Damn You - Poetry - http://maxpages.com/adriano/Damn

Damn you!

What can I say but "damn you?"
You came into my life, like a relentless barge
bullying through the calm seas of my life.
Exasperating -- that is what you are.
Contemptable and boisterous and brash. Sharp
at the edges like a sword but somehow you never
cut me. Not once. And damn you still if you do
not know just when to smile, to laugh, to frown
and cry. And not only when, but where.

Oh what a cad! A con-artiste beyond compare.
Who else would have cried in the misty rain at
twilight, by the lake no less, showing a
surprisingly soft and vulnerable side? None but
you, damn you.

Damn you for remembering the things I love, for
knowing when I've had enough and for surrendering
when in the wrong. Such a cavalier. Damn you for
remembering my birthday, the day we met and what
I was wearing. Damn you for all the pains you take
to do special things I pretend not to notice. Like
putting the ashtray back exactly where it had been
stroking the picky perfectionist that I am with your
own determination. Damn you for your perfect
moderation in all things leaving me no room to nag or
complain, for knowing when to hold me and when to let
me go and moreso for your smile. And don't try to tell
me it is innocent, no smile like that is harmless.

Damn you for being there, for standing beside me and
when needed behind me. For being my equal and not
someone who would dominate, manipulate or control me.
For believing in me when no one else, not even myself,
could. Oh, and especially for the kisses and touches
all perfectly delivered, neither a moment too soon nor
too late. Damn you for the nod of encouragement, for
knowing exactly what I am talking about, like the time
with "dacron" when no one else has a clue. And of
course, you need no prompting to remember things we
talked about so long ago. The mere mention of a word
suffices. What a cunning creature. Damn you.

Damn you for the way you butter toast, scramble eggs
and eat cold speghetti. For how you make love and
never turn away when through, for how each love making
is strangely better than the last, for taking the time
and having the desire to learn my body and for having
me sing you to sleep contently in my arms. And for
that funny little dip in your cheast that my hand
feels so right over, for the blue of your eyes and the
gold in your hair, for the perfect intimacy you gave
so eagerly and for how indescribably sexy you are
naked. And for being ticklish in all the right places
and never at the wrong times. Oh yes, and for making
love on a moonlight fourth of July picnic by the lake
'neath the fullmoon, fireworks and in the rainbow
speckled rain. Further more for the walks in the rain a
nd for loving rain as much as I, I damn you all the
more.

Damn you for the way you taste, smell, sound and feel.
For how you walk, stand sit, breathe and sigh. For
your laugh, your voice, the way you sing and the very
words you use. For how you love every accursed thing
about me, understanding my eccentricities and even
seeming not to notice my bad traits. For loving life
and spreadng joy and lending hope to those who need it.
For being not only a lover but my best friend. For
the way your eyes change with your clothes and how
they tend to look violet in the right light.

For being so tall and so thin and so ultimately
perfect in my eyes. For miraculously fitting me like
a glove, for your sense of adventure, your child-like
moments of wonder and for bleu balls on the Christmas
tree.

Ah, Christmas. Damn you for making Christmas
something special these past fifteen years. For not
only being you, for loving me but for making me love
you also, for how you make me feel about myself not
only when I am with you but when I am not, for saying
how you will always love me as you walked out the door
at Christmas and then for never coming back. For
leaving me with all those damn presents in that
horrible winter in the middle of no where, for the
five years we spent together and the future we planned
that never came to pass.

For swearing to love me when I am olde and praying the
same from me in return. For still being in my heart
and mind and dreams after all these years as if it
were only yesterday.

But most of all, damn you for damning me.

adrian@iglou.com

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Page Updated Sun Oct 31, 1999 7:07am EST