Eminem - songs 17-20 - Songs - http://maxpages.com/crazybaby/The_Slim_Shady

17: As The World Turns

I dont know why this world keep turning
Round and Round
But I wish it would stop, and let me off right now

Yes man
As the World Turns
We all experience things in life
Trials and Tribulations
That we all must go through
When someone wants to test us
When someone tries our patience

I hang with a bunch of hippies and wacky tobacco planters
Who swallow lit roaches and light up like jack-o-lanterns
Outsiders baby, and we suing the courts
Cuz we're dope as fuck and only get a 2 in the source
They never should've booted me out of reform school
Deformed fool, takin the shit, now warn Bulls
They threw me out the Ramada Inn
I said it wasn't me, I got a twin (Oh my god its you! Not again!)
It all started when my mother took my bike away
Cuz I murdered my guinea pig and stuck him in the microwave
After that, It was straight to the 40 ouncers
Slappin teachers, and jackin off in front of my counselors
Class clown freshman, dressed like Les Nessman
Fuck the next lesson, I'll past the test guessin
And all the other kids said Eminem's a dishead
He'll never last, the only class he'll pass is phys ed
May be true, till I told this bitch in gym class
That she was too fat to swim laps, she needed Slim Fast (Who Me?)
Yeah bitch you so big you walked into big Tanny's and stepped on Jenny Craig
She picked me up to snap me like a skinny twig
Put me in the headlock, then I thought of my guinea pig
I felt the evilness and started transformin (RARRRR!)
It began storming, I heard a bunch of cheering fans swarming
Grabbed that bitch by her hair
Drug her across the ground
And took her up to the highest diving board and tossed her down
Sorry coach, its too late to tell me stop
While I drop this bitch face down and watch her belly flop

I dont know why this world keep turning
Round and Round
But I wish it would stop, and let me off right now

As the World Turns
These are the days of our lives
These are the things that we must go through
Day by day

We drive around in million dollar sports cars
While little kids hide this tape from their parents like bad report cards
Outsiders, and we suing the courts
Cuz we dope as fuck and only get a 2 in The Source
Hypercondriac, hanging out at the laundromat
Where all the raunchy fat white trashy blondes be at
Dressed like a sailor, standin by a pale of garbage
Its almost dark and I'm still tryna nail a trailor park bitch
I met a slut and said "What up, its nice to meet ya"
I'd like to treat ya to a Faygo and a slice of pizza
But I'm broke as fuck and I don't get paid till the first of next month
But if you care to join me, I was bout to roll this next blunt
But I aint got no weed, no phillies, or no papers
Plus I'm a rapist and a repeated prison escapist
So gimme all your money
And don't try nothin funny
Cuz you know your stinkin ass is too fat to try to outrun me
I went to grab my gun
Thats when her ass put it on me
Wit an uppercut and hit me with a basket of laundry
I fell through the glass doors
Started causin a scene
Then slid across the floor and flew right into a washin machine
Jumped up with a broken back
Thank god I was smokin crack all day
And doped up off coke and smack
All I wanted to do was rape the bitch and snatch her purse
Now I wanna kill her
But so I gotta catch her first
Ran threw alleys, parkin lots, and took a shortcut
Saw the house she ran up in
And shot her fuckin porch up
Kicked the door down to murder this divorced slut
Looked around the room
Thats when I seen the bedroom door shut
I know you're in there bitch! I got my gun cocked!
You might as well come out now
She said "Come in, its unlocked!"
I walked in and all I smelled was Liz Claiborne
And seen her spread across the bed naked watchin gay porn
She said "Come her big boy, lets get acquainted"
I turned around to run, twisted my ankle and sprained it
She came at me at full speed, nothin could stop her
I shot her five times and every bullet bounced off her
I started to beg "No, please let go"
But she swallowed my fuckin leg whole like an egg roll
With one leg left, now I'm hoppin around crippled
I grabbed my pocket knife and sliced off her right nipple
Just trying to buy me some time, then I remembered this magic trick
Den Den Den Den Den Den, Go go gadget dick!
Whipped that shit out, and aint no doubt about it
It hit the ground and caused an earthquake and power outage
I shouted "Now bitch, lets see who gets the best!"
Stuffed that shit in crooked and fucked that fat slut to death (Ahh!! Ahhh!)
Come here bitch!
Come here!
Take this motherfuckin dick!
Bitch, come here!

I dont know why this world keep turning
Round and Round
But I wish it would stop, and let me off right now

And as we go along
Throughout the days of our lives
We all face small obstacles and challenges every day
That we must go through
These are the things that surround us through our atmohsphere
Every Day
Every single day the world keeps turning

18: I'm Shady

Who came through with two glocks to terrorize your borough (Huh?)
Told you how to slap dips and murder your girl (I did)
Gave you all the finger and told you to sit and twirl
Sold a billion tapes and still screamed fuck the world (Slim Shady)
so come and kill me while my name's hot
And shoot me twenty five times in the same spot (Ow)
Think I've got a generation brainwashed
To pop pills and smoke pot till they brains rot (Uh, oh?)
Stop they blood flow until they veins clot
I need a pain shot, and a shot of plain scotch
Purple haze and acid raindrops
Spiked the punch at the party and drank pop (gulp gulp)
Shaved my armpits and wore a tank top
Bad Boy, I told you that I can't stop
Gotta make 'em fear you before you make 'em feel you
So everybody buy my shit or I'ma come and kill you

I got mushrooms
I got acid
I got tabs and aspirin tablets
I'm your brother when you need some new weed to set you free
You know me I'm your friend when you need a mini-thin (Slim Shady)
I'm Shady!

I like happy things
I'm really calm and peaceful (Uh huh huh)
I like birds, bees, I like people
I like funny things that make me happy and gleeful
Like when my teacher sucked my wee-wee in preschool (Woo!)
The ill type, I stab myself with a steel spike
While I blow my brain out just to see what it feels like
And this is how I am in real life
I don't want to just die a normal death, I wanna be killed twice (Uh huh)
How you wanna scare somebody with a gun threat
When they're high off of drugs they haven't even done yet
So bring the money by tonight
Cause your wife says this is the biggest knife she ever saw in her life (Help me help me)
I try to keep it positive and play it cool
Shoot up the playground and tell the kids to stay in school (Stay in school!)
Cause I'm the one they can relate to and look up to better
Tonight I think I'll write my biggest fan a fuck you letter

I got mushrooms
I got acid
I got tabs and aspirin tablets
I'm your brother when you need some new weed to set you free
You know me I'm your friend when you need a mini-thin (Slim Shady)
I'm Shady!

I listen to your demo tape and act like I don't like it (Aw that shit is wack)
Six months later you hear your lyrics on my shit (Hey that's my shit!)
People don't buy shit no more they just dub it
That's why I'm still broke and had the number one club hit (Yup, uh huh)
But they love it when you make your business public
So fuck it, I've got herpes while we're on the subject (Uh huh)
And if I told you I had AIDS y'all would play it
Cause you stupid motherfuckers think I'm playing when I say it
Well, I do take pills
I don't do speed
I Don't do crack
I don't do coke
I do smoke weed
I Don't do smack
I do do shrooms
I Do drink beer
I just wanna make a few things clear
My baby mama's not dead (nuh uh)
she's still alive and bitching (yup)
And I don't have herpes, my dick's just itching
It's not syphillis, and as for being AIDS infested
I don't know yet, I'm too scared to get tested

I got mushrooms
I got acid
I got tabs and aspirin tablets
I'm your brother when you need some new weed to set you free
You know me I'm your friend when you need a mini-thin (Slim Shady)
I'm Shady!

I told you I was Shady
Y'all didn't wanna believe me
I'm Shady
And that's my name

19: Bad Meets Evil

I reckon you ain't familiar with these here parts
You know, there's a story behind that there saloon
Twenty years ago, two outlaws took this whole town over
Sheriffs couldn't stop em
Quickest damn gun slingers I've ever seen
Got murdered in cold blood
That ol' saloon there was their little home away from home
They say the ghosts of Bad and Evil still live in that tavern
And on a quiet night
You can still hear the footsteps of Slim Shady and Royce Da Five-Nine...

I don't speak, I float in the air wrapped in a sheet
I'm not a real person, I'm a ghost trapped in a beat
I translate when my voice is read through a sismograph
And a noise is bred, picked up and transmitted through Royce's head
Trapped him in his room, possessed him and hoist his bed
Till the evilness flows through his blood like poisonous lead
Told him each one of his boys is dead
I asked him to come to the dark side, he made a choice and said

Who hard? yo I done heard worse
We can get in two cars and accelerate at each other
To see which one'll swerve first
Two blind bandits panic, whose mental capacity holds
That of a globe on top of nine other planets
Kissed the cheek of the devil
Intelligence level is hellier than treble peakin on speakers in the ghetto
Dismissal, I'm not a fair man, disgraced the race of a atheist
Intercepting missles with my bare hands like a patriot
One track sliced without swords, I buried the Christ corpse
In my past life when the Black Knight mounted the white horse
And stay over-worked, its like the Nazis in the nations
Collaborating, attemptin to take over the earth

Cuz this is what happens when Bad Meets Evil
We hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Above the law cuz I don't agree wit police either (shit, me neither)

We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me with the keys to your Jeep Eagle
I breathe ether in three amounts
When I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle
Releasin rage on anybody in squeezing range
Cold enough to make the seasons change into freezing rain
(He's insane) No I'm not, I just want to shoot up and I'm pissed off
Cuz I can't find a decent vain

The disaster with dreds
I'm bad enough to commit suicide and survive long enough
To kill my soul after I'm dead
When in danger it's funny actually my flavor's similar to a waiter
Cuz I serve any stranger with money
I spray a hundred, man until they joint chains
While slippin bullets at point blank range like they was punches
Piss on a flag and burn it, murder you then come to your funeral
Serve this lobbyist, strangle your body then confirm you
Whippin human ass, throwin blows crackin jaws
With my fists wrapped in gause, dipped in glue and glass
I'm blazin MC's, at the same time amazin MC's
Somehow MC's ain't that eye-brow raisin to me
From all of angles of us, flash a mack loud enough to cast a avalanche
And bust till volcanoes errupt

Hello? (Billy) Hey yo (we're comin to get you)
STOP, THEY KNOW IT'S US!!

I used to be a loudmouth, remember me? (uh-ah)
I'm the one who burned your house down (oh)
Well I'm out now (shit), and this time I'm comin back to blow your house up
And I ain't gon leave you a window to jump out of
Give me two fat tabs and three shrooms
And you won't see me like fat people in steam rooms
And when I go to hell and I'm gettin ready to leave
I'ma put air in a bag and charge people to breathe

Cuz this is what happens when Bad Meets Evil
And we hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Against peaceful, see you in hell for the sequel
(We'll be waitin) See you in hell
Wall Street, Royce Da Five-Nine, Slim Shady
See you in hell for the sequel (bye bye)
Bad Meets Evil, what? (till next time)

And so that's the story when Bad Meets Evil
Two of the most wanted individuals in the county
Made Jesse James and Billy the Kid look like law-abiding citizens
It's too bad they had to go out the way they did
Got shot in the back comin out of that ol' saloon
But their spirits still live on to this day
Shhh... wait, did y'all hear that?

20: Still Don't Give A Fuck

A lot of people ask me
am I afraid of death?
Hell yeah I'm afraid of death
I don't want to die yet
A lot of people think that I worship the devil
that I do all types of.. retarded shit
Look, I can't change the way I think
And I can't change the way I am
But if I offended you? Good
Cause I still don't give a fuck

I'm zonin off of one joint, stoppin a limo
Hopped in the window, shoppin a demo at gunpoint
A lyricist without a clue, what year is this?
Fuck a needle, here's a sword, bodypierce with this
Livin amuk, never givin a fuck
Gimme the keys I'm drunk, and I've never driven a truck
But I smoke dope in a cab
I'll stab you with the sharpest knife I can grab
Come back the next week and re-open your scab
A killer instinct runs in the blood
Emptyin full clips and buryin guns in the mud
I've calmed down now I was heavy once into drugs
I could walk around straight for two months with a buzz
My brain's gone, my soul's worn and my spirit is torn
The rest of my body's still bein operated on
I'm ducked the fuck down while I'm writin this rhyme
Cause I'm probably gonna get struck with lightnin this time

For all the weed that I've smoked - yo this blunts for you
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
To all the friends I used to have - yo I miss my past
But the rest of you assholes can kiss my ass
For all the drugs that I've done - yo I'm still gon' do
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
For everytime I reminisce - I miss my past
But I still don't give a fuck y'all can kiss my ass

I walked into a gunfight with a knife to kill you
And cut you so fast when your blood spilled it was still blue
I'll hang you till you dangle and chain you with both ankles
And pull you apart from both angles
I wanna crush your skull till your brains leaks out of your veins
And bust open like broken water mains
So tell Saddam not to bother with makin another bomb
Cause I'm crushin the whole world in my palm
Got your girl on my arm and I'm armed with a firearm
So big my entire arm is a giant firebomb
Buy your mom a shirt with a Slim Shady iron-on
And the pants to match (Here momma try em on)
I get a master ticked with a mouth full of adjectives
a brain full of adverbs, and a box full of laxatives
(Shittin on rappers) Causin hospital accidents
God help me before I commit some irresponsible acts again

For all the weed that I've smoked - yo this blunts for you
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
To all the friends I used to have - yo I miss my past
But the rest of you assholes can kiss my ass
For all the drugs that I've done - yo I'm still gon' do
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
For everytime I reminisce - I miss my past
But I still don't give a fuck y'all can kiss my ass

I wanted an album so rugged nobody could touch it
Spend a million a track and went over my budget (Oh shit)
Now how in the fuck am I supposed to get out of debt?
I can't rap anymore I just murdered the alphabet
Drug sickness got me doin some bugged twitches
I'm withdrawn from crack so bad my blood itches
I don't rap to get the women fuck bitches
Give me a fat slut that cooks and does dishes
Never ran with a clique I'm a posse
Kamikaze, strappin a motherfuckin bomb across me
From the second I was born, my momma lost me
I'm a cross between Manson, Esham and Ozzy
I don't know why the fuck I'm here in the first place
My worst day on this earth was my first birthday
Retarded? What did that nurse say? Brain damage?
Fuck, I was born during the earthquake

For all the weed that I've smoked - yo this blunts for you
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
To all the friends I used to have - yo I miss my past
But the rest of you assholes can kiss my ass
For all the drugs that I've done - yo I'm still gon' do
To all the people I've offended - yeah fuck you too!
For everytime I reminisce - I miss my past
But I still don't give a fuck y'all can kiss my ass

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Page Updated Sat Aug 5, 2000 11:14am EDT