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| Those blond jokes |
| What did the blonde say when he opened the box of Cheerios? Doughnut seeds! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why did the blonde tip toe past the medicine cabinet ? So she wouldn't wake up the Sleeping Pills -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day? When her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How did the blonde hurt herself raking the lawn? She fell out of the tree! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blond is angry, She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells "No, honey, don't do it." The blond replies "Shut up, you're next." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was three girls a brown head, a red head, and a blonde head. They where going to go on a hike in the desert and the brown head said she would take some food if they got hungry, the red head said she would bring water if they got thirsty, and the blonde head said she'd bring a car door........so if they got hot she could roll down the window. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A blonde was telling a priest a Pollock joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "do you want me to start over and talk slower?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last night I went home to my blonde girlfriend, and told her I was going to screw her brains out. Then I realized I was too late. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This guy just started at his new job, working at a porno shop. His boss comes out and tells him that he has to leave for a while, and "can you handle it?" The new employee is somewhat reluctant, but with the boss's positive comments he finally agrees. So, the guy is there by himself for a little while and a white woman comes in. She asks, "How much for the white dildo?" He answers, "$35." She, "How much for the black one?" He, "$35 for the black one, $35 for the white one." She, "I think I'll take the black one. I've never had a black one before." She pays him, and off she goes. A little bit later a black woman comes in and asks "How much for the black dildo?" He, "$35." She, "How much for the white one?" He, "$35 for the white one, $35 for the black one." She, "I think I'll take the white one. I've never had a white one before." She pays him, and off she goes. About an hour later a young blonde woman comes in and asks, "How much are your dildos?" He, "$35 for the white, $35 for the black." She, How much is that plaid one on the shelf?" He, "Well, that's a very special dildo it'll cost you $165." She thinks for a moment and answers, "I'll take the plaid one, I've never had a plaid one before." She pays him, and off she goes. Finally, the guy's boss returns and asks, "How did you do while I was gone?" To which the saleman responded, "I did really good, I sold one white dildo, one black dildo, and I sold your thermos for $165!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Another blonde sent a post card home: "Having a wonderful time....Where am I?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette said that her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Head and Shoulders" and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively, "How do you give shoulders?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was a blonde driving down the road listening to the radio. The announcer was telling blonde joke after blonde joke until the blonde was mad enough she turned her radio off. A mile down the road, she saw another blonde out in a corn field in a boat rowing. The blonde stopped her car jumped out and yelled, "You bimbo, it's blondes like you that give us all a bad name. If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals. She proudly said," go ahead,ask me, I know all of them." A red head said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, W." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- what do blondes and computers have in common? you dont appreicate either one till they go down on you -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- why do blondes were underwear ? to keep there ankles warm -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: Why don't blonds play frisbee? A: It hurts their teeth |
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