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Things your mom would never
18 Ways to annoy your Public
34 Ways to annoy people
Technology for Country Folks
Hot chili pepper
Music Symphony
Bible Jokes
Giving cat a pill
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| Music Symphony A couple of years ago, the Seattle Symphony was doing Beethoven's Ninth under the baton of Milton Batter. At this point, you must understand two things: 1. Bass players hate playing Beethoven's 9th. There's a long segment in this symphony where the bass violins don't have a thing to do... not a single note for page after page! 2. There's a tavern called Dez's 400 right across the street from the Seattle Opera House, rather favored by local musicians. It had been decided that during this performance, after the bass players had played their parts in the opening of the Ninth, they were to quietly lay down their instruments and leave the stage rather than sit on their stools looking and feeling dumb for twenty minutes. Well, once they got backstage, someone suggested that they trot across the street and have a few brews. They had quickly downed the first couple rounds when one said, "Shouldn't we be getting back? It'd be awfully embarrassing if we were late." Another (presumably the one who suggested this excursion in the first place) replied, "Oh, I anticipated we could use a little more time, so I had tied a string around the last pages of the conductor's score. When he gets down to there, Batter's going to have to slow the tempo way down while he waves the baton with one hand and fumbles with the string with he other." So they all laughed, had another round and finally returned to the Opera House, a little tipsy by now. However, as they came back on stage, one look at their conductor's face told them they were in serious trouble. And if you thought things couldn't get worse, both first-stand players soon passed out right in their chairs! Batter was furious and on the verge of completely loosing it, as he began making gestures at the bases while trying to finish the piece and flip tied pages. (Here’s the best part) Batter was up at the bottom of the Ninth, the score was tied with the basses loaded and two men out. |
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