Things you shouldn't say... - The goal is to help them, not hurt them. - Health - http://maxpages.com/elliesownpage/What_NOT_to

"You don't look too skinny."

Translation: They think I am lying. I never should have told them. I am a fake. I need to work harder at losing weight, and eat less. I have to get sicker. Maybe then they will believe me.

"Just eat healthy foods, and you will be fine."

The Eating Disordered person is an expert of what's healthy, unhealthy, how many calories they need in a day, etc. They don't need someone constantly reminding them.

"You better stay out of the bathroom!"

Trying to inhibit someone from practicing their eating disorder is going to make them more determinded to do it. The best thing to do is to back off. Let their doctor/therapist handle that.

"What did I do to make you like this?" "Can't you see how much you are hurting me/us?"

Translation: You are making everyone around you miserable. It would be easier if you were not here.

The truth is, they are NOT doing it to YOU. They are doing it to themselves, and it is quite selfish of you to act like you are the one going through all the misery. Think of what they are going through.

"You look so disgusting! Why can't you see that?!"

Would you walk up to an overweight person and tell them that they looked terrible and disgusting? NO. So, why would you do it to someone who is underweight? When you say that, it is a true reflection that you care quite a bit about appearance, and the eating disordered person does NOT need that in their life. They need to be reassured that YOU will LOVE them no matter what they looked like.

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Ellie

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help4eds@yahoo.com

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Page Updated Sun Aug 12, 2001 11:20pm EDT