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Jokes 2
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Sleigh Bells|
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| Do you have a joke? Send it in! I can't promise they will all be posted but I will try to post them all. |
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| The Interveiw | You know your too serious about computers when... |
| Three guys go in for a job interview, all at the same office. The first one goes in for his interview and the interviewer says, "What's the first thing you see when you look at me?" The guy says, "That's not too hard, you've got no ears." The interviewer says, "That's it, get out, you'll never be seen around here again." The second man takes his turn and is asked the same question. The applicant replies, "Uh, you've got no ears." The interviewer throws the guy out, cursing and yelling that he'll never get a job with his company. As the second guy is leaving, the second guy warns the third guy, "Listen man, whatever you do, don't say he hasn't got any ears. He's really touchy about it." "Okay," said man #3 on his way into the office. Once inside he is told, "Name the first thing you notice when you look at me." The guy answers, "That's easy, you wear contacts." The interviewer is flabbergasted. "How on earth did you know that, son?" The applicant answered, "What? Are you stupid? You can't wear glasses, you got no ears!" |
*When you find it easier to dial-up the National Weather Service Weather/your_town/now.html than to simply look out the window. *When you start using phrases like: Hungry.must-eat.food.now@home *If you have a heart attack when you forgot to pay your phone bill and receive a "pending disconnection of service" notice. *When you order most of what you buy... online. *If your fingers quit moving because you've been online for 36 hours. *When you find yourself engaged to someone you've never actually met; except through e-mail. *When you log-off from a session in your favorite newsgroup... and you log reads: Online time: 56 hours 24 minutes. *If you did an error-free installation of Windows 95. *When your modem starts smoking. *If no one can reach you by phone since your computer is always online. *If you log-off your system only because it's time to go to work. *If you call in sick because you found a great new WWW site. *If you can type your top 10 favorite Web sites, by heart. *If you can locate a particular home page without using a search engine. *If you can write your own html page. *If while reading a magazine, you look for the Zoom icon for a better look at a photograph. *You comment, while watching a sunset, that the image would be enhance with 10% more magenta and a higher resolution. *If while driving down the street, you are confused by the numbers on the houses - they do not appear to be legitimate WWW addresses. *When someone tells you to remember something, and you look for File/Save command. *When you discover there is no little car icon with a forward arrow on the dashboard of your car, to make it go. *When you think the File/Kill command should apply to your system administrator. *When you add your third modem and dedicated phone line. *If you access Microsoft's Web page every Sunday morning for Brother Bill's sermon. *When that 112Gb hard drive is full. *When your desk collapses under the weight of your computer peripherals. |
| The Gorrilla Joke | !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SEND IN YOUR JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| A man woke up one morning, looked out the window, and saw a huge gorilla in the tree in his back yard. Feeling very nervous, he grabbed the phonebook and looked up gorilla exterminators in the Yellow Pages. He called the exterminator, who said he would be right out. The exterminator arrived in a van, hopped out, and opened the door. He took out a large net, a shotgun, and a fierce-looking dog. "OK", he said, "this is how it works: I climb the tree and shake it and the gorilla falls to the ground. The dog runs over and bites him in a vital spot. While he's disabled, you throw the net over him. I'll come down and we'll tie him up." As the exterminator started up the tree, the man called, "What do I do with the shotgun?". The exterminator said, "Sometimes when I shake the tree, the gorilla shakes it back and I fall out of the tree. If that happens, you shoot the dog." Okay,so mabey my jokes arn't as good as Rachael's,but here goes. So this sausage walks into a bar,and asks for a drink,and the bartender says:" Sorry ,we don't serve food." |
I mean it! We need more jokes and the owners can only get so many. If you have a joke, even if it's not really funny at all, please send it in!!!!! There's only one rule, which is nothing inapropriate (I have no idea how to spell that). We already have 1 person who sent us jokes but she doesn't want to be named. So here they are: Q: What did one flea say to the other? A: Shall we walk or take the dog? Q: What kind of saw do you use to cut the sea in half? A: A SEA-saw. Q: Why didn't the skelton cross the road? A: Because he didn't have the guts! |
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