- You're so poor that when you take a bath it becomes a family thing!
- You stink so bad you make Right Guard turn left, Secret obvious, and Sure confused.
- Your house is so dirty, I had to wipe my feet before I came outside.
- Your mama's so old, her dreams are in black and white!
- Your ass is so tight, you fart and only dogs can hear it.
- Your mama's so fat she went on an airplane and it turned into a boat.
- Your mama's so stupid, when they said the drinks were on the house, she went up to the roof.
- What do turtles and blondes have in common? If they're on their back, they're screwed!

More to come!
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