Dumb People - Not always the blondes or irish - Comedy & Humor - http://maxpages.com/foxyfun/Ways_to_describe_dumb

a prime example of these is Ryan!!!

1) Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
2) Not the brightest crayon in the box.
3) Not the sharpest tool in the shed.
4) A few clowns short of a circus.
5) A few fries short of a Happy Meal
6) A few Cokes short of a six-pack.
7) A few peas short of a casserole.
8) The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
9) One taco short of a combination plate.
10) A few feathers short of a whole duck.
11) All foam, no beer.
12) The cheese slid off his cracker.
13) Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
14) He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
15) An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
16) As smart as bait.
17) Chimney's clogged.
18) Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
19) Forgot to pay his brain bill.
20) Her sewing machine's out of thread.
21) His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
22) No grain in the silo.
23) Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
24) In the pinball game of life, his flippers were a little further apart than most.
25) Brung lipstick to a makeup test.
26) Not the smartest peanut in the turd.
27) Has the IQ of about a dinner plate.
28) Has the attention span of a jar of mayonaise.
29) A couple of sandwiches shy of a picnic. -
30) He/She has the directional sense of a waffle iron.
31) Is a bowl shy of a fruit salad.
32) The IQ of a salad bar.
33) The IQ of a warm glass of water.
34) Got it floored in reverse.
35) Full Throttle...Dry tank.
36) Dumb as a sack of hammers.
37) Dumb as a box of rocks.
38) Makes grass look smart.
39) Thick as too short planks.
40) Not the brightest star in the sky.
41) The lights are on but nobody's home.
42) You're so dumb you have to dig for your IQ.
43) Sharp as a bowling ball
44) Not the sharpest pencil in the case.
45) Not playing with a full deck.
46) His/her brain is on hold.
47) The engine's running but no one is behind the wheel
48) He rides the short bus to school
49) A few letters short of the alphabet
50) A curved line short of a circle
51) A few "NO"s short of a toddler
52) A few colors short of a rainbow
53) A few raisins short of California
54) A few snowflakes shy of a snowman
55) A few potatoes short of Idaho
56) A few criminals short of New York City
57) A few apples short of a bushel
58) A couple peeps short of a chicken
59) The wheels are turning, but the car's going nowhere
60) A few laughs short of a comedy
61) A few monkeys short of a zoo
62) A couple fleas short of a dog
63) A couple needles short of a doctor
64) One lie short of a lawyer
65) A tooth short of a crocodile
66) An almond short of mixed nuts
67) A few grains of sand short of a beach
68) Fluff straight from the pillow
69) A fire that just doesn't glow

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Page Updated Thu May 29, 2003 9:23am EDT