 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
PSYCHOTIC RAMBLINGS
SLOKKO THE BI POLAR CAT
LINK EM DANO
CELEBRITY PUNCHOUT
WEEKLY MIND PICKER
ESP game
AWARDS
comment
faq
JOKE CENTER
cards
sign up
SWEEPSTAKES PAGE
trivia
cartoon
viki
ryan
about
Dating Horror Stories
|
|
|
PSYCHOTIC RAMBLINGS |
SLOKKO THE BI POLAR CAT |
LINK EM DANO |
CELEBRITY PUNCHOUT |
WEEKLY MIND PICKER |
ESP game | comment | faq | JOKE CENTER | cards | sign up | SWEEPSTAKES PAGE | trivia | cartoon | ryan | about | Dating Horror Stories |
| ||||||
| PSYCHOTIC RAMBLINGS |
| MY CHANCE TO HOWL AT THE MOON |
1/18/00 "My boy is just like me" When you first have a kid people say things like "He has his Mother's red hair" or "He has his Father's eyes." These genetic traits are obvious and you don't think about them too much. It's the other traits you pass along that make you scratch your head. I was watching the football game while seated on the couch and my son was standing next to me. He had his hand down the back of his pants and was reaching into his diaper. He has picked up this habit so I told him to stop. Then I noticed my hand was down halfway down in the front of my pants. I didn't even realize I was doing it. My wife often wonders aloud when she married Al Bundy. I told my wife what he was doin and she said she had talked to him before but he doesn't seem to listen to her. "Huh? Sorry, What was that hon?" Having a child is in many ways like looking into a mirror. Sometimes you look and think "You know, you're one slick lookin dude" and other time you just see that tremendous whitehead on your chin. I wonder what other traits my son will get from me? Will he have a fierce independent streak? Will he be painfully shy in crowds? Will he love music? Will he ask too many questions? Each child has their own personality and how you bring them up will shape their future for sure but those little things you catch yourself doing somehow are passed on. It can be frightening to think about. I mean just think my habit of wearing unmatched socks just may live on for generations. Braisco  9/23/99 A storm by any other name... The recent events dealing with hurricane Floyd and Gert have got me thinking about how we react to stormy weather predictions. In North Carolina the Governor ordered mass evacuations. The reason for the order because without it most people would choose to stay in the path of the storm. Why would normally rational people voluntarily remain in harm's way? I believe it is our system of naming these hurricanes. When you hear the name Floyd what's your first thought? Exactly the barber from the Andy Griffith show. Why would anybody be afraid of good ole' Floyd? What about Gert? Sounds like one of the woman in your Grandmother's bridge club. I can't wait till we get to the S's. Try to get people to pay attention when Hurricane "Skippy" is circling of the coast. Weather forecasters need to take a lesson from Hollywood. Every year Hollywood churns out a bundle of cookie cutter action flicks. People know these movies are horrible but go to see them anyway. Why? It's all in the marketing. The Marketing of these movies starts with the title. Would people listen to hurricane warnings if Hurricane "Sudden Impact" was bearing down on them? Would people living on the coast decide to stay if hurricane "Armageddon" was coming to town? Who's ears wouldn't perk up if they heard this on television? "Now let's go to Chet in the weather office with the latest on "Terminator" which his headed our way." I know what your saying. "What if we use these scary names and the hurricanes fizzle out?" No problem. How many of these movies turn out to be duds and we still pay attention. 7/19/99 Beware of the Corn The following statement may shock you but if you give me a chance it will all make perfect sense. I am very suspicious of corn. I know it's only a vegetable and it's been around forever, but too many things just don't make sense to me. First I would like to know what exactly corn on the cob is. Where did the word "cob" come from? I understand peas in a pod. I can relate to a family of peas all nestled securely nice and cozy. But what other vegetable is on a cob? While I'm on the subject could someone explain the word "niblet." A small pig is a piglet, am I to infer that there is large corn called a nib? It's not just the terminology of corn that scares me, it's also how it can be served. Have you ever seen cream style corn? Basically it is corn soup. We have pea soup. Why must corn try to hide it's true identity? Does corn look down on other vegetables that are mere bases for soup? I can understand the process of how we get corn oil but how the hell do we produce syrup from corn? I have never seen potato syrup. What sort of chemicals does a vegetable have to have to yield syrup? Remember that horror movie "Children of the corn"? It is no coincidence that a scary movie used corn to frighten us. Somehow "Children of the Zucchini" just doesn't stir up the same feelings of fear. I suppose I could go on and most will look at me with disdain, but I ask you, how can we trust any food that looks the same coming out of us as it did going in. Be afraid, be very afraid. BRAISCO http://www.maxpages.com/humorcorner |
|
. |
| Visitors: 11448 |
|
PSYCHOTIC RAMBLINGS |
SLOKKO THE BI POLAR CAT |
LINK EM DANO |
CELEBRITY PUNCHOUT |
WEEKLY MIND PICKER |
ESP game | comment | faq | JOKE CENTER | cards | sign up | SWEEPSTAKES PAGE | trivia | cartoon | ryan | about | Dating Horror Stories |