THE RULES OF PRISON - some helpful tips for the prison yard.....trust me i know from experience - Comedy & Humor - http://maxpages.com/icanfly/rules_of

yes i have saved them

THE RULES OF PRISON:

1:DONT DROP THE SOAP (your naked and bending over.... not good in prison)

2:DON'T WHIZ ON THE ELECTRIC FENCE (cause you'll pass out and wake up with a lot of happy inmates around you and a very sore ass)

3:DON'T USE SHAMPOO (you won't be able to see leaving your ass vonerable)

5:DON'T TRUST THE SUCURITY GAURDS (they are just as horny as the inmates)

6:DON'T WEAR SHOE LACES (do u wanna have to BEND OVER and tie your shoes?)

7:DON'T PASSOUT (ok im giving some obvious advice here)

8:CARRY PLAYBOYS WITH YOU (if you do this will delay your time of rape because they'll be busy entertaining them-selves)

9:DON'T PICK UP ANYTHING FOR ANYONE (if u don't get this one by now, you're a moron)

10:MAKE SOMEONE YOUR BITCH BEFORE THEY MAKE YOU THEIRS

11:TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ALL YOUNGER INMATES

12:CARRY VASOLINE AT ALL TIMES (if you think it hurts to get screwed up the ass with vasoline try it without it and see how it feels)

13:TRY NOT TO BE SHORT (trust me, you don't wanna be at crouch level with an inmate)

14:DO NOT YELL (they'll just consider that foreplay of somne sort)

15:DON'T WEAR A BELT (if you got an s&m freak butt raping you, you don't want him to use the belt as a whip)

16:NEVER PICK UP DROPPED MONEY (they may drop $20 for you to pick up but trust me, it aint worth it)

17:IF YOU HAPPEN TO DROP THE SOAP, MAKE SURE TO LATHER UP GOOD (you dont want friction in your ass when being butt raped)

18:CARRY SOAP ON A ROPE AT ALL TIMES (it will prevent you from dropping the soap)

19:THERE IS NO SAFE WAY TO DROP THE SOAP (trust me i know)

20:SHAVE YOUR ASS (you don't want an inmate angry with you because you forgot to shave your ass and he has ass hairs and scuffle burn on him)

21: IF U HAPPEN TO BE A HERMAPHODITE, CHOOSE THE WOMENS JAIL (ok this ones very obvious)

22: PRISON IS LIKE A MIDDLIE SCHOOL, U HAVE SOME NEW EXPERIENCES, U FIND OUT SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF YOU DIDN'T KNOW, AND YOU GET FUCKED IN THE ASS (yes in middle school you get fucked in the ass by the grades you get and how people treat you, and well it's pretty obvious how you get fucked in the ass in prison)

23: SPIKES IN YOUR HAIR ARE CONCIDERED HANDLE BARS

24: BENDING OVER TO PICK UP A PENNY HEADS UP IS BAD LUCK IN PRISON (well so is bending over in genral)

25: JUST GIVE THE GUY THAT ASKS FOR YOU FRUIT COCKTAIL YOUR FRUIT COCKTAIL(better he say "give me you fruit cock tail" than "bitch, give me your cock-tail, fruit")

26: IF THEY ASK YOU WHAT YOUR IN FOR SAY "HAVING GAY BUTT SEX IN PUBLIC" (as momma always said, can't rape the willing)

27: IF YOUR A TEENAGE BOY ON DEATH ROW, DON'T BOTHER GETTING THE LAST RIGHTS FROM A CATHOLIC PRIEST (do, you realy want to be molested the last day of your life)

28: PIMP OTHER INMATES (better they're ass then yours)

AND REMEMBER..IN THE EVENT THAT YOU GET RAPPED THE GAURD WILL BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO VIDEO TAPE YOUR EXPERIANCE...WHETHER YOU WANT HIM TO OR NOT

Sign Guestbook

View Guestbook

cheeya dog and meyhem inc.
aol screen name- carniboy314
city- "hell" paso	favorite color- clear
email is cheeyadog@wherethefuckaremypants.com
my phone number is (1-915) 832-0867
Fax 1-800-do-i-look-like-i-have-a-fax
myspace= www.myspace.com/cheeyadog

Visitors: 00865

Page Updated Thu Mar 2, 2006 11:37am EST