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Where Do They All Belong?
Love has always been a sacred foundation of society, and Shakespeare has formed many plays out of the concept. This great playwrite, like many after him, have realized one of the intriguing concepts in the world cannot visibly be seen. That concept is love. Obviously, one of Shakespeare’s favorite concepts must have been love as A Midsummer Night’s Dream proves. The great playwrite used this popular line, “the course of true love never did run smooth” (I.i.134) to express one of his many views on the emotion. The man obviously thought about it a lot, and he was a pessimist in this respect possibly. He goes to great length to prove this quote in his play.
To begin, when Lysander and Hermia are first introduced in the play, they cannot be together, because of Hermia’s overbearing father, Egeus. The lovers want to be married, but it is forbidden by Theseus, the king of Athens. Even with this weight over their relationship, Lysander comforts Hermia,
If then true lovers have been ever crossed,
It stands as an edict in destiny:
Then let us teach our trial patience,
Because it is a customary cross,
As due to love as thoughts and dreams and sighs,
Wishes and tears, poor Fancy’s followers.” (I.i.150-5)
Lysander loves Hermia and Hermia loves him, and this quote proves that even though the hardship may be harsh, they will stick together no matter what. The second example of Lysander and Hermia’s relationship hitting big heavy rocks of evil, is when Lysander falls in love with Helena upon being effected by Puck’s twisted spell. When Lysander falls under the ghastly spell, he says this to forlorn Helena, “Content with Hermia! No; I do repent / The tensions minutes I with her have spent / Not Hermia but Helena I love: / Who will not change a raven for a dove?”(II.ii.111-114). This is Hermia’s worst nightmare. How can she go on without her Lysander? Everything gets put back together again in the end, however, this does prove Shakespeare’s point.
Moving onto the second couple, the first conclusion from Helena and Demetrius is that one side has no love, and the other side too much. This relationship looks like it is going nowhere. Demetrius, the one with zero love for Helena, says, “I love thee not therefore pursue me not”(II.i.188). Demetrius hates Helena and wants absolutely nothing to with her. There is definite hardship in this union. However, then a miracle happens, Puck’s spell makes Demetrius fall in love with Helena, it is the other side that is denied. When Demetrius finally declares his beautiful love for the wary Helena, she denies him. Helena believes he is only teasing her, “If you were civil and knew courtesy, / You would not do me thus injury. / Can you not hate me, as I know you do, / But you must join in souls to mock me too?”(III.ii.147-150). When things finally look like they could turn out happy for the pair. Suffering for the lovers never seems to end.
In fairy land, there is even more lovers’ quarrels afoot. Oberon and Titania are in a word battle. Titania does not want Oberon to have the changeling she possesses, for she loved the boy’s mother. Oberon is in a horrible fluster now, when he replies, “Do you amend it, then; it lies in you: / Why should Titania cross her Oberon? / I do beg a little Changeling boy, / To be my henchmen.”(II.i.118-121). Oberon wants the changeling boy even though Titania is opposed to this. Hardship seems to follow lovers like a hobo to cake. The situation then progresses with Oberon making Titania fall in love with an Assman. It works and she is enamored with Assman, saying to him,
I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again:
Mine ear is much enamored of thy note;
So is mine eye enthralled to thy shape;
And thy fair virtue’s force per force doth move me
On the trust view to say, to swear, I love thee.” (III.i.137-141)
This is hilarious, bizarre, and sad all at the same time. It seems Shakespeare had to find the weirdest way possible to prove his point and he did. Not only is Titania affected by this awkward relationship but Oberon too. He feels bad for her and frees her from the spell apparently to live happily ever after. That is after she finally concedes and gives her fairy lover the boy.
The statement, “the course of true love never did run smooth” (I.i.134), is now easily proven both by Shakespeare in A Midsummer Night’s Dream, and by true life couples. Love is overwhelmingly mystical and unusual. Maybe Shakespeare saw this when he wrote the play. As with the play, he must’ve seen something in people when he wrote this famous line. Maybe he saw that humans can never have anything perfect. There always has to be conflict. Human beings need to feel like they arrived somewhere, and if everything just went right as rain they’d feel like something was wrong. Perhaps suffering is built into every single person on earth. Or possibly nothing is ever easy, and nothing will ever go perfect.

MAN IN LOVE WITH FROG
Police chief Wigum caught Puck robbing another house. When he entered the house, he found Puck laying on a bed, drueling a yellow fluid from his gaping jaws. The Chief questioned why he was on it and found out it was a Craftmatic Adjustable bed. On further inspection, he told us it was the most comfortable bed he has ever slept on. We asked him why he was sleeping on the bed while he was supposed to arresting Puck. He continued to state that he was tired from a hard morning's work and hadn't had his morning donuts so he took a nap to test out the bed. When Wigum awoke, he found himself in the forest, buck nude, with the most beautiful thing he had ever seen: Jeremiah, a bullfrog and the best damn kisser he had ever well kissed. We asked him why the frog's name was Jeremiah, and he went crazy. Accusing us of calling him a flaming homosexual, not there is any wrong with that. He continued to say that Jeremiah was a girl's name too. When we talked to Mrs. Wigum about this, she only had a few choice words, "The man has always had homosexual tendencies," she then proceeded to throw out all of The Chief's belongings, even his dog Toto.

CHILI CONTEST IS GETTING HOT
Puck was caught putting magic into rivals Demetrius and Lysander's chili in this year's annual event. The 13th annual chili cook off started off early with the defending champion, Puck, disqualified for cheating. The finals were down to Demetrius, Lysander, Oberon, and Chief Wigum. When we asked the judges, Theseus and Hippolyta, what they were looking for, Hippolyta told us that she was looking for chili. Theseus said he was looking for an organic chili, not the other kind of chili. At the end of the day, though, Wigum won after telling Hippolyta his was the best and that the others' chili would eat her if she ate it. Second place went to Demetrius after he and Lysander got into a dual. Lysander was nearly killed after Demetrius threw his chili into Lysander's eyes, and then attacked him.

PYRIMUS AND THISBY MAKE IT TO THE BIG TIME
The play, "Pyrimus and Thisby", has rave reviews from everyone. The play was performed at Theseus's and Hippolyta's wedding. The original show was performed by broke town's people looking for a job, so they were replaced with an all-star cast with names like Operah, Michael Jackson, Elmer Fudd, and Homer Simpson. They are already having problems with the play. Operah and Jackson both wanted to be Thisby. Jackson did not get the Thisby part and is now playing the part of the lion. When we asked the director why he was the lion he told us, "It was a part where there was a mask over his head, and you don't hear him talk that much." Jackson then appeared beside the director, poked him and said 'boop!' then ran off again.

THE SEASONS ARE RESTORED
Just in time for winter, the seasons are restored. We were at 74 degrees yesterday, today it it's a cool -13. Thank Oberon and Titania for the nice weather today, if you're able to make it threw the snow. There is going to a meeting tomorrow at dawn in City Hall to discuss ways to break them up or at least until Spring comes back around. If you know a good way to break them up, other than killing one or both of them, please come to the meeting.

MAGIC KILLING OUR SOCIETY
Magic has been around a long time and the war to stop this is getting some help. Magruf, a magic sniffing dog is now on the job. Magic is a very bad substance that is getting in our youth's hands, noses and mouths, and God knows where else. We asked a three-year-old we'll call Jimmy what he knew about this. Jimmy was so ashamed that before we could even ask him some serious questions, he ran off calling out for his mommy. We also talked to chief Wigum. He had this to say, "What's wrong with magic, it can't hurt you so what is the problem?" He is right, it can't hurt you, but what can it do? Jimmy was latered found baked to death in a magical oven when his mother, high off magic, mistook him for a turkey.

MICHAEL JACKSON LOVES LITTLE FAIRIES
"I love fairies, they're so adorable," says Jackson, "they make me all happy, you know, I just want to hug them." Yes, my friends, It is now reported, Jackson has a horrible obscession with fairies. "I see a fairy, and I'm like Yippee! you know? Oh God, I can't believe I'm saying this." Jackson punches himself in the face, "I love sparkles. They make me very very very happy." The pop legend now starts taking off his pants and reveals tights. He smiles and pulls his pants back on.
"This is so emotional right now," Jackson continues, "you don't know what it's like saying this for the first time." Michael runs off now to some foreign land named Neverland, where no 'meanies' can ever bother him again.

Man is Sick but Still Good!
In Until They Bring The Streetcars Back by Stanley Gordon West, Man’s inhumanity is astounding. There’s torture, beating, humiliation, incest, murder, and bloodshed. While this is fun and all, this theme is also true of real Man. Humankind is violent, sex-obsessed, and barbaric. Its thirst for blood is like a ticking clock: it never stops. Stanley Gordon West’s book proves this theory in many ways. He gives examples left and right. Some smack you in the face; others are more quiet and take a while to sink in how cruel they really, really are. In this paper, Man’s cruelty to his animals, teenagers’ abuses to each other, and a father’s cruelty to his daughter, will be discussed.
Man is incredibly violent to animals. If they can’t defend themselves, let’s beat ‘um! If they can defend themselves, well, let’s beat ‘um some more! The first example of this in Until They Bring the Streetcars Back is definitely the children torturing the defenseless bunny. Cal describes the situation as such, “Four lousy grade school boys had snared a cottontail and had it staked out with a string tied to one of its hind legs. The little creeps were taking turns throwing a homemade spear at the rabbit, a long willow stick with an open jackknife tied to one end, and the bunny leaped and jerked like crazy and kept crashing to the ground when it hit the end of the string” (West 10). This is disturbing. Even our wee young ones are bloodthirsty little devils who love pain and suffering. Seems Lord of the Flies-y, doesn’t it? Perhaps more disturbing would be grown adults who understand pain but let it happen anyway. McCluskey, Cal’s neighbor, has a dog he abuses. The old Irishman beats him and starves him, “the guy had a high wood fence around his yard and he never took care of the scrawny dog and left it out for days at a time, even in winter, and he never gave it water or mercy or anything. Sometimes when the dog was whining you could hear McCluskey come out and beat it and it would cry and yelp and everything and it really make me mad,” (West 15). The dog suffers, it yelps in pain, but the owner doesn’t care. The owner turns a blind eye to the agony of the lonely mutt. Humankind is terrible to his beasts, letting them bleed without wrapping up the wounds.
A second case of Man’s cruelty in Until They Bring the Streetcars Back is the cruelty high schoolers have toward one another. They are relentlessly vindictive to their piers in Stanley Gordon West’s novel. For example, Cal’s friends, who have never even spoken to Gretchen, make fun of her for what she looks like. Even Cal, at the beginning, agrees. Lola, little perfect Lola, describes Gretchen as “‘Gretch the Wretch’” (West 8). Steve, with a gimp leg and a troubled past, says, “‘She looks like she died two years ago and is still walking around’” (West 20). What does this mean? They don’t know what Gretchen has been through. That she is raped and whipped by her father on a continual basis. That she has been so psychologically abused that she is afraid to speak to anyone. Possibly it means that they are laying their insecurities onto Gretchen. It is sad and cruel. At least this is behind her back, because when the younger freshmen make fun of her, it’s downright disrespect. They corner her at her locker and make fun of her apparent ugliness and shyness. The younger kids believe she is weaker than them and they pounce on the opportunity and try to gain from it. This is vicious and sad. They are vultures who feast on carcasses. It is clear, in the early years kids are deathly cruel. This fact, even in its sadness, carries on into the adults in an even worse way, brutal violence.
The most hideous example of the brutality of Man in Until They Bring the Streetcars Back is the horrible relationship between Gretchen and her abusive father, Otto Luttermann. Otto, a devout Christian, thrashes his daughter with a whip. After lashing at her naked body, he viciously rapes her. This is really, horrendously disgusting, a middle-aged man causing such terrible pain and humiliation to his own flesh and blood. This has to be the ultimate evil. He takes advantage of his own defenseless daughter by using God’s words as his means. Gretchen is physically abused. She receives welts, and is starved, but not only that, the psychological abuse must be extraordinary. She must endure the degradation at school, because her father forces her to wear revolting clothes and talk to no boys. But the worst secret is yet to come: Gretchen has her father’s baby. Otto forces Gretchen to drown the infant in a bathtub, “‘He was my baby, my little boy.’ She [Gretchen] kept looking out the window. ‘And my father make me do it. He held my hands under the water on Little Jacob and I couldn’t let go, and my baby kicked… and splashed… and…” (West 234). A horrible murder; covering up his evil deeds by killing his own son. How can a father do this? How can he torture something as helpless as Gretchen and not seem to feel remorse. He is worse than a lion eating its own cubs for food. This abuse has no purpose. Otto Luttermann is simply evil. He rapes and beats his daughters, kills his son, and almost seems to enjoy it. Enjoy the beat, and enjoy the raping of his own child. Otto should be in jail and never, ever come out.
Mankind is hideous, vile, and evil. To live as a human, one must accept these dire facts. However, not all is as sick as it appears. Stanley Gordon West shows that while there is evil in Man, there is also good. Cal saves Gretchen, not God, Cal. This demonstrates that by not having angels with beautiful wings and thousands of gold chariots descend from heaven and save Gretchen, but by Cal’s goodwill and loving, that man is not entirely evil as it seems. It is still good too.

Nick

United States

LAxline@aol.com

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Page Updated Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:11pm EDT