hand facing against the cow's skin and do not try to push it over. Now, any questions?" Naru raised her hand.
Terra>::imitating Naru:: what is the meaning of life?
Setzer> ::imitating Naru:: Is murdering a perverted geek legal here?
Edgar> ::imitating Naru:: and .. Just who are you exactly?
-"Yes soir, I have a question! What do we do if a chicken pecks at us?
Setzer> ::imitating the principal:: depending on his size? be flattered.
-"Kill the little bastards. Now, we will enter in a single-"
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" A very charred Umino wailed, landing on the principal. Usagi winced at the sound of bones crunching.
Edgar> now it's time for a bad pun!
Setzer> ::imitating usagi:: jeez. he should be more carefull when he drops by.
-"That's GOTTA hurt."
"I'm not so sure that's supposed to bend like that," Ami said.
Edgar> oh crap!. If she's not sure then what chance do we have?!
-"Wow. How'd he make it go like THAT?" Minako asked. Numerous students cheered and stampeded past the principal.
Terra> ::as the crocidile hunter:: Today. we are tracking down a wild herd of school children.
-"-We'll enter in a single file," the principal squawked out, woozy after so many feet had walked all over him.

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"Konnichiwa, everyone," Nichiwa greeted warmly. His eyes scanned the large crowd gathered on his front lawn. "Gosh, how many of you are there?" He muttered, counting each one. He arrived at the total.......
"Dear God, is that even a number?"
Edgar> ::imitating a narrator:: Todays fic is brought to you by the number A,

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