Thinking about things on this late night passed 4AM has me in the mood to talk about a few issues at hand. Specifically, social behaviors as of late. If you read Part 1 of "My Friends", you'd realize that things are much much different now than they were when that article was published over 2 years ago. The names, faces, actions, and places have changed, clearly for the better...
Although something odd has happened during the transition from the then to now.
There are less girls.
I'm not sure if this is positive or negative really, but it's a fact that's crossed my mind in spurts lately, and I think now is as good a time as ever to revisit my platonic relationships with girls nowadays, seeing as though I no longer have a "go-to" group of girls.
First off, lets define what "go-to" girls are. "Go-to" girls are girls that I can call up at any point in time to hang out and shoot the shit casually with no worry about the awkward silence of having nothing to talk about. In other words, girls I can have a comfortable silence with are good candidates for falling under "go-to" girls.
I have few of those left. Yeah, there are a couple out there, but they fall more on an individual basis than a group basis. I'm not a fan of mixing in individuals with groups really. It's hard to establish relationships like that without things being awkward. On top of that, I like to keep my crews of people separate to begin with. This way, I can avoid boredom and have more than one option over the course of a night. I like to be selfish in this regard.
In the last few years since "My Friends Part 1" was published, the "go-to" girls have practically gone extinct. Sure, there were plenty of opportunities to have girls like that around, but I'll only mention two of them because they are doubtlessly the most popular groups of people to have ever graced the home page of The Essential: The Marian Catholic Girls and the Lincoln-Way Girls.
All of a sudden, you're interested, aren't you?
The Marian Cathlolic Girls were the most interesting group of girls I've come across in public. They are practically legendary amongst our little local cliques. First off, they were a group of hot-ass girls who had an interest in being with us. YES, US. (Ok. I mean "us" as in everyone but myself since I didn't talk all night.) I didn't believe it myself, but it was true. I won't put you through all the gory details about that night at the pool hall and Baker's Square, but I'm sure you can recall the enthusiasm I had when writing about them. Anyway, they failed to become "go-to" girls cuz of disinterest, lack of effort, influence, distance, overpursuit, whatever. The fact is, nothing tangible came of them and their phone numbers remain untouched relics in Muj's and Andrew's rolodex.
Taking that in, those of us who were there to remember the circumstances of that time know that our mistakes with them cannot be made again.
Needless to say, we made similar mistakes with the Lincoln-Way Girls. These girls were hot, available, and interesting as well, but without the quantity (which in the end was a major downfall in my mind).
They're not grand mistakes or anything. They're just mistakes under the product of circumstance. The crew now is far different from the crew back in February, so the agendas were different, and therefore, the behavior was different. Like I said, different faces and difference faces.
Granted, we're not far removed from the Lincoln-Way Girls. I know some would argue we're not at all removed from those girls, but them hanging out with us, then them almost all at once getting boyfriends at the same time makes me think otherwise. We had them in our pockets as "go-to" girls, but something clicked inside of me that said it wasn't gonna happen, then sure enough, two of them get boyfriends. Great.
Back to square one.
So those were our shots. We'll have plenty of shots in the future, but those are tough losses to cut and it's starting to show. I've noticed not long after those debacles with those girls, the group dynamic started to shift, and not for the better. Those were high risk, high reward girls in both cases, and the risk kicked our asses big time. We're still recovering to this day.
Now I'm not saying every group of guys out there should go out there and hunt like a fucking wolf just to have the sweet fruits of female company. Your guy friends should always be enough to get you through the weekend, but the "go-to" girls can be a very nice complement. Maybe the Marian Catholic Girls and LW Girls wouldn't have made good complements for us, but it would have been nice to at least been given a fair shot to find out.
The result of the aftermath of the LW Girls is basically a loss of communication amongst us. Some people are doing different things outside of the clique. We all want to be great friends, but all of us guys have this little shitty chip implanted in our heads that we cant live without the company of girls. Im one of them, and actually Im quite proud. I know my friends will all come back together soon enough, and well be shootin the shit in Bobs basement. But someday, even if we did get back as close as we were over the summer, the statement that has haunted some of us since February 2003 will always come back around:
Damn, we gotta find some girls.
(To Be Continued
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